Fried Rice and French Fries

Beautiful Children and God's Amazing Blessings

2012-01-23T00:08:00.005-06:00

Who are these kids? They come from places with names like Hubei, Hunan, Jiangsu, Guangdong, and others. Now they all live locally. All adopted from China. Some were "older child" adoptions. At least half were considered "special needs" adoptions by China. Heart defects, slow growth, limb differences, cleft lip and palate. These are just some of the needs represented here. And these needs have come into play in their lives in a variety of ways. Between them they have had numerous surgeries, speech therapy sessions, PT, OT, hearing and vision issues, and have visited specialists of almost every discipline in pediatric medicine. Some have needed only their local pediatrician. Some "obvious" needs have needed no interventions at all. Others have had "hidden" needs that have come up over the years, even if their adoption wasn't originally a "special needs" adoption. Many have had emotional needs to be addressed relating to attachment or fears or clinginess or adoption or being Chinese in various ways. Some of these children embrace being Chinese with everything inside them. Others prefer to just not discuss it at all. Still others have swung between these two or fall somewhere in the middle. Some are energetic and passionate and outgoing. Others are quieter and more reflective. But in reality, every one of the children in this picture had the exact same "special" needs: the need for a family, the need to belong, the need to be loved, the need to not be limited by their circumstances. Today these children are excelling in school. They play soccer and baseball. They take piano lessons. They are Girl Scouts. They take gymnastics and dance and sing in school or church choirs. They have learned to ride bikes and roller skate and go across the monkey bars. They are loved by moms, dads, sisters, and brothers. They have cousins and grandparents and uncles and aunts. They have families. They are loved, they are healthy, they are happy. They are beautiful children of God. So, yes..they are blessed.

But more than that, they *are* a blessing. They love big and generously. They teach me to love big and generously! They have expanded the hearts of all around them. They are survivors who have overcome more in their (2,3,4,5,6,7,8, or 9+) years than many adults. They show us what courage is. And Joy. They laugh with infectious joy. They cuddle up next to a parent on a Saturday morning. They reach a hand out to a little brother or sister to help. They giggle with one another as they attempt to use chopsticks to pick up chips. They make up games while the grown-ups talk. The older ones love on the little ones. The little ones look up to the older ones.

Many of these children don't actually know one another all that well. Due to time and busyness..some may only get together once or twice a year. Others see each other regularly at school. Some just met the day this photo was taken. But they are connected by shared experiences just as their families are connected by the experience of loving them. And it's my prayer that as they grow older and become "tweens and teens" (many approaching fast!), they will draw strength from that shared experience together. Tonight, I celebrate these children who make my world a better place. And I pray for the ones who still bear the label that *these* children are forever freed of: orphans. There are so many girls and boys just like these in China, in Uganda, in Hondurus, in the United States, and beyond. Please pray for them. Pray for them to find families. Pray for families to welcome them and love them. Pray for them to know their worth is not tied to the labels the world gives them, but to who their Father is.

Gung Hay Fat Choy! Happy New Year!

What I Know to be True

2012-01-16T19:13:00.004-06:00

This post is for me to remember more than anything else. You are welcome to read it if you'd like. (because of course if I didn't want anyone to read it, it would not be on a blog!) It's personal, but not private.

It's amazing how God whispers to us sometimes, and uses some of the most unlikely things. God has been whispering to me this week through several things including some sweet friends. But the most unusual thing He's been communicating through is a book series I read over Christmas break. It was The Hunger Games trilogy. Maybe you've heard of it - it's pretty popular these days I think. But it's not the type of book I'd normally be interested in or even try to read. ( I think it might actually be classified as a "young adult book" but shh..I read it anyway!! ha ha!) But I started the first one and found myself "sucked in" and had to finish it. Now, before you go out and buy it thinking it's going to change your life..don't. There's nothing theological or Christian about it. In fact, it's not a "feel good" book at all. If you read it, read it for the plot and the story, because that's probably all you'll get out of it.

*BUT*, there's a couple parts in the series where the main character is confused and distraught about things going on around her in the "game". And when she does, she uses a strategy someone taught her to "go back to what you know". In the moments of complete uncertainty, she repeats the things she knows to be completely true and unchanging. Sometimes, it's only her name and age that she can state. But whatever it is, she says what she *knows* to be true and from that gets a bearing on who she is.

I hadn't thought much about the book other than "that was interesting". But then this past week, I had a time of uncertainty myself. I took Sadie to the nephrologist (kidney dr.). What I knew before the visit was that she had 2 functioning kidneys - but in the wrong place. Her left kidney was in her pelvis and at last check, was on the small side. Her right was a little high and was a normal size. But in the two times she's been before, every bit of her lab work has come back completely normal. I was told her kidneys worked great and to "have a nice life and check back in every couple years". This past week was that "in a couple years" check-in. I was very laid-back about the whole thing because I expected to be told the same thing again. I expected it to be very routine. But it wasn't. It wasn't bad news. Her kidneys are doing okay. But it wasn't great news either.

From her ultrasound, I learned that her left kidney has not grown at all. It's in the 0 percentile for her age, height, and weight. It might be working a little, but not much if at all. The good news is her right kidney is compensating pretty well. It's growing great (83 percentile) and her dr. was happy about that. It's functioning pretty close to "normal", but not quite 100%. Her blood work showed that there's too much acid in her blood. (Kidneys among other things filter out the acid of the blood). Everything else was within normal limits. But that was enough to do two things. First, she has to take medicine daily now to correct that. Actually 3 times a day. Her dr. said he has had kids outgrow this before, but that she very well may need it the rest of her life. The second thing that did was bring her score on some measure that measures kidney function down just a little bit to the point where he wrote on her chart "Stage 1 renal insufficiency" which basically means "stage 1 chronic kidney disease". We didn't talk about that really..just the acidosis (acid in her blood). But I saw him write it as I was leaving and talking with his nurse. And I was still kind of wrapping my brain around the fact that they didn't say "looks great - see you in two years" and instead were writing a prescription for a long-term daily medicine. Of course I did what you shouldn't do and came home and googled. And what I found was more questions than answers. That doesn't really mean anything. It might mean that she has this issue with acid in her blood and that she may or may not have this issue all her life. and that's all. OR she could progress with a progressive loss of kidney function slowly over the years..into stage 2, and beyond. And that's scary stuff. But there is absolutely no way to know any answers at this point. All I can do is give her the medicine and take her back for her follow-up appointment in 1 year and see what her labs say then. Her dr. did tell me that this acidosis did not predict anything for the future. There are no symptoms in these early stages. And this is also why it's called a chronic disease. Ther's nothing acutely wrong..but it's a long term thing to watch and treat as needed. And I found this unsettling in the couple days after I received this news. Unsettling because of course I wanted to "fix" the problem, and I can't. In fact, I don't know how big of a problem it even is. So yeah, some uncertainty and worry about the future set in. And I have some sweet friends who I know are praying for Sadie, and for our family. That helps a lot. And then yesterday, I heard God whisper "Go back to what you know". And I remembered the book where the character stated what she knew to be absolutely true. So, that is what I am doing. I am stating what I know to be completely true.

I am loved by God. He has good plans for my life and future. He has been faithful and trustworthy in the past. He is still faithful and trustworthy. My daughters are loved by God. He has good plans for their lives and futures. God is able to do exceedingly more than I think or imagine. He did do exceedingly more than I could think or imagine to bring us together as a family. He put Sadie in our family (Hannah too!) in a way that I knew that I knew she was meant to be a part of us. There were so many possible obstacles and yet..nothing was an obstacle. He brought her to my attention when I wasn't even looking to adopt again just yet. He worked miracles with timelines, paperwork, and money. HUGE miracles. From a human standpoint, her adoption should have never happened. But it did. Because God is not limited by our circumstances. And because He put her in my family, he has given me everything I need to be her mother and to handle whatever is thrown at us. Regardless of how many specialists or doctors we see, or how many medications or surgeries or other treatments come our way. He has given Sadie a deep joy in life and a trusting, easy-going spirit and an unbelieveable ability to handle medical procedures with ease. (When the nurse asked if I was going to hold her down for the blood draw, Sadie looked at her like she was crazy and said "no. She doesn't have to hold me! I'm good at this!" And then she sat there at chatted with the nurse while she drew blood and never even flinched!). I also know that God led us to see a nephrologist in the first place.And he used an outstanding dr. to do it. NOTHING in Sadie's paperwork from china indicated kidney issues. She has had (and still has) no symptoms that would lead me to take her. But the adoption clinic dr. noticed on her first visit she had a teeny tiny "ear pit" on her left ear. (looks like a little freckle). And from that, she told me that *could possibly* indicate kidney issues..probably not..but why don't we get it checked out just to be sure. Amazing! That's what led us to our kidney dr. in the first place. And because he has been following her, he caught this very very early...and that could possibly help prevent further kidney damage. Regardless, God created Sadie and knit her together himself. He is not suprised. He knows exactly how big her kidneys are and what they can do and what cells are or are not working exactly right. And He is not limited by any of that.

That, is what I know to be true today. And today, that brings peace.

Shots and Toilets as Presents

2011-12-28T21:04:00.003-06:00

Just a quick little update on our "giving project" from Christmas (scroll down and read previous post if you're not sure what I'm talking about).
So, it went about like I thought..not much interest in the "giving gifts" on Christmas morning in the midst of the excitement. But yesterday we were able to talk about them more and they were very interested. They haven't picked out the place they want to help provide a well for yet. But they did each pick a gift out of the Compassion Catalog. They were very into it, especially Hannah. She read each description carefully and in the end chose "vaccinations". When I asked why, she said "because it says here kids die from diseases without them". So vaccinations it is. Then it was Sadie's turn. She debated long and hard between a soccer ball and a toilet. She finally chose toilet. (It was actually called "safe and sanitary bathroom" in the catalog. But she prefers to say she's buying a toilet.) When I asked why, her answer was amazingly thought-out, long, serious, and funny all at the same time. Only Sadie. :) She said "well, if a kid doesn't have a toilet, then he has to pee on the ground outside. And then a goat might eat the dirt with pee and get sick. Then the goat will burp in the kid's face and the kid will get a head-ache and then get sick. So a toilet helps kids not get sick." So, there you go..why every kid needs a toilet. :)

Christmas Ramblings

2011-12-19T00:55:00.007-06:00

This Christmas season my family has done a lot. Just like most other families I know. And quite honestly, everything we've done has been fun. But there's also a little tension - it's like we are living two different lives and celebrating Christmas two different ways. This post doesn't attempt to remove the tension. Rather, it's my attemp to think through some of it, with you along for the ride. :)

There's visiting Santa, and buying gifts, and making wish lists and parades and dance performances and school choir performances. There's dressing up to go see the Nutcracker, and creating Gingerbread houses. There's parties galore. And there's the elf. THE ELF. He has been responsible for much mischief, much clean-up on my part, and much giggles on the girls' part.

Then, there's our advent candles and the Nativity set, and talk of hope, joy, love, and peace. We tell the Christmas story and talk about Jesus' birthday. We look for opportunities to give to to others.

I've always thought the two could co-exist. And maybe they can. But there's still a tension. Even the kids feel it. My girls were both delighted to email Santa their wish lists. They have high hopes for Christmas morning. One moment Hannah will jump up and down with excitement and tell you she hopes that she gets an ipod and "dark grown-up lipstick" for Christmas. Then, when Sadie starts her wish list, Hannah interrupts her and says "But remember. .Christmas isn't about the gifts. It's about Jesus' birthday. Jesus is the most important gift". And while her words are true, the way she says it is the same way a whole group of kids will raise their hands and shout "Jesus!" in answer to any question asked during children's church before they even hear the question! Sadie's the same. One day early in the season I interrupted their talk of possible gifts and said "It's Jesus' birthday. What gifts will you give him?". And Sadie in all her innocent and sweetness said "I know, we'll give him LOVE!". And for those of you who don't know her - Sadie *is* one of the most loving people. She loves people and she loves Jesus. But even for her, it sounded like a cop-out answer. (I didn't tell her that!). But maybe that's because it's a cop-out answer I give too. I teach the kids to give and serve at Christmas. We put toys in the toys-for-tots box. We stick a dollar here and there in the Salvation Army red kettle. And then I have to buy the “real gifts” to see if we have any money leftover to donate to poor people somewhere else. And my girls who are happy to give and serve any other time of the year, want to know why they have to provide toys for other kids at Christmas, because "why can't Santa just bring them toys?". And in all my wisdom I answer in a mumble and change the subject.

But Jesus has interrupted my Christmas this year. It all started with reading a book called Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis. Her book is actually not about Christmas at all. It is about a God who interrupts our comfortable world and calls us to stop and really love the hurting and poor around us. Everywhere I've turned this advent, I've heard the same message. Stop. See the need. Love in real, practical ways.

I was so inspiried by what I was reading and hearing that I wanted Christmas to be a little different this year. I didn't want to just give lip-service to loving others. I didn't want us to just give our left-over change after all the "real gifts" had been bought. We still have the tension described above. But we are slowly making changes. On Christmas morning, my children will find gifts...good gifts that they wanted. They will jump up and down in excitement. But stockings this year will be different. Usually their stockings have an orange, candy, sometimes socks that they needed, and then a bunch of cheap things to take up the space that they don't really need and that they love for all of 5 minutes. But not this year. They will probably still find an orange (because what else do you put in the toe?) And a little candy. And Hannah might find her "grown up lipstick" she wants and Sadie will find something small she'd like too. And then, they will find two other gifts. I'd actually already bought a bunch of little stuff for their stockings at walmart and I actually took them back the other day for a refund. And then I used the money to buy them each a gift card from Living Water. http://www.water.cc Living Water builds wells and provides clean water to people in developing countries. It's a need my kids are familiar with already through church activities we've done in the past. And it's a critical need. Santa doesn't go around delivering clean water so people can live. Jesus uses us to do that. And they will also find a gift catalog from Compassion International where they can purchase a gift for a family in the developing world. Cool gifts like mosquito nets or soccer balls or a pig or goat.

This is how I predict this to go. They will see their presents and get very excited. Then they will dump their stockings. Sadie will immediately eat a couple pieces of chocolate and Hannah will squeal and put on the lipstick. Then they will briefly look at the catalog and gift card before returning to their other gifts. And that's okay. Because in a few days when the other gifts have lost the "newness" factor, we'll go online and redeem their gift cards. The girls will each get to choose the country and project they want their gift to go towards in providing clean water. Then, they can pick out a gift from the compassion catalog. Maybe they buy a pig for a family in Rwanda (by the way - I learned an average sow can give birth to up to 16 piglets a year..so the gift of a pig could mean a lifetime of income and food for a family). Or maybe mosquito nets for a family in India or a soccer ball for a kid in Uganda. My hope is, that this becomes a tradition and long after they've forgotten what they "got" for Christmas, they remember what they "gave". I'm super excited about this.

But I was kind of feeling off-kilter still with the whole Christmas thing. I mean what could I be missing? We've done everything. Shopping's done. Giving's done (or planned). Tree is decorated. Parades, parties, events..done or almost done. Nothing left to buy. Nothing left to plan. And then I went to church this morning. Towards the end of the music, we started to sing Angels We Have Heard on High. We got to the gloria in excelsis deo part and my heart remembered what was missing. I couldn't put it in words, but I teared up and just knew. Later this afternoon I looked the words to that song up. I needed to know the meaning of those words. Something about glory, I knew. It means "Glory to God in the Highest" - the very words the angels spoke to the shepherds in Luke. And slowly, my mind caught up with my heart. Worship. The gift of Christmas was Jesus, God's son. And the very first response to that gift wasn't another gift..not even to Jesus. The very first reponse to that gift was for the angels to worship and praise and give God glory "in the highest". Doesn't that mean above all else? With all I am? Jesus came and turned the world upside down. He turns our lives upside down. And to whom much is given, much is required. And I have been given much. But regardless of what that looks like at Christmas time or in regular day-to-day life, it starts with stopping, worshipping, and giving God glory and praise with all I have and all I am.

And now, because it's taken me 4 months to update the blog and because I'm quite sure I won't update it again until after Christmas, I will end this long post with a photo. I just love this one with all the missing teeth! Merry Christmas!!

Race and 7 / 8 Year Olds and Their Parents

2011-08-06T21:56:00.006-05:00

Well, this post could very well get me in hot water with some people. But it's been on my heart the last couple days and I'm just going to say it anyway.

Racism exits today. Here, right where you are. And not talking about it doesn't make it go away. And I'm kind of naive I guess, because my kids are still young. So I haven't seen racism in them or their friends. (maybe others have, but I haven't). No, I've seen curiosity about race, and kids trying to understand race. But I haven't seen what I would consider racism. And maybe as a white person that doesn't face racism in my daily life, I'm not qualified to judge what is racism. But I'm just saying..I don't see it in the kids..much. (There was once..but the little girl was young. And even though it sounded mean-spirited, she was lucky to have people who cared about her and others enough to set her straight on some things. And the adults around her used the opportunity to teach respect for all people. And so I choose to believe it was just not knowing and understanding). I do see it in the parents. (Thankfully not in most parents..but in just enough that's it's made me sit up and notice). Let me try to explain, using my own kids, well one of them anyway. I kind of get a weird window into the world..because my kids and I are a different race from each other.

When Hannah was little, she explained race by skin color, but not in the terms we adults use. It was more like "your skin is light brown, well not even brown. My skin is medium brown. My friend so and so's skin is dark brown. It's not black though, even though someone said it was black". See, innocent. One day she came home from after-school care in kindergarten and asked me "mom, what team am I on?". (I said Alabama - roll tide! just kidding!). I asked what she meant. She said "am I on the white team or the black team?". I was a little concerned - and was ready to head down to her school (that I LOVE) and ask why on earth they were dividing kids into teams for games based on race!! But because I know her school and know that would not be tolerated, I figured I must be missing something. So, I asked a few more questions first. (always a wise choice where my kids are involved) And it turns out - there were no teams. Hannah was just trying to figure out where she fit in in a world where it seemed like everyone else was either white or black. There were no organized teams..but she was asking "am I supposed to play with the white kids or the black kids? Where do I belong?". And I've learned that - kids categorize. It's a developmental skill..not meanness. Kids with curly hair / straight hair, boys / girls, 2nd grader / 1st graders, black / white. I asked "are you trying to figure out if you're white or black?". She said yes. So I responded "neither". And then I tried to explain that she was Asian..and that was it's own race and she wasn't white or black and she should play with whoever she wanted or whoever looked like they needed a friend.

It's taken a long time for Hannah to understand there are many races and nationalities and ethnicities in the world. She tried for a while to put everyone into: white, black, asian. (because kids categorize. And honestly, I think a great many kids do this - though most probably leave out the asian. But Hannah's just more verbal about it than most). Well, asian = chinese to her for a while. And slowly, as she occassionally met people that were Korean or Vietnamese or Indian (from India) she began to understand that "Asian" incorporated more than "Chinese". (And the reason we met people who were all these other ethnicities was simply that when Hannah saw someone who looked asian, she marched up and said "hey, are you Chinese?". She still does actually..but now she's starting to say "you look asian..are you Chinese or another kind of asian?".

Another thing Hannah did for a long time is group Hispanic people into the category "Asian". Their skin color was often more similar to hers than it was to a person who was black or white. The earliest I remember this is when Hannah was 4 (before we travelled to get Sadie), a lady who looked hispanic was jogging down our street. Hannah glanced at her and said very matter-of-factly "I think that's my birth mother!". I was pretty much like "um, I'm quite sure it's not. For MULTIPLE reasons". And so we began talking about there were people that were hispanic and that was different from asian, even though skin color could be similar. Now actually, Hannah is learning that not all Hispanic people come from Mexico..but from other places as well. When Hannah plays at the park, she will often walk up to a child there that looks hispanic and say "Hey..I speak Chinese, do you speak Spanish?". Kind of funny in that she actually doesn't speak Chinese (at least not above the level she could learn from watching Nihao Kai-lan cartoon! And she probably knows as many Spanish words as Chinese). But she shows no hesitation in asking about race or ethnicity. She's proud to be Chinese and she figures everyone else should be proud to be whatever they are and be ready to talk about it.

It may seem like we talk about race a lot - and well I guess we do. Not just strictly race..but race, ethnicitity and nationality. Not an everyday conversation..but it comes up. Hannah drives a lot of that..she's interested and has questions. (Sadie on the other hand never brings it up.). I think some of it comes from the fact that Hannah doesn't see her race reflected as the majority hardly ever. And unlike some other minorities, she doesn't even see her race reflected as the majority in her church, or her family. That's not a bad thing..it just is. (But it's also why I liked her being a part of Camp China last weekend - scroll down). And Hannah seems comfortable with that..but she's also observant and has questions. Hannah is also old enough that she's studied Martin Luther King, Jr.and a little bit about civil rights in school. She is completely outraged at the idea of segregation. (She also wanted to know if she lived in the United States during segregation where she would go to school.) She thinks Ruby Bridges is very cool (Black child who was the first to integrate her school after Brown vs. Board of Eduation). So, yeah. We talk about race a lot in our family. It's been a learning cuve for both of us in how to do that in ways that are respectful and honoring to everyone.

Contrast that with the way I've heard race talked about among adults in the past and this week. (and this is where I may step on some toes!) Last year Hannah was in a class that included some students who were hispanic. I don't know how many exactly..but more than a couple. And the same is true this year. And there are several classrooms in the school that have a significant number of hispanic children. Beautiful, bright children whose parents want them to learn and grow and develop and have fun and make friends. Kind of like what we all want for our kids. And sadly, I have heard more than one parent "grumble" about their child being placed in a room with those kids. Comments like "Did you see the list of names? I can't pronounce half of them. Great! (sarcastic great!)" or "Who is my child going to be friends with - I mean with the nationality of the other kids?". "There is no one my daughter can be friends with in this class" (based ONLY on the names of the kids. Not meeting them. Not even seeing them!! )Seriously. And I've heard other comments too. A couple comments were said directly to me. Because I was white and the other parent was white so I must agree, right? And actually at least two times that I know of (only once this year) I've said "well, my child is not white either" and the other parent looked at me like "oh, duh! I forgot!". So, okay.. this is not the majority of people I know. It's actually only a couple conversations I've had plus a couple relayed to me. But I've just heard a little "grumbling" on this topic over the years. And I have to think there's more going on..or at least being thought. So, if your child is in a class like mine..here's my experience / thoughts for what it's worth:

* Be glad! Your child will be enriched by it.

* The vast vast majority of the kids of other nationalities in our schools speak English. Really, they do. I've sat at the tables with them at lunch. I've visited their class. I've taught them. There may be one who doesn't here and there..but they learn "playground english" fast. (not a real term - my words). The kids who get ESL help especially after kindergarten,(for the most part) need help with academic language..langauge on tests, in textbooks, etc. But your child absolutely can play with them on the playground just fine. And even if there's a child who doesn't speak English - kids figure out how to communicate. Don't worry.

* Your child will not be the "only" white child in his / her class. At least at my school. Actually, far from it.

* Even IF your child were to end up being the only white child in his / her class - it would be fine. There are many children across the world who have survived being the only child of their race / nationality in a class. My child is one of them.

* Your child will learn in this class. The teacher will teach in English and will teach your child the same thing other kids of this age are learning in their classes. Your child's education will not be harmed, but will be enriched. And my secret observation here: In many schools (though not all I concede) the classrooms with kids who may need a little extra help (such as classrooms with kids who have disabilities or classrooms with kids who need ESL support) tend to have some of the strongest teachers. That will be a benefit to your child too.

* You might have to discuss race with your child. It's not so hard. But as kids begin categorizing, observing, and trying to make sense of the world - we definately have to model respect. But sometimes we have to verbalize it as well. For example: Hannah knows what racism is. We've explicity talked about it. It started when she was learning about civil rights at school, but also she had someone who wouldn't let her do something because she wasn't born in America. (but that was the young child mentioned earlier where it was actually used by the adults around as a teaching moment and I believe was handled well). She's young and still working on the understanding, but she can give you a very simple definition. "If someone doesn't want to play with you because you're not playing fair, or because they have someone else they're playing with, or because they want to do something else, or they just want to be alone - that's not racism. They just don't want to play. But if they won't play with you because of what you're skin looks like or where you're from - that's racism". She will also tell you that it's not okay to make fun of what people look like or where they are from, and that it's not okay to sing songs that make places other people are from sound bad because it might hurt someone's feelings.

* Your child's life will be enriched by having friends that are different, whether "different" in your child's case means white, black, hispanic, asian, child with disabilities, or what. One of Hannah's good friends in her class last year was hispanic. And it was that little girl that actually stood by Hannah when someone else wasn't being so nice. Hannah's friends have included kids with disabilities, especially in years she was in an inclusion class. (which is not about race..but it is about respect for everyone).

* Your child is looking and listening to you for help in figuring out this world. And when you are looking at class lists and dropping off school supplies this week, your child might just be noticing any grumbling, sighing, or whispered "do you see these names?" comments. In contrast, your child might also be paying attention to your genuine "wow - looks like a great class. I think you'll have a great year!" And if you teach your child respect for everyone..she might just learn to respect herself and stand up for herself when needed too - because she also is a person of great worth in this world.

I realize my perspective as a white parent with asian daughters may be a little unique. I honestly seek out diversity for her. But I'm thankful for that unique perspective and I *hope* I would feel the same way if my children were white. I honestly believe I would because this gets down to what I believe about my faith as well..belief that each person is a unique and valuable creation of God. You know "Jesus loves the Little Children" and "Love your neighbor as yourself" You can't love people you don't take the time to get to know. And by no means do we do this perfectly. Far from it actually. But what I know is this: For our family, we are enriched by all the people we do know, and particularly all the people my children know. In Hannah's girl scout troop, I think the black girls outnumber the white girls. At Camp China, Hannah gets to be the majority - a group of 17 girls in her age group..all Chinese. At school, probably 1/3 of the class is Hispanic. Her teacher has an Asian painted umbrella in her class, as well as Native American items (which is a culture that is an interest to her teacher). And you know what? It's going to be a great year!!

Camp China!

2011-08-01T20:09:00.011-05:00

This past weekend we took a LONG drive to Black Mountain, NC for our first visit to Camp China. Camp China is a weekend family camp for families who have children from China.Those of you who know my children probably know that Hannah particularly is all about everything China. I'm very thankful she is proud to be from China and I want to encourage that in both girls. We hope to return to visit China one day, but in the meantime, we had "Camp China". The girls and I had a blast and hope to be able to go back next year.

We joined about 50+ other girls from China and their families for a fun weekend of games, Chinese dance, Chinese art, swimming, s'mores around a campfire, new friends, and more. Morning activities were split with the kids in their age-group classes with counselors and teachers while parents had workshops and a guest speaker. (And maybe even a nap!). Sunday featured Kay Bratt, author of Silent Tears: a Journey of Hope in a Chinese Orphanage, as the speaker for the adults. She was a great speaker with a very inspiring message. Then, after lunch, families had some free time for swimming, playing in the creek, resting,etc., folowed by family activities. Saturday we went to a cooking class and learned to make a cold noodle dish. Sunday we painted Chinese umbrellas and decorated picture frames. The evenings varied. Friday evening was the welcome campfire, s'mores, and games. Saturday evening was a movie for the kids with crafts for the adults. (Kids had crafts in their morning classes). I tried out calligraphy and Chinese knot tying. Sunday evening was the closing ceremony complete with a talent show, showing off what they learned in Chinese Dance class, and a dragon parade. Both my girls were in the talent show. Hannah did a dance she made it up - it was really beautiful! Sadie told knock-knock jokes. They were hilarious! Not because the jokes were funny, but actually because well, they weren't funny at all but she thought they were. And she was just too dang cute as she boldly marched to the stage, took the microphone, told her jokes, and then laughed at her own made-up jokes. Everyone else couldn't help laughing too. (so of course now she thinks her jokes are the best and she's going to be a comedian - or "joker" as she calls it - when she grows up!) All-in-all a very fun weekend. To me the value of the weekend was not in the kids learning about Chinese culture. The real value was in just hanging out with so many other kids just like them. And also in hanging out with the teenage and young adult counselors and the adult teachers. They were also Asian (mainly Chinese). All the girl counselors were adopted from China as well. (The guy counselors were asian, but not necessarily adopted). The counselors were awesome- even spending time hanging out with the kids during what was supposed to be their free time, giving piggy back rides, and more. It was neat to see how the little girls looked up to them. Sometime Saturday as we were headed to our room, Hannah said "mom, almost everyone here is Chinese! Except the parents!". Here's some pictures from our weekend.

This was a cooking class! The cooking instructor took some time out of teaching us to pose with some of the counselors who walked through after playing a game of counselor paint-tag.

Sadie and a new friend mixing up ink for calligraphy

Hannah painting her umbrella

Hannah dancing for talent show

Sadie takes the microphone for knock-knock jokes

Just hanging out with new friends

Closing Ceremony

Prison: How to Help

2011-07-26T09:48:00.002-05:00

Okay, well, I tried to put this all in one long post and apparently blogger thought I was a bit too long-winded. So here's what I cut out of the previous post. Don't forget to scroll down and read the post before this.

Following is a re-post (slightly edited) that I originally posted last year. But it's time again. So, in case you missed my thoughts on why I go to prison, here they are.Before I get to that though, I will be going to prison again September 8-11, this time for a full Kairos weekend of 3.5 days. This is exciting for us because it's the first time in several years we have been able to do the full weekend there. We will be welcoming 36 residents (what we call the inmates) into the Kairos community. These are ladies who are in prison but who have not yet been involved in any of our weekends or retreats. We will be listening, loving, praying, sharing, singing, worshipping, eating, laughing, and probably crying too together for 3.5 days. And God will do amazing things, I am sure. We'd love to have your help. Contact me if you want more info on how to help. Some of the things we need include:

* Prayers - If you tell me you are praying for us, your name will go on a strip of paper and be added to our prayer chain. Think of the paper chains you might have made as a child. That's what it's like, except every chain link represents one person who is praying. We circle the prison chapel with the prayer chain and it's a very visual representation to the women that they are not forgotten. It's amazing to witness the chain come out and their reactions.

* Donations - Just $5 provides a meal for one of our residents. And $125 sponsors one resident for the entire weekend. (And it's tax deductible). Contact me for more information.

* Placemats - this is a great project for children's sunday school classes. We need sets of 36 placemats decorated by children. Children should put only their first name and age.

* Expressions of love and encouragement - write sets of 36 identical letters of encouragement (they can be addressed to "Dear sister in Christ"). Or provide 36 encouraging bookmarks (identical). Or provide 36 copies of a poem or inspiration thought. No stickers, glue, etc.

*Make a dozen homemade cookies. Or provide a couple bags of "salties" such as potato chips, cheese puffs, pork skins (very loved there!).

Okay - scroll down and read the post below this for why I go. Or click this link.
http://deette530.blogspot.com/2011/07/why-i-go-to-prison-updated-repost.html

Why I Go to Prison - an updated repost

2011-07-25T22:52:00.007-05:00

Okay..here's the original, slightly edited post.

I drive a lot for work. My car and I travel a lot of county roads. Occasionally I pass crews of men or women who are in prison and are out cleaning up the roads. Sometimes they are city or county jail crews – usually given away by the orange jumpsuits. But sometimes I also see white clothing with the familiar black letters on the back (DOC). Department of Corrections. State prisoners. Many years ago, I just drove by them without a 2nd thought. I didn’t actually think badly of them. No, my attitude was almost worse. I simply didn’t think of them at all. They had nothing to do with me or what I was doing or where I was going. They were “other”, not like me and not a part of me.

That all changed in 2001. One Sunday morning I was walking in the door of my church when I was greeted by a friend who said, “Hey! I’m going to lead a Kairos weekend in September and I’d love for you to help. Are you interested?” I said, “Sure, I’d love to!” I then entered the church and thought “Oh crap! What did I just do??? I didn’t mean that!”See, my friend was very involved in prison ministry at our state women’s prison a couple hours away. Kairos was the name of the ministry she was involved in. I’d just told her that I’d love to minister in prison! Um, yeah. That wasn’t really my “thing” back then. I’d never even considered the idea. Up until that point, I’d volunteered with different groups of people. Kids mainly. Kids were my “thing”. I’m a teacher and I love kids. But adults in general weren’t my “thing” and especially adults in prison. I got nervous. What would I say to someone in prison? How could I relate to them? I thought prison ministry was a good thing for someone else to do, but not me! I had actually sent cards to some men in prison as part of a project before. But to talk to them, sit with them, spend a weekend with them? What was I thinking?! Actually I wasn’t thinking. My mouth said yes before my brain could engage in a debate. And while I generally can say “no” pretty well, I’m very thankful that in that instance, I said “yes”. I don’t exactly know why I didn’t ever go back to my friend and say “hey, I made a mistake and I meant no”, except that I started listening to God. And somehow, this started seeming “right”.

It's now 10 years later and I’ve been in that prison numerous times. Maybe 5 times for full Kairos weekend retreats (3.5 days each), 5 times for shorter 2-day follow-up retreats, and more times than I can count for monthly reunions lasting a couple hours. Somewhere between a Thursday night in September and the following Sunday afternoon back in 2001, prison ministry became my “thing”. My fears? Irrelevant in the face of what God was doing. You know what I learned about relating to people in prison? They are people. And just like me and you, those ladies are people of great worth. The woman wearing that white DOC uniform and I are the same in God’s eyes. We have the same fears, hopes, and dreams. We have both made mistakes. We have both sinned. We are both in need of God’s grace and forgiveness. God loves me intensely with an amazing love. God loves her just as intensely with just as much amazing love. True, I have not committed a crime that could end me up in prison. But have I committed crimes in my heart? Have I gone against what God wanted me to do at times? Yes, it’s part of being human. But God’s grace is there for me, and it’s there for the women (and men) in prison as well. And because of that, I can relate to the ladies there as sisters..sisters in Christ. It’s a really, really beautiful thing.

It’s a beautiful thing, but it’s not always easy. Kairos’ mission is to “bring Christ’s love to the incarcerated, their families, and those who work with them”. It’s tough sometimes. Because even though God sees us as his children, equally loved, the world doesn’t always see that way. And the world passes that message on to us, and to them. Sometimes I have to fight through a temptation to think that in some way I’m “better than” my sister wearing white who is sitting across from me. More often, I fight the opposite temptation to think that I’m “not good enough” to make a difference. And sometimes our new friends, they struggle with those things too. They struggle to impress us, make us think they’re “better than”, “tougher than”, etc. Or, they struggle with thinking they’re not good enough, don’t’ deserve God’s love, etc. It’s not just the relationships inside the prison that are tough. Our relationships with other team members aren’t always easy either. We’re a pretty diverse bunch: we are young, older, black, white, from big churches, small churches, and different denominations. We disagree with each other at times. Sometimes we hurt one another’s feelings, even if unintentionally. Sometimes, we just plain irritate and frustrate each other. But God’s grace covers us all and because of that we learn to pray together, listen to each other, forgive, and love. It helps that we also sing together, eat together, and laugh together. God shows up, and lives are transformed right before my eyes, every time. Sometimes, it’s even my life that gets transformed as I learn a little more each time about what God’s heart looks like in the world.

One of my favorite "snapshots" of ministry there is the way we often close reunions or retreats. We all gather in a circle in that small, simple chapel. Nothing fancy - just a cross and a Bible. Very diverse women whose only common denominator is Christ. Women who have shared our lives over the past hours or days. Our team of women in jeans and colorful t-shirts interspersed with women in white uniforms. We all join hands together and sing a song proclaiming that there is only one God, only one King, and only one Body (of Christ) and asking God to bind our hearts together with his love. I’m not a big crier. But that moment gets me every time. I feel a lump in my throat and my eyes tear up as I look around that circle while we all praise the God who unites us. I imagine that feeling of unity and peace and love is just a taste of what heaven feels like. Who knew that when I said yes to prison ministry, I was saying yes to getting a glimpse of heaven?

Now, when I pass work crews with those white uniforms and “DOC” on the back, I notice. They are no longer “other” and their lives matter very much to me. And actually, so do the lives of those in the orange county / city jail uniforms. They matter too. I think about them and about the others those uniforms represent. I slow down just a little and as I pass by, I whisper a prayer of God’s peace, protection, and guidance on their lives. Just maybe, next time you pass one of those crews, you’ll sense a little nudge too…to notice them, to slow down just a little, and to whisper a prayer.

**If you want to be added to our prayer chain, or help in another way, leave a comment, e-mail me, or send me a FB message.

Spring Highlights

2011-07-13T21:43:00.016-05:00

So, my sweet friend Laine recently reminded me I haven't updated since March. Well, we've been having lots of fun this summer, but you'll have to wait to read about summer. A brief look back at spring. Or at least the spring happenings (post spring-break) that I have pictures for. Because 1. It's more interesting anyway if there's pictures and 2. How am I supposed to remember what we did back in March - May if I don't have a picture of it. :-) So..here you go..Spring 2011: The Highlights.

Makeup. Sadie has quite the style don't you think?

Teeth. Actually I think Hannah lost one or two more to equal who knows how many (7 she says). Sadie has lost 3. But this was her first.

Easter Egg Hunt and Fun (Sadly, I forgot my camera for Easter Sunday though)

Girl Scout Camp. Hannah went for 2 nights with her troop and had a blast!

Sadie's 3rd Family Forever Day. My how this little girl has grown and changed. She is a joy every day!! These were here "gotcha day" clothes. Which 3 years later actually fit her for the first time instead of swallowing her up.

Tornado Relief Boxes. As everyone in our state knows, our state was ravaged my multiple deadly tornadoes April 27th. It was truly heartbreaking and like most, we just had a need to "do something". We donated supplies. But we needed to participate hands-on. So the girls and I, along with other families from our church, made these "boxes of hope" to be delivered to children all across the state who were effected by the tornadoes. If you don't live in my state you may not realize it, but there's still a lot of devastation and damage and hurting people in places even almost 3 months later. There's rebuilding and hope too..but keep the people who were affected in your prayers - some of them have a very long road to recovery ahead.

Soccer

Dance Recitals - both girls did a great job in their year-end dance recitals and looked so incredibly cute too!! And Hannah was awarded a dance scholarship for next year to boot. Whoo hoo! Happy News!!

Hannah's 5th Family Forever Day. Hard to believe it's been 5 years since this sweet, spunky girl made me a mom. We couldn't do gotcha day clothes pictures this year - It's the first year she hasn't managed to squeeze into them. But we celebrated by going out for her favorite Chinese noodles. This girl can eat some noodles!

And there you have it..the cliff notes version of Spring. Look for "Summer Happenings" soon. Maybe by Christmas. :-)

Lessons from Prison

2011-03-28T18:35:00.009-05:00

I went to prison again this weekend. Sweet, blessed time. I love my Kairos sisters - those inside and outside that prison. So many thoughts and images and "snapshots" of the weekend are swirling around in my head. Can't quite process them all yet. But here's a taste of what I experienced.

65 Kairos sisters who praised Jesus, sang together, prayed together, ate together, listened, and loved together. About 54 of them were "sisters in white" who live at Tutwiler and wear standard Dept. of Corrections white uniforms - some for a few years, and a few for a lifetime. The other 11 were our outside team - and we ourselves are pretty diverse bunch! We come from different denominations, different races, different experiences, just different. Yet - the same too. Only God can create that kind of unity.

A conversation and prayer time with one of my sisters in white who will live out the rest of her lifetime in that place. And as we shared and prayed, I looked into her eyes and saw sadness and yet joy too. A joy greater than many I know. The sadness came when she talked about life here and now. The joy came when she talked about the life to come and about meeting Jesus face to face. And the joy came too when she talked about all the people she was determined would also come to know Jesus. Her whole face lit up. And I was hit with a sense of divine. And for a moment, I realized we were glimpsing eternity - when she and I and so many others would live and walk side-by-side forever. I don't know how to explain it. It wasn't an emotional moment, or a long moment. Just a brief sense of "yes. this is what it's about". But it was a Holy moment.

Another conversation with a woman who has lost her kids. And she tearfully asked me "do you think my baby boy will remember me?". ouch. Because despite everything else. Depsite what they've done, what environment they lived in, everything else, the mothers are still mothers in their hearts. They may not be able to care for their kids now, and some of them may not have been able to care for their children even before they came to prison. But they did (and do!) love them. They never stop loving them.

A quote I heard on a break "Our government has a choice to make. If they don't spend more money on schools now, they will just have to spend more money on prisons later". She should know - she's living there now.

A discussion after one of our talks. One woman shared her struggle to live a Christian life in that place. She compared her heart to having a robe on and every time she messes up, it leaves a hole in it. So she prays, asks for forgiveness, tries harder, and patches the hole up. And no sooner does she get the hole patched up, then she trips and makes another mistake and gets another hole. She can't keep up. And our table group tells her almost at the same time - quit patching up that robe!! Just exchange it for a brand new one!! That's the promise of Jesus - a new heart!

Sunday morning church. I go to a great church - with people I love, great music, great teaching, and great worship! I love my church! But when it comes to the places I've felt the most freedom and pure joy in worship - it comes in 2nd. (or maybe even 3rd - but that might be a story for another day). But first place goes to a very simple chapel in the midst of a place of hurt, shame, and darkness. That little chapel at Tutwiler with very little resources is proclaiming the good news and changing lives. And the worship there is pure, real, free, and joyful! It's awesome!!

So much more - some of which are miracles and insights that aren't mine to tell. But now I'm home, and content, and challenged at the same time. Content to be home, happy to be with my family, and really tired. But also challenged to reach out for more ministry, more blessings, more joy, more boldness, more freedom, and more authentic living - to live out in my day-to-day life outside those prison walls the very things that seem to come so easily inside them.

A Visit to Ivy Green

2011-03-15T18:44:00.011-05:00

We took a mini-vacation for spring break. We started it yesterday and ended it today. Short, but sweet. We drove to Florence yesterday and we got checked in our hotel mid-afternoon. It started raining as soon as we got there and rained all night. Didn't matter. We relaxed and did this:

Swimming in the indoor pool and hanging out at the hot tub

Manicures: (They're supposed to be showing off their nails - not sure what exactly Sadie is doing with that scowl!)

Dinner at a "fancy restaurant" with live music and a visit to the hotel's game room. (no pictures)

A complimentary "cheese and fruit tray" (thanks to friends!) while we watched "The Miracle Worker" movie.

This morning, the girls and I enjoyed room service breakfast, another quick trip to the pool and hot tub, and a little more relaxing. Then we headed out for Tuscumbia to visit Ivy Green, the birth place of Helen Keller. Hannah did a "famous American" project on her when she was in kindergarten and has been interested ever since. I've also loved the stories of her and her teacher Anne Sullivan ever since I was a child. So, Hannah and I were very excited to go. Sadie? The highlight for her was sticking her finger up the nose of a statue of Helen. Seriously - she thought that was hilarious. But anyway, it was a really neat tour. The ladies who ran it and gave the tour were very "child-friendly" in their approach - giving tidbits the kids would especially find interesting along with the parts geared towards adults. And it was short enough to hold Hannah's attention. (Not so much Sadie, but she tried!) Most of the furniture in the house is the original furniture. The floors are original, as well as Helen's clothing we saw and some 100 year old quilts made by her aunt. One interesting thing was the house was not near as big as I thought it would be. It's a nice size for a family, but nothing like the house pictured in the movie. At the end of the tour, we were invited to walk around the house and the grounds. There was also a small museum in one of the rooms that housed many of her braille book collections, gifts given to her by people all over the world, photographs, and one of her old braille writers.

The entrance to Ivy Green

The house where her family lived

Helen and Anne's bedroom. There's a larger bed you can't see.

Some of Helen's and her mother's dresses, hanging in her parents' room

The dining room. These dishes are the original dishes and are what's left of the set. Helen broke most of the dishes in her temper tantrums before she began to learn to communicate. She also not only locked her teacher in her room once (like in the movie), but also locked her mother in the pantry too.

The cottage where Anne took Helen to teach her

One of the girls' highlights - checking out the braille books

One of many garden areas around the house

THE pump - the pump where Helen first understood that words had meaning and could be used to communicate.
This is where she understood that w-a-t-e-r meant water, the wet stuff coming out. Where the light came through the darkness and she understood for the first time. Once she "got it", she really took off. By the end of that day, she had learned the words for 30 things. Amazing! It was my favorite part. For Hannah, it was close between the pump and the braille books. But she reenacted the entire scene at the water pump from the movie. And I'm sorry I don't have a picture of Sadie's favorite part. But I had already asked her to please get her finger out of Helen Keller's nose before I thought to grab my camera. :-)

After we left Ivy Green, we headed right down the road to Spring Park, a really pretty park with waterfalls, ducks, a nice playground, and some cool attractions that weren't open yet this season. But the walk around was nice and the girls enjoyed the ducks.

And then we headed home. I'm thinking we might need to do a few more of these mini-vacations. It was the perfect chance to relax, not spend too much, and not get everyone so tired from a big trip.

The Post Where God Meets Me in Piles of Clothes!

2011-03-01T00:00:00.003-06:00

I just finished a great book called "One Thousand Gifts". (See www.onethousandgifts.com) The book is incredible, very poetic, and very moving. And I absolutely will not do it justice in this quick-typed post at midnight. So read it for yourself. I downloaded it on the kindle pretty inexpensive. But the author is challenged by a friend to name 1000 gifts from God. She begins keeping a journal and noting the gifts. A grattitude journal, so to speak. But as she does this it takes her deeper into the heart of God than she ever imagined as she learns to see God and see grace in all things. Not just in big things, but small things. Not just in good things, but in suffering and trials and hard things too. Take my word for it - read the book. She has an amazing way with words.

I've starting keeping my own journal of gifts. It's not near as poetic. But, today I added #123: "oodles and oodles of clothes! mounds of clothes! Clothes to fill closets and clothes to give away!" Seems that God has a lesson for me today in clothes. Clothes represent grace to me today. Clothes are grace today. God provides. God blesses. But to receive more blessings, the first blessings must flow through me. I can't keep my hands wrapped tight around them - for if my hands are wrapped tight around my blessings, my hands can not be open to receive more blessings.

What does this have to do with clothes? Glad you asked. :-) Everyone knows that if you have kids, there are just some things you have to do. You have to feed them. You have to clothe them. It just comes with the job description. After almost 5 years with Hannah and almost 3 years with Sadie - I can tell you that I don't have to buy my kids clothes. Hardly ever. (Now grandma buys clothes from time to time. Just because she likes to!) That doesn't mean I don't occassionally buy them something new just because I like it or because they like it. But that's pretty rare. But never fear, they do not feel deprived at all. And they are not. They are blessed. We are blessed. Before I adopted Hannah, I had a few families I know bring me bags and bags of clothes for her. Plus, there were some shower gifts of clothing. Hannah had FULL drawers and a closet before I ever traveled to China. When she outgrew a few things, I passed them on to a friend. But then, I was in another adoption process with Sadie. And so I wondered, maybe I shouldn't pass on so many clothes. What if I need them later for Sadie? So I started keeping them. But when I got Sadie, she was significantly smaller than Hannah had been. I thought I might have to actually buy her some clothes. But instead, we had *more* friends donate clothes in the size we needed. And I kept the clothes Hannah outgrew, and was outgrowing. Because, one day Sadie would be big enough to wear them! Actually, now at 5.5 years old, Sadie is wearing some of the clothes Hannah wore at 3. Finally!
But, long story short, we continually have people bring us clothes. Not continually as in "all the time". But at least 1-2 times a year someone will stop me at church, or at work, and say "hey, I have bag of clothes in the car for you". About twice a year, I go through all the kids clothes. Anything too small for Sadie gets donated to a friend with a smaller child. Anything that fits her - she gets to keep. Anything that's in between Sadie and Hannah's size - I put in a box in Sadie's closet for "later". Anything that fits Hannah - she gets to keep. Anything too big for Hannah - I put in a box in her closet for "later". Well, before I knew it - we were being overrun by clothes! What a great problem to have. But, um, I literally couldn't stuff any more clothes in the drawers. And the boxes in the closet for "later" were stuffed. And I had two HUGE drawers in my room that were stuffed with girls' clothes. And MY closet was slowly being taken over by the dresses that didn't fit the girls now but would later! And the more clothes you have, the more laundry you have. Even if they only wear the same 5 shirts over and over! Because some how other clothes end up in the dirty clothes or stuffed in corner somewhere until you find them and then they are dirty. So as I was going through clothes this time (because we're having an early spring it seems! We needed spring clothes out! yippee!), I was finally like "SAVE ME FROM ALL THESE CLOTHES!! THEY ARE TAKING OVER MY HOUSE!". Hmm. What was meant to be a blessing, and what started out as a blessing, starts to become a burden. It hit me that perhaps I was beeing a bit greedy. I didn't think so at the time. I wasn't buying lots of clothes. In fact, I rationalized, I was saving so much money by not buying clothes that I could then use that money for other things - good things even like how about the fact that we sponsor two children through Compassion International. What could have been our "clothing budget" instead goes to our sponsor children. True. But really, does Hannah need 35 short-sleeve t-shirts? Or how about Sadie's 30 short sleeve t-shirts in each size from now through middle school? I'm exagerating..but only slightly I'm embarrased to say! But really, if God is providing for us now, won't he still be providing in 5 years too? Even if we don't keep it all for now? How about especially if we don't keep it all for now! I mean, if Sadie reaches the age of 10 and all of a sudden there's no box of clothes waiting for her, she'll still have clothes! I can buy clothes. A teacher salary might not be extravagant, but it really is enough to meet basic needs. I just think it's really cool that I haven't *had* to purchase many clothes for the girls. But if I had to, I could. And if I couldn't, wouldn't God provide in some way? So, I decided to stop the insanity of the clothing monstor in our house. We have filled up multiple garbage bags of clothes. Some clothes are going to friends. Others are going to the thrift store. Only a small percentage of the clothing we are donating is things Sadie has outgrown. There's a lot that still fits her that's going. And some that still fits Hannah. And some that's in between their sizes. And some that's too big for Hannah. They no longer have 35 t-shirts! Or too-many dresses, or 15 pairs of leggings. But they have enough. Really, more than enough. We still have the boxes of clothes for them to grow-into. But only a size bigger than what they are now. But they are not overflowing. And their clothes are not taking over the house. And hopefully, those mutiple bags of clothes will bless someone else. And yeah, I'm not just donating *their* clothes. I've started going through mine too. That's not a finished project yet.

If you happen to be one of our sweet friends who donates clothing to us - THANK YOU! Thank you for blessing our family with your gifts! We DO appreciate and love the gifts! And feel free to continue as your children outgrow things. :-) But we will be more selective of what to keep. We won't have 5 years of clothes to grow into waiting. We will pass on to others the blessings. Now that the clothes are bagged up waiting to be delivered, we'll actually have room to receive.

And that's really what this post is about. Not clothes. It's about making room to receive God's grace. It's always there. Always being given to us. But when our hands are closed so tightly around the blessings and we don't want to share, we don't have room to receive more. Love given is multiplied. When we let go, our hands are open to receive the grace God wants to give next. Not 1000 gifts. But unending gifts. Receive. Be blessed. Give. Bless someone else. What a cycle! So today, I thank God for grace through little girls' clothes.

"A Little Child Shall Lead Them"

2011-02-28T13:09:00.007-06:00

My kids are both amazing. In so many ways - in sometimes very different ways. Sure, they're also sometimes argumentative, sassy, whiney, etc. But that's not the "real" person. The real, true person in each of them is quite amazing. And resilient. And courageous.

Hannah is 7. She's outgoing, creative, and very social. She also has a beautiful voice and loves to sing. The 2nd grade at her school did a performance recently and she was thrilled to be singing on-stage with her peers. She even had a small speaking part where she read off some facts about the Star-Spangled Banner. She did great, made no mistakes, and I was proud of her. I was especially proud remembering the difficult time she's had with her speech over the years. She's come so far!!

But I was even more proud of her the following Sunday in church. Our church has some pretty great music and Hannah loves to sing and praise. But she also has a perfectionist living inside of her that doesn't want to make a mistake. In anything. Oh - we've had some good discussions in the past few years about how everyone makes mistakes, no one is perfect, etc. etc. But I haven't really seen the fruit of those discussions - if she "messes up" and knows it - she's pretty upset about it usually. So anyway, the praise band was singing a song that wasn't quite as familar to our congregation as some. The words were on the screen and the band was doing a great job. But the response of the congregation was not quite as enthusiastic as normal. (They liked the song - they just weren't singing along with gusto since they didn't know it as well). Except for Hannah. She was singing out and enjoying herself. Until there was a pause in the words and Hannah started back before everyone else with a really loud "OHH..." (That was the next word, she just beat everyone else by a second or two). We've all seen it happen before, and for some of us, we've been the one to do it. People giggled, because it was cute. And it was cute. Except that Hannah didn't think so. She laughed at first, but then when she realized *other* people were laughing, she got embarrassed. She turned her head towards me and hid it from everyone else. And she was wiping tears away. I whispered to her that it was okay, no big deal and that other people had done the same thing. I told her I had done the same thing before. She looked at me and said "but I don't want to mess up - I'm embarrased". I quickly reminded her that everyone messes up sometimes, said it's okay to be embarrased, but then move on. Don't spend the rest of the service worried about it. The next song started and it was another not-quite so familiar song. Hannah sat quietly, not singing. I didn't really blame her. Because if it was me, I'd have done the same thing! I don't like to be embarrased either. And while I do normally participate in the music, if I don't know the song, I'm much more cautious. I guess it made me a little sad that she was learning to be cautious, but I understood it.

And then...she took a deep breath and began singing sweetly and loud enough that her voice could be heard at least around where we were sitting. I looked at her and saw that she was enjoying herself again. No fear. Just praise and songs and smiles. The sermon Sunday was great. But the "sermon" that meant the most to me was watching my sweet daughter. That's what I want to be like! To mess up, to cry about it if you must, and then to move on with trust and not fear! Not in music, but in life.

Time..

2010-12-31T22:03:00.003-06:00

I almost let December 2010 slip away without realizing something. This month marks a milestone for our family. 31 months ago, Sadie entered our family. At the time, she was 31 months old. We begin 2011 with Sadie having been with us longer than she wasn't. Makes me smile. :-)

I remember hitting this milestone with Hannah, but because she was slightly older at adoption, and because of when her birthday is, she was well into kindergarten when we reached this point. So I guess I wasn't realizