The Princess Who Talked Mean!

A story about Hannah - this doesn't represent her "best" side, but I have to admit it's funny. Her teacher came to me this afternoon to show me something Hannah had drawn and written at school. She had finished her work early and turned it over on the back to do her own thing, something her teacher encourages. She drew a girl with a beautiful flowing dress (big dress - think prom dress!). She drew speech bubbles coming out of the girl's mouth with these words:

"I hat yoou" (I hate you)
"Yoou meG" (You mean - she actually says it with a slight g sound)
"You Bose" (You Bossy)
"Cit" (Quit)

Good writer, huh? I'm proud of her emerging writing skills. Her choice of words, however...She's not allowed to use the word "hate", and we've been talking a lot about "nice words" lately. Oh, the things they learn as they get older!! ughh. Anyway, in a different color marker, she had another speech bubble with the words "I soRe" (I sorry).

So, I was embarrassed. Her teacher wasn't showing it to me for that reason, she thought it was funny. And it was... I guess at least she's getting her frustrations out on paper by saying the things there I won't let her say out loud. Maybe I should buy her a journal!!

So tonight, as I was going over her work in her folder, I pulled out this same paper. I complimented Hannah on the work part on the front. Then turned it over and looked at the back again. This was our conversation.

Me: Tell me about this
Hannah: That girl said "You mean! you bossy! I hate you! QUIT!"
Me: Why did she say those ugly things?
Hannah: Because she's mean!
Me: Who is this girl?
Hannah: A princess.
Me: Who is she saying those mean things to?
Hannah: Her sister..uh..her older sister.
Me: What does this say? (pointing to the one in different color)
Hannah: She said "I sorry"
Me: Why did she say that?
Hannah: Because she was mean!
Me: That's a beautiful dress she has on. Is she going somewhere special?
Hannah: She's going to a ball..you know..a ball where people dance. She's going to a dance.
Me: That seems special. What do you think her mommy is going to say when she finds out she's been saying all these things that are not nice? Do you think her mommy will still let her go to the ball? Will she be in time-out?
Hannah: Her mommy will still take her to the ball. Because her mommy will FORGIVE (said loudly) her. She will just FORGIVE her and still take her to the ball.

(insert quick prayer by me for HELP!)

Me: Well, It's a good thing I'm not this princess' mommy. Because I would forgive her and still love her, but I sure wouldn't let her go to a ball. Because balls are special and only for princesses who know how to use kind words. She'd have to stay home since she doesn't know how to do that. Good thing I'm *your* mommy instead of hers. Because I'm sure *YOU* know how to talk nice and kind like a real princess!

Hannah: yeah!

SO..what do I do with THAT? :-)
The girl definately keeps me on my toes!!

Happy Easter!

*Please continue to keep Mary in your prayers! She's still in the hospital, had another surgery a couple days ago, still feeling rotten!* www.caringbridge.org/visit/princessbob

Happy Easter! We've had a great weekend here. We've had lots of fun hunting eggs, playing outside, making a cake (and licking the icing) and enjoying the weekend. Through it all, we've been telling and retelling and retelling that wonderful story that makes it all mean something, the Easter Story. We've read it, watched it on video, talked about it, and used Hannah's "Ressurection Eggs" she made at church last week to tell the story over and over. And honestly, it's been wonderful and tough at the same time. Wonderful to see the girls so interested and excited about the story. Mostly Hannah..Sadie's still a bit young. But Hannah at 3 would get excited and say "yeah, Jesus is alive". That's kind of where Sadie's at. Now though, Hannah can tell you the whole story..from the entry into Jerusalem through the last supper, Judas' betrayal of Jesus, praying in the garden, the crucifixtion, the tomb, the women coming to find the tomb empty the next morning...I mean..she can basically do it all. And it's great. But tough too..to see the story fresh through her eyes. She's had so many questions: why did they kill Jesus? Why did Jesus have to die? Didn't it hurt? Did he cry? Did he scream? Was Jesus scared? Was the cross heavy? Why didn't God help him? Why did Judas "trade" (betray) Jesus for money? That was not nice!! Why didn't the people who killed Jesus have to go to jail? What is sin? (umm..have you ever tried to explain that to a 5 year old? not so easy..) But Jesus didn't do anything wrong!! Her sense of the injustice of it all was obvious in her tone of voice and in her facial expressions. She would randomly ask these questions throughout the week (usually a bunch at once, then would go off to play and come back with some more later). Sometimes I didn't know if we'd ever get to Sunday and the ressurection! She was stuck in the stories of the week..in the darkness and the questions and the not understanding. I guess that's how the disciples felt too. I found myself wanting to hurry her along to Easter..to the ressurection..brush off some of the questions and let's get to the good part! But she would have none of that! So, we talked and talked and I answered the best I could those tough questions over and over. I don't know exactly how much she comprehended..I don't know how satisfying my answers were..and that's okay. I'm proud of her for asking the questions, and staying with it. For seeking an understanding even when it wasn't easy. And she helped me to view the story again with a fresh sense of awe, and mystery, and compassion, and sadness, and wonder, and finally..joy. Because in the end, He is RISEN!

And that makes all the difference in the world. So today, we remembered and celebrated that Jesus is Alive! Happy Easter!

(Hannah found these branches from a bush I trimmed on the driveway today. She decided to pretend they were palm branches and was waving them around shouting "HOSANNAH!")

What We've Been Up to Lately

First, Mary is still in the hospital. She was feeling better, but is now sick. Another surgery coming sometime soon..but not sure when. Keep her in your prayers and visit www.caringbridge.org/visit/princessbob

The week after Sadie's surgery was my spring break. We took it easy around here the first part of the week. The end of the week, we headed to my parents in north GA. The girls had a blast on that Thurs. riding around in a wagon they had.

I then got up very (VERY) early Friday morning and left the girls' at my parents for the weekend. I headed to a place I love: Camp Sumatanga. I had the wonderful priveledge of being part of the team for a spiritual retreat weekend for young adults (YAC - young adult chrysalis). It was an amazing weekend that I really believe made a difference in the kingdom of God both in the lives of the young adults that participated, as well as in us "older" young adults. It made a difference in me in ways I'm not sure I can quite articulate. It was wonderful to be there and be "away" for the weekend. I dont' want to say I didn't miss the girls, because I did. But, I didn't worry about them (they were, after all, being spoiled rotten by grandparents!) and I was very content to be where I was doing what I was doing..singing songs of praise and being quiet and still, making new friends and reconnecting with some old friends too, laughing, worshipping, sharing, and listening..it was just a great weekend.

I then met my mom to pick up the girls (who yes, had a blast and were loaded up with new clothes and toys..). And while I was completely content and happy to be at camp for the weekend, I was also completely content and happy for the weekend to end and to spend some time with the sweetest two little girls ever!

The next day, we headed back to Atlanta for Sadie's bandages to come off. Her wrist looked good, though still swollen and bruised a bit. The x-rays looked great and her surgeon is very pleased with everything. They set her up with a bright orange cast (her choice) and we headed home. She gets the cast off in 3 more weeks. And I don't know what she plans to be the first thing she does, but I plan for her to soak in the bathtub!! For a while!!

Finally, I had to face reality that spring break was over. I headed back to school for the last quarter of the year. I also finished my portfolio I've been working on all year for my national board certification. I mailed it off yesterday. I thought I'd be so relieved to have it out of my hands, but truthfully, when I got back in the car from the post office, I was simply tired. :-) I still have the assessment test to take at the end of May, and I won't know the results until November. But, it does feel good to have that big portfolio off my list of "things to do". :-)

Please Keep Praying for Sweet Mary

It's been a while since I last posted. I updated you that my sweet little friend Mary was home from the hospital and doing well. Well, I'm sad to say that it didn't last long. She has been back in the hospital for the last week. She's had it really rough. The doctors can't figure out what's going on. They keep saying her shunt appears to be working right, but yet Mary's symptoms say that it's not. She's had another surgery, and is looking at still possibly ANOTHER one in the next few days. My heart just breaks for her and for her sweet sweet family. Mary's mama Jana is TIRED. Tired of being in the hospital, tired of watching her baby girl in pain, tired of doctors not knowing how to fix it, tired of surgeries, tired of not having her family together, you get the picture. Please keep Jana, Mary, and her family in your prayers. They are a very special family and Mary is a very special little girl who lights up every room she walks in. Her life has been truly miraculous. Before she was born, doctors thought she was going to be much more severely affected and have many serious issues. Instead - Mary has proved them wrong and has done amazingly well. She's 9 years old and sweet and spunky. Please just continue to lift her up to Jesus. If you want to keep up with her as you pray, visit www.caringbridge.org/visit/princessbob
(You can see cute pictures of this beautiful child there too - I've been trying all evening to get one on here and my computer is not cooperating!!)

Quick Update - Sadie and Mary

***UPDATE***
Mary is home and doing well! :-)

Hi friends,
Sadie is doing well. Her surgery went very well and her surgeon was very pleased with the way her wrist looked. I haven't seen it yet because it is covered with a splint and bandaged up. I won't see it until her post-op appointment next week. But it's good to know he was happy with the results. She was a trooper. I LOVE that the surgery center in Atlanta allows parents to accompany the kids to the OR. I wish Children's in Birmingham did. I know it could make it worse in some situations...and Atlanta does reserve the right to say no. (I guess if you're freaking out they might tell you no..). But for Sadie, it helps so much. I think it would ease things for Hannah too - but her surgeries are all here and it's not an option here. Anyway, I took her to the OR, held her until they were ready, put her on the bed and held her hand and rubbed her head while they put the mask over her face. Quick, painless, and easy for her. She wasn't a bit upset. After she was asleep, I was escorted out and back to a waiting area. She woke up pretty easily too. She cried some, but settled pretty quickly. She drank some juice, I got her dressed, and we were out of there. She slept most of the day and a good bit yesterday too. But she's been eating, and when she's awake she has been playing some. Today, she's been awake all day and pretty spunky and playful. I can tell her arm bothers her some when the pain meds start wearing off..but I can also tell that's better today than yesterday. Overall, she's done great!!
Hannah also did well staying with my friends. She told me "I was brave". She's glad to be home though and she and Sadie have played very well together today. My challenge (again..we faced this in Dec.) is going to be keeping Hannah calm enough to get Sadie all wound up...for a few days at least. But we are all doing well..thanks for the thoughts and prayers.

Mary, my sweet little friend from church I posted about, is doing okay I think. She's had it rough though. Since I last posted, she's had two more surgeries. The last I heard, she seemed to be doing better after her last one a couple days ago. Keep praying for her that this is it and she gets to go home soon.

Oh - just a little tidbit I learned..useless information I guess but I found it interesting. For my kids' surgeries (4 total for both of them), they've always been asked what flavor gas they wanted..strawberry, grape, bubble gum, etc. I (naively I guess) really thought they had different flavor gasses to put them to sleep. Why not? The dentist has different flavors of flouride. This was at two hospitals in two different states. Anyway, we get in the OR and as I'm holding Sadie in my lap (they're not quite ready for her yet), I catch one of the anesthesiologist team members holding the mask down where Sadie can't see it and he takes out a LIP SMACKER (you know..scented chapstick) and rubs it all over the inside of her mask. I laughed and asked "is that really how you flavor the gas?" and he winked and said "shh". He said he bet that I thought it was something more technical than that. I had to agree..
Anyway, useless info..but I found it interesting. I guess the moral is if your kid is going to have surgery and has an absolute favorite flavor..buy the lip smacker and slip it to the anesthesiologist! (I did ask him to put some on her lips when they were done because they were chapped! I was half-kidding!)

Another Prayer Request - for Sadie

Hi friends,
Sadie is having her 2nd surgery on her arm this Thursday (3/12/09). We will be heading to Atlanta tomorrow (Wed) evening and will be back Friday. She will have the fixator off her arm (YEAH! She keeps saying "Bye bye bar!") and a procedure called "radialization" that will finish straightening her hand (it involves some technical stuff including some tendon transfers to balance out her hand and that will hopefully prevent it from turning back inwards again). She will come out of surgery with a splint that she will keep for about 10 days until our post-op visit and at that time she will have a cast. I'm not sure yet how long she will have the cast..it kind of depends what all her surgeon has to do once he gets in there. Most likely she will only have it 2-4 weeks.
Please pray for my little Sadie's surgery Thursday morning and her recovery in the days that follow. You can also say a prayer for Hannah, who will be staying with some good friends for a couple of nights...she's come SO far, but it still makes her a bit nervous to spend the night somewhere other than home, especially when she's separated from not just me, but Sadie too.

Please Pray

Hi Friends,


I have a sweet little 9 year old friend from church at Children's Hospital right now that could use your prayers. Mary has hydrocephalus and has had problems with her shunt several times in the past. I think she's had like somewhere around 13 (not sure exactly) brain surgeries in her life. But right now, she is especially having a hard time. I don't know all the details, but she's had about 4 of those surgeries in the last couple weeks. Right now she's in the middle of 7 days of antibiotics and then she will have another surgery. I heard from Mary's mom this afternoon and she's in a lot of pain with horrible headaches and throwing up a lot. Mary is a precious child who has always had a special place in my heart along with the rest of her family. Please, please say a prayer that she will feel better and the doctors can fix whatever needs fixing so her shunt works and doesn't cause her pain! And you can pray for her mom Jana who is I'm sure quite exhausted! Jana also has two boys at home who I'm sure are missing their mom and little sister! Thanks y'all!

SNOW!

Snowball fight!

The girls with our next door neighbor and our snowman

I call this guy the "chicken pox" snowman due to the fruit loops stuck all over him!

When the snow started melting, we had huge mud puddles all over the yard. I think Sadie especially enjoyed splashing in the mud as much as anything!!

Enjoying shaved ice "snow cones"

Enjoying hot chocolate and a movie after changing into dry clothes:

33 Months

33 months. That's pretty random and won't mean much to most people. But Hannah was 33 months old when I adopted her at the very end of May 2006. And today is 33 months later. Which means from this point out, Hannah has been with me longer than she has not. Not an earth-shattering thought or even hugely sentimental. She has been mine since day 1. But, the thought does make me smile.

Want to know how we celebrated today? Well, truth be told, although I've known for a while that today was the 33 month mark, I actually completely forgot once it got here. Didn't think about it at all until just a few minutes ago...long after I put the girls to bed. But, we did do fun things this afternoon..just because. As we headed home from school in the middle of pretty good rain, I was thinking.."well, no outside play today. we're stuck inside for the day and likely most of the day tomorrow according to the weather folks". So, I did what anyone else would have done on a cold, rainy day. I stopped at the store for ice-cream! We came home, changed into pajamas, spread a blanket on the floor, put in a movie, and cuddled under our blankets while eating ice-cream! Fun times!

I hope everyone has a good weekend..and for those of you who live in the general area I do, can't wait to see what this weekend brings. Rain and storms tonight..snow tomorrow night?? Not getting my hopes up..but it would be fun!

My Family Has a Marathon Finisher

Hannah ran in the Mercedes Kids Marathon this morning and did great! I was so proud of her. She's been "training" all year at school in her P.E. class by running the first 25.2 miles over the course of the year. Then, she and about 25 others from our school ran the last mile on the official course today downtown along with who knows how many other kids (thousands I think!) There were about 7 kindergarteners from our school and two were in Hannah's class. After a group photo, we split up to wander around waiting for our turn. Kindergarten ran last. By the time we lined up for the race, it was so crowded and we couldn't find any of the kids she knew. But, she marched on out there to the starting line anyway..looking a bit nervous but determined. And my determined little girl finished her mile strong. Much to her delight, she received a medal and a powerade. And she convinced me to stop for McDonald's on the way home too.

I was very proud of Hannah for the simple reason that she's mine. And I know that as excited as she was, she was also scared...a mile is a long way for a 5 year old to run with a bunch of kids you don't know when you can't see familiar faces until you near the end (where I was). So - her efforts and bravery were well noted. But there were a handful of others I was proud of too: the third grader who rolled over the finish line in his wheelchair, the 2nd grader who finished behind the last 1st grader (grades started 12 minutes apart with the older grades going first) and had a huge smile on her face as she ran by me, the very small 1st grader with obvious disabilities who ran with her mother and did a limp/walk/run/shuffle all the way, and the parents standing near me who cheered every bit as loud for these kids and for every child that passed by as they did for their own. It was a good day.

Hanging out by the fountain at Linn Park waiting for her age-group to line up.

Here's all the runners from my school before their races.

Hannah with a sweet friend from her class

This is the only picture I got of Hannah running. By the time she got close enough for me to see her and I got my camera focused on her, she was past me!

Checking out her medal after the race

All I wanted was to finish grocery shopping!

So, after church I took the girls to the grocery store. We usually go Fridays after school or Saturdays after Hannah's dance class. But we had other things going on this weekend and didn't get to it. So - after church it was. I knew it wasn't a great time to go - it was nap time for Sadie. But we didn't need too much and I thought "let's just get it done while we're out". So, I'm pushing the cart (Winn Dixie has new carts by the way...and their "car" carts aren't as big as they used to be so it's great!) and trying to get through the list quickly..when uh-oh, sweet looking older woman is staring at us. Not unfriendly stares...she smiles and says hello. I smile and answer hello and keep looking at the apples I'm deciding on. I don't really want a friendly chat at the moment, I want to get done quickly and get home before the "window of opportunity" for nap time fades away or before someone melts down from being tired. But, sweet looking lady moves in closer and strikes up a conversation with the girls. They tend to draw attention sometimes. When they both glance at her, here's how the conversation goes.

lady: oh, I thought they were twins for a minute. (Hannah is WAY bigger than Sadie by the way). I can see now that they're not.
me: (smile) no, not twins. (move on to the bananas)
lady: (follows us)..No, they're not twins are they?
me: no. This one (pointing to Hannah) is older.
Hannah: She's younger. I'm five and she's three.
lady: How old are you? (to Hannah who just shared that)
Hannah: 5
lady: and how old is the other one?
me: 3 (seeing where this might be headed, I try to move on)
Hannah: (friendly, but no clue where this is going...) We're sisters!
lady: oh, they're sisters?
me: yes.
lady: REALLY? They're really sisters?
me: yes.
lady: I bet you adopted them!
me: yes, I did.
lady: (very smug look on her face) I could tell..I just thought you had.
me: (thinking to myself "gee, is it that obvious I'm not chinese?") keeps silent and smiles and starts off again.
lady: Do they know they're adopted?
me: um..they do now thanks to you. (JUST KIDDING - I didn't say that one, just thought it) yes, they do. Girls, tell the nice lady to have a good day.
Hannah and Sadie: Have a good day
lady: wait..did you get them at the same time?
me: (Hannah's listening..she knows the truth so I decide to be honest) no
lady: But you said they were sisters.
me: They are. Bye (fake smile and walk away quickly!)

I mean really! So, for those who need to know (mostly strangers who will never read this blog..not the people who do read it..but oh well.)

Yes, Hannah and Sadie are adopted.
Yes, they know they are adopted. (Hannah knows, Sadie doesn't understand the word "adopted" yet but she does know she's from China)
Yes, they are my daughters.
Yes, they are my REAL daughters.
Yes, Hannah and Sadie are sisters.
Yes, they are REALLY sisters.

And for the record, I am their only parent. I have only one set of parents. Yet, they have more than one set of grandparents. My only sibling (a brother) doesn't have any children. Yet Sadie and Hannah have three cousins.

Hope that answers all the questions out there! Except of course, most of those questions come from complete strangers like I said..not the wonderful friends or follow adoptive moms who read here. oh well..

And I really don't mind answering quetions..it's just that sensitive questions should be asked outside of my kids' hearing..and by people who either have a reason for asking (like if you want to adopt - you can ask me anything!) or at least by people who know me well enough to ask personal questions. (At the minimum I should at least know your name!)

Rant over. Have a good afternoon!

Chinese New Year 2009

Chinese New Year was a fun celebration as usual. Last weekend, we headed to a local Chinese restaurant with other adoptive families from our area. The kids looked beautiful in their special clothing of course. They enjoyed crafts, food, balloons, and running around crazy with their friends. They really are a great looking group of kids, but I don't think we ever got them to all look at the camera at the same time. I mean, they had balloons!! The balloons were much more fun to look at than the cameras!

(My sweet little Sadie has developed a spunky attitude from time to time! Notice her sticking her tongue out in this photo!)

We skipped out on the larger CNY celebration in downtown Birmingham this year. I took Hannah the last two years, and I'm going to try to take them both again next year. It's usually fun, but we just needed a "down time" Saturday today so that's what we did. I did teach a Chinese New Year unit this week to my students at school for the second year. Since Hannah is in kindergarten, I also took one of my lessons on China and the new year and presented it to her class. I shared some of the objects we have from China, Hannah shared some Chinese words she knows (of course, she's learned them all from the T.V. show "Nihao Kai-Lan!), I read a story, and then the kids made dragon puppets. They had a great time and seemed very interested. Hannah smiled and was so excited the whole time. She's in a wonderful class this year with a great teacher and she has such sweet friends in her class.

Hannah's teacher shared with me her journal entry for that day. Hannah drew her family. Over Sadie, she wrote a "3", over herself she wrote a "5", and over me she wrote my age. Then under all that she wrote her sentence. "my fameelee is brown and pinkish." She told her teacher "me and Sadie are brown. Mommy is pinkish". It was too cute!

Random Ramblings..Just Because I Can!

It’s Sunday night, which usually means getting ready for a new week. Except we’re out of school tomorrow! Yeah!! The girls have been in bed since 7:15. Their normal bedtime is 7:30, except on non-school nights we usually go to 8:00. But, they were supposed to be in their “settling down” time eating a little snack and watching a movie. (They don’t get movies or tv on school nights, so it’s a treat). Well, I was upstairs putting away clothes and they got all giggly. Then louder giggly. Aw, so sweet that the sisters are enjoying each other’s company so much. Then LOUDER giggly, and I went to see what they were up to. They were BOTH standing on the very back of the couch ready to jump off (and apparently already had before then). Umm..no. I’m all for fun and all. And Hannah’s got the gymnastics skills to do it and be okay. But Sadie does not. AND she has a fixator on her arm. AND I really didn’t want a trip to the emergency room. AND I’ve had this conversation about safety with them regarding the couch before. More than once. SO, they both ended up in bed immediately. They were not happy with me at all. But my evening is much better this way than it would have been at the emergency room. Theirs is too of course, only they don’t know it. I do wish I'd gotten a photo of them..but I couldn't exactly say "hey, you're in trouble, but smile for the picture first!".

So, that basically means I’ve had much more “free time” than most evenings. And since I’m a procrastinator and don’t intend to get things ready for school until tomorrow night, it means I really have more free time. Thus..this completely random post.

I love my life. I took the girls to the park today. Hannah was riding her bike way out ahead and I was walking with Sadie in the stroller. (because she can’t ride her bike with her arm right now, but it’s okay – she loves the ride. And she has plenty of outside play in our back yard). After a while, Hannah circled back and rode to where we were and said “I want to ride by y’all”. okay. Me and my two precious girls riding / walking at the park on a Sunday afternoon. Everybody happy. Everybody wanting to be there together. It doesn’t get better than that. I love my life.

For some strange reason, I was reflecting on life tonight. Oh, yeah – it was because I had extra time since I put the girls to bed early. I used to be a pretty reflective person. Don’t seem to get around to that much anymore. These days, I reflect on such mundane things as “how long will it take to cook the chicken vs. the spaghetti?” or “should I trust that my newly potty trained 3 year old can make it the whole 25 minute drive to church in panties?” (I did and she did) or “Is it okay to tell my five year old the real difference between boys and girls since she’s asking?” (I did..with instructions not to discuss it at school!) or maybe “how late should I keep them up on Friday night to increase the odds of them sleeping in until at least 7:00 a.m.? (forget it – it backfires every time!). But in the quiet moments of night on a rare free evening, my reflections are very much like they were before I adopted the girls. Some different..yet some the same. Deeper questions come to my heart. Why me? Why has God blessed me SO much? Why has He given me such treasures? Who I am to parent these girls? Why am I so incredibly blessed? And I don’t just mean as far as the girls. But with a job and co-workers I love. With friends I love. Ah..friends. There’s a whole group of relatively new friends I wouldn’t know at all if it weren’t for my girls. Or wouldn’t know as well. Or have in my life as much. And I don’t get to spend time with them much these days..but yet our lives are twisted together in a way that makes me smile to know they know. They know what it’s like to have a child home for those first few months to a year. They know the endless dr. appointments, therapy appointments, adjustments, attachment process, etc. They know the hard things, and they know the great wonderful joyful things (of which there have been many!) We’re going to celebrate Chinese New Year next weekend with just a few of those families. This will be our third time with these same families. Well..some new ones too. And I’m lucky that quite a few of the kids are the same age as my girls. That doesn’t really mean anything to Sadie yet..and it’s just beginning to mean something to Hannah. Although she thinks every child with light brown skin is from China. (even if it’s really India or Mexico – both real life examples!). She’s just beginning to have questions about her story and her history. And I know there will be phases over the years of questions. I hope she finds some comfort..or some understanding..or whatever she needs in knowing other girls her age with similar life stories. Sadie too.

And then there’s my other friends. I don’t want to say old friends, because they’re NOT. Not old in age or old in the sense of prior. They are very much still my very real, very important friends. I guess I just mean not new. The friends who knew me before. And depending on exactly who, it could be before many things. They know. They knew me before ______. And I can’t tell you just how important they are to me. I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without them. And I mean that on so many levels. And as far as my girls, they wouldn’t be here without them. God worked in a mighty to bring them home. And he did a lot of it through these amazing friends who encouraged, listened, prayed, gave, and loved me through the whole experience. I wish so much I could repay all they have done for me. And yet, I can’t. The irony is that a partial result of all they gave on my behalf is that I am now simply …*busy*. But you know what? I think mostly they understand. And I do know, I mean I really really know, that if I needed them, I could pick up the phone and they’d be there for me. Even if we hadn’t talked in a long time. Now how blessed is that?? I hope they know they can do the same. I hope you know, if you’re reading this as one of my real-life friends who I haven’t been good about keeping in touch with, you are still important to me!

Well..this reflection didn’t go at all the way I originally thought it would. .There were other thoughts I intended to share, and got off on a tangent. But perhaps it was exactly the tangent I needed to get off on. And as far as those orginial thoughts, you’ll just have to wonder. Maybe I’ll have another rare free night when I sit and reflect and then have the urge to blog about it. But don’t expect it too soon! In summary, I love my life. God is good. Good night!

(And if you want to see updates on Sadie’s arm..scroll down. Two posts in one night!)

Sadie's hand update and developmental milestones!

Sadie is doing great with her fixator, though I can tell it's starting to get a little harder. Amazing really. She's outlasted what her dr. said she would. I've been turning the thing 3 degrees a day. I was told in the beginning about the 2nd week I'd have to start breaking it up and doing half in the morning and half at night and might even have to move to 1 degree three times a day if that got to be too much. Well, we are into week 4 now and I just this weekend started doing half in the morning and half at night. She has just tolerated everything so well and not seemed to be in any discomfort or pain at all. But, the last couple of days she has started to fuss a bit so I've started breaking it up and that's gone really well. At her last appointment (this past Thursday), her surgeon said we probably only have about 2 more weeks of this and then we'll be done. Yeah! :-) Then the fixator will stay on a while to hold everything in place before her next surgery. Not sure when that'll be yet. Here's some before and "in progress" pictures if you're curious. I can tell a big difference when I look at these that I don't necessarily see day to day since it moves just a small amount each day.

Pre-surgery:

Beginning of week 2 of adjusting fixator:

Beginning of week 4 of adjusting fixator
By the way - the last two pics do have Sadie in the same shirt. Trust me - she didn't wear it for two weeks straight. (now, two days straight..well..maybe). It's a favorite now because it has big sleeves and is easy to get on over the fixator. Speaking of clothes, I need to get a pic of her coat. Sherry, her babysitter, picked up a coat just a little too big at the thrift store and cut up the left side all the way up including the arm and sewed bra hooks on it. That was, I can get it on and off her arm. It was perfect and much needed in these last few cold days.

In other news, Sadie is now wearing her "big girl panties"! Yeah! She was not potty trained when I got her in May. I decided not to push it and just let her be. She had enough adjustments and medical stuff and all. Well, over Christmas break I gave it a try. The first two weeks were well, interesting. She could care less about staying dry. But then something clicked and the third week she got it! She's had a handful of accidents, but that was it. Today marks day 7 accident free! (Well, except at nap and at night..but I don't count that!). I have to give a big thanks to her wonderful babysitter who really followed through and helped get her to this point! Sadie not only stays dry, but asks to go and if we're home will just take herself when needed. I consider her officially potty trained! Ah..the little things, but in our world, they're BIG! yeah Sadie!



Sadie has also entered the typical stage for her age of saying "no". A lot. Not temper tantrum no. She's very calm about it. Just a simple "no". It's kind of funny, but was starting to frustrate Hannah. Hannah would say something that was clearly true and Sadie would look at her and simply say "no". Hannah couldn't stand it. I finally had a chat with Hannah and told her that she was old enough to know a special secret. The secret was "3 year olds just like the word no" and the best thing for us to do was to just shrug and say "oh well". Well, Hannah took to that advice and it has made things much more pleasant around here. The other day though, Hannah informed me that she thought a 5 year old's favorite word was yes. (I'm thinking..um..I don't think so..but I could use a few more YES's from you, so sure, I'll encourage this!). Then she said, want to know what a grown-up's favorite word is? (This could be good, I'm thinking). She said "A grown up's favorite word is "We'll see"! Ha! too funny. The girl's got me down pat! I'm a little suprised she didn't say a grown up's favorite words are "we'll see and if you ask me again, the answer is no". :-)

Christmas Fun!

We had a great Christmas. I know I'm behind all my other blogging buddies in putting up Christmas pictures. But, here they are! We had a great time. Christmas Eve was quiet and low key. We did make it to our Christmas Eve service at church. Bedtime was NOT so low key and quiet. Hannah was very over excited and didn't fall asleep until after 11:00! That didn't stop her from waking me and Sadie up at 6:15 on Christmas Day though! Sadie was not ready to get up and did not want to go downstairs. Not really understanding why Hannah was jumping up and down excited and yelling "don't you want to go downstairs and see what Santa brought?? don't you..don't you??!", Sadie just kept saying "no" and rolling over. Finally, I got her up and we all headed downstairs. Once she saw what was waiting for her, Sadie perked up and had a great time. They both were thrilled with their presents. Their big gift was a set of puppets and a doorway puppet theatre to share. Later, my parents and grandfather came over for lunch and we exchanged more gifts. The girls had a blast playing with with everyone. The following morning, we headed over to Beth and Wayne's (nana and granddaddy) house where all their cousins were that day and exchanged gifts again! Hannah stayed to play with Elizabeth since we don't get to see them very often. And those girls have always had a bond that's neat to see. They are two years apart, but very much alike and they get along very well. I took Sadie home however for a nap and some quiet time with mommy. With all the excitement of the holidays, following doctor's orders to limit her activity level was about impossible anytime she was around other kids. But Christmas was good at our house. It was good to see them so excited and loving every minute. And you want to know a secret? It was so special watching Sadie in her first Christmas home. And great watching Hannah be so excited. But, it's also fun that Hannah is old enough now that we are slowing moving out of those toddlerish / preschool toys for her. Not completely..she still loves the ones she has and she still plays with her dolls and stuffed animals and princess stuff. She loved the tinkerbell play set she got from her grandfather and was thrilled with the princess leapster game she got. But, she also got some stuff that *I've* had fun with!! ha! craft kits, interesting books that I enjoy reading to her, and a game that's actually fun to play! (Honest confesssion - I'll play the preschool games, but I just don't actually enjoy Candyland). Anyway, Happy New Year!!

(Does this face not just scream "excited!" She was jumping up and down too!)

Sadie checking out her stocking stash (with piece of chocolate already in her mouth! That girl loves some candy!)

Puppet show time! We've all three had fun with this one!

Wearing gradma's glasses

The girls hanging out with papa (my grandfather)

Tinkerbell flies off on her new hippity hop!

Enjoying a ride on grandpa's shoulders

Sadie's Surgery Update

We are home and Sadie is doing well. We started our trip to Atlanta a little earlier than planned. Our dr. office called on Thursday morning to tell me that our time had changed and we needed to be at the hospital at 6:30 the next morning. You know, that's 5:30 in our time zone. That would mean leaving my house at 2:30 in the morning! yikes! So, I made some quick changes, left school early, and was able to get things together to leave that evening instead. It turned out great because I actually left my house right about Sadie's normal bedtime. She slept most of the way there. Friday morning, Sadie was in a good mood and all smiles for everyone. I love this picture of her in her hospital gown and the hat! That was actually my hat I had to wear to accompany her into the OR. But while we were waiting Sadie had some fun with it.

When it was time, I was allowed to accompany her to the OR and stay with her until she was asleep. I just sat beside her and was rubbing her arm talking to her while she breathed in the mask and fell asleep. It was so gentle, easy, and non-traumatic. Then, I was escorted out of the OR and to a post-op room to wait. Her surgery only took a little over an hour, and during that time I was able to go downstairs to fill her prescriptions. Her surgeon came to talk to me when they were finished and said she did great! He gave me some instructions and then I just had to wait until she came out of recovery. When they brought her to me a few minutes later, she was just barely awake, but not really. She would open her eyes and look at me, I'd ask her if she was ready to sit up, she'd say "no" and close her eyes again. She slept on and off like this for close to an hour. Finally, she sat up, drank some juice, and asked for her shoes. Amazing!

When we got back to the hotel room, she was very sleepy and a bit nauseous for the first couple hours. But after a good nap, we were even able to go out for a little while and get something to eat, though she didn't eat but a few bites of anything. We stopped at Family Dollar and Sadie, who NEVER begs for toys, latched on to a toy cash register and wasn't letting go. What was I suppossed to do when she chose to insist on a toy for the first time on the same day she had surgery and had both arms bandaged up? I intended to buy her one there anyway, but I was thinking of the $1-$2 toys. Nope - she picks the $10 one (that wasn't worth $10). I guess she figured I wouldn't say no to her on that day. She was right - she came back to the hotel with the cash register. :-)

Sadie slept well through the night, only waking once for pain medicine. When she woke up this morning she was hungry and anxious to go home. We ate some breakfast (yummy banana bread thanks to one of my students!!), packed up, and were home before lunchtime. We have taken it easy and relaxed today. That's the plan for a while. We return to Atlanta on the 29th for a post-op visit and to have Sadie's bandages removed. At that time, I will learn how to clean the fixator and adjust it each day. Until then, it's to be left alone. Except, her surgeon told me I needed to find something to cover the pins sticking out. He said I'd just have to get creative because they had not come up with a good solution yet. I tried a couple things at home - and this is what I came up with - sponges covered with disney princess medical tape. So far, so good. The blue bandage on her right hand (where her thumb was removed) can be taken off tomorrow night. She doesn't seem to be affected by that hand at all - she just does everything with it like she was before.

Sadie is still on some pain medicine, but there's only been a couple times she seemed to be hurting. On the way home today, she got a bit restless in the car and started whining and fussing. I asked her "does it hurt?". She said "yes". So I asked "your arm hurts?", to which she replied "NO. leg. leg hurt". Then, it was "tummy hurt". Then "ear hurt", "foot hurt", "nose hurt", and on and on. It was too funny. All of a sudden everything hurt EXCEPT the part of her body that had surgery. I think she was just ready to be home because as soon as we got home, she seemed to feel good. The biggest challenge I think is going to be following her dr. orders to limit activity level for two weeks. She's clearly feeling so much better now that we're home and has been enjoying playing with Hannah. Thanks so much for all the prayers!!

Prayer Request and Christmas Pictures

What a busy time we had this past weekend! Friday, Sadie and I trekked to Atlanta for her pre-op appointment. She's having surgery there on Friday. Sadie will be having her right "floppy thumb" removed and a fixator placed on her left hand / wrist that will stretch some of her muscles out before her next surgery in a couple months. Altogether we are looking at probably 3 surgeries in the next 6-12 months, but then we should be done. I'd appreciate your prayers for my sweet baby girl Friday and for her recovery after surgery. The actual surgery is outpatient, and we will be staying in Atlanta for one night before coming home Saturday morning. You can also pray for traffic conditions going into Atlanta Friday morning - yikes!

Saturday morning, we headed to my school for their annual Pancake Breakfast / visit with Santa / auction / fundraiser. Kindergarten was singing that morning which meant Hannah was singing. She was beyond excited. Hannah was great - very dramatic with her motions to the song and she sang every word. She is such a performer. Look for her on a stage near you one day!! (Hannah in white shirt / red pants)

We saw Santa there at the school. Yeah! Picture with Santa - check off the list! Now I don't have to go to the mall (although he IS my favorite, but we're going to make do with this friendly Santa this year). Sadie looked like she might cry for about 5 seconds and then glanced at Hannah. When she saw Hannah liked Santa, she decided she'd like him too! Ah - sibling peer pressure at it's best! (sorry, no pic. of the girls with Santa either right now)

This picture was suppossed to be of the two little girls. The little one in blue is Ella, Sadie's friend from her babysitter. They LOVE each other. Can't you tell from this picture? ha! They really do love each other, and at least mine loves to have her picture taken. But we had just walked through a huge crowd (100's of kindergarteners who just finished performing and their parents) and Sadie was a little freaked by it. Then we saw Ella. You know how it's kind of weird when you see someone you know from one setting in a completely different setting and it kind of makes you step back and go "wait!" (or is that just me?). I think that's what Ella and Sadie were feeling. They wouldn't even smile when we got the two big sisters to come join them. oh well.

Saturday night, I took Hannah and her friend Joy on a special "big girls" outing to see the Nutcracker. It was long, but lots of fun. They both sat on the edge of their seats for the entire two and a half hours. Well, except for intermission when they were both dancing in the hallway trying to imitate the dancers from the ballet. I hope next year Sadie can join us. This is the second year I've taken Hannah and she loves it. But Sadie was still a little young and it would have crushed Hannah to have to leave early because Sadie got restless. So - she enjoyed a fun "little kids" evening with Nana and her favorite 2 year old cousin Bill.

Here's some Christmas pictures I took last weekend with the girls before church.

*I love how Sadie is looking at Hannah for her cue on what kind of face to make! Silly Face picture!

*"okay - let's look sweet and do a good job in this one. Mom won't let us leave here you know until she gets a photo worthy of a Christmas card. Trust me, I've done this for the last two years." (just for the record, I'm not doing Christmas cards this year, at least not before Christmas. I'm aiming for a New Year's card though...it's a goal, not a promise!)

*I let Hannah take this picture, just for fun. I thought she did a good job!

There were many more pictures I intended for this post...maybe they'll get added later. Maybe. :-)

In the meantime, I hope you are all enjoying this Christmas season!

Updates

I hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving. We spent a couple days at my parents and enjoyed that. Here's the girls with their great-grandfather the day after Thanksgiving.

While we were there, we visited the mall and saw this bungee-jump thing set up. Hannah wanted to try it so I let her. And then Sadie wanted to try it, so she went too. They had a blast!

Seems like there's been so much to update on lately and now that I've actually sat down at the computer to do it, I'm having a hard time thinking what exactly to update on! But once I start writing I usually go with it, so here goes....

Sadie -
She is doing great! Talking more and more each day. She's happy and easy going for the most part. She's sleeping great. Having two children is more work than one in many ways. But I know I've had more energy these last six months than I had the first six months Hannah was home. So, in that sense it's easier. Um, possibly because Hannah didn't sleep through the night for a year. But both my girls are regularly sleeping through the night and except for a day here and there (usually when one doesn't feel well), they have been the last 6 months. Ah..they sleep through the night = I sleep through the night = we all are happier and more pleasant (at least some times!). But back to Sadie, she's simply amazing at how she's just gone with the flow with everything. Medically, she's been tougher though. I think we've seen most of the specialists at Children's Hospital. Not really, but it seems that way. Everything is good..no major problems. It's just taken a lot of time and visits to get it all sorted out that everything is good. I heard from the genetics clinic right before Thanksgiving. All Sadie's genetic testing came back normal. She does not have any syndromes or chromosone abmormalities. So, that was a relief and a praise.

I keep thinking we're going to wind up all these dr. appointments soon, but we're really not. We're just starting "phase 2"! I can't complain though because we have gotten good reports at every single one. Sadie goes back to the international adoption clinic in a couple weeks for a follow up appointment. We also have a pre-op appointment next week in Atlanta. Then, Sadie is having her first surgery in Atlanta on December 19th. It's outpatient, but we will spend one night in Atlanta just to be close to the hospital / surgeon should any issues come up. In some ways, I don't like that it's right before Christmas, her first Christmas home. But, the good thing is that it gives me two full weeks off with her afterwards before I go back to school. Oh, and the other thing about Sadie is that I spoke with the nurse who works with her nephrologist (kidney dr.) this week. I explained my slight concern about the kidney issues associated with melamine (see earlier post) in China. She assured me that if there was anything going on, they would have caught it since they did such a thourough work-up on her kidneys already. But, she also pulled up Sadie's ultrasound and lab results on the computer just to double-check for me. Everything was great. Yeah! So many things to thank God for these days!!

Hannah -

Also doing well. Still loving kindergarten. Still spunky. And sweet. And my, the conversations we've had in the car lately. After I drop Sadie off at her babysitter in the mornings, the rest of the ride to work / school is full of Hannah's questions. Lately, about God. I think I need to go to seminary and get some training just to answer her questions!! Well, actually, I think she'd stump them too. Lately we've had:

1. Why did God make sharks so that they would bite people?

2. If Jesus is in your heart, how come you can't feel his feet in your heart?

(my answer that Jesus' spirit was in your heart not his body didn't satisfy. Hannah insists that He needs feet to walk and she can't feel his feet!)

3. If Jesus is our King, why doesn't he have a throne? I thought this one was easy and said He did have a throne, in heaven. Then she came back with "don't you think He needs to leave his throne and come down here and help people?"

4. Statement instead of a question: "I will see Jesus in heaven one day. Not today, but ONE day. I'm not old enough yet. But you are old enough" (Thanks a lot!)

5. Speaking of Christmas being Jesus' birthday "How old is he? Are we going to have a birthday cake? (yes), How is Jesus going to blow the candles off his cake (all 2008 of them!!)? I told Hannah we would do just a couple candles since we couldn't put enough candles on the cake for how old Jesus was. And that I was sure Jesus wouldn't mind if we blew the candles out for him. Her answer? "No. I will just pray to Jesus. I will talk to him and tell him will you please come off your throne and come to your birthday party and blow your candles off your cake!"

I'm telling y'all - I'm mentally exhausted by 7:30 in the mornings! But I also LOVE that she's that interested and pray that she always asks the questions of faith!

If you asked Hannah what the most important thing that's happened lately for her, it would be that she got new shoes. And it was a big deal because it was her first pair of "tie shoes". See, I'm lazy when it comes to tying my kids shoes. I tie little boys' and girls' shoes all day long at work. And it's okay. I really don't mind. But by the time I come home, I am done tying shoes. That, and I'm sympathetic to my girls' teachers and how many shoes they tie each day too. So I do my part and make it one less for them. The rule in our house is you can have tie shoes when you learn to tie them. Until then, it's VELCRO all the way! Hannah's been practicing, and so when it was decided she really needed new tennis shoes, I handed her mine first and told her to tie them. When she did it successfully, I announced she could pick out "tie shoes". She is SO proud of herself, and rightly so. She worked hard! Since getting them, she can even double-tie now. Do you think when she's grown I'll look back and wish I had the memory of tying her shoes over and over when she was little?? Naa..me either. Instead I'll remember her practicing to tie shoes by herself over and over and the huge smile on her face when she got it.

Me -

I have some job things going on. Good things, not bad. But things that are keeping me busy. As if I wasn't busy already! I got my score back on the first part of my National Boards that I completed last spring. I had a good score and I can "bank" it and not have to repeat that part of the boards! Big relief!! I also received a grant from the state to complete the rest of my National Boards. So, my portfolio for that is due March 31st. I'm giving myself December off worrying too much about it. There's so much going on already with Hannah's class, my class, Sadie's surgery, church, etc. and I want to enjoy this Christmas season with my kids. But, come January, I will be spending some serious time studying and working on my portfolio entries.

Christmas -

In the midst of all the business, I'm trying to stay centered and calm and remember what this season is all about. I'm really all about simple this year. Simple and meaningful Christmas celebrations. I have some fun things planned for us, and I'm letting go of some of the normal obligation-type things that don't hold real meaning for us. I'm trying to not overschedule our holidays, but provide plenty of down time to enjoy time as a family. Putting up the tree was fun this year, and for the first time, Hannah was actually a big help. Sadie - not so much, but hey, she's 3!

I also started doing advent devotionals with the girls right before bed. My good friend Becky led a workshop on advent traditions at our church a couple weeks ago, and last year she had actually introduced me to the way her family does a Jesse tree. So, we are trying it this year. The girls each have a small paper ornament with a symbol on it to color while I do the reading / devotional. Then we talk about it briefly. Then, they hang them on our Jesse tree (which is a small 3 foot artificial tree). The whole thing takes less than 10 minutes. Usually about 5. So far it's been great. Hannah has suprised me with how well she's been able to answer some of the questions and some of her ideas about the devotional. Sadie's just happy to be coloring a picture and hanging it on the tree. But that's why I like it - because it is 3-year old appropriate and 5-year old appropriate. (And appropriate for me as well!)

Today, we went to our local Christmas parade. It was fun and I hoped to get pictures, but the camera battery died. The girls racked up on the candy with huge bags full. Hannah, because she would run grab it when they threw it. Sadie..well, she had the act down. She would smile really cute and a little shyly at everyone going by. They thought she was too little and so they would actually leave the floats and run directly to her with huge handfuls of candy for her bag. It was too funny! Later that afternoon, we hit our friend Morgan's birthday party. It was a Webkinz party, so Hannah has now been introduced to the little critters. It was cute and the girls had a blast.

Well..is that enough rambling for one night? I think so. Good night and thanks for checking in on us!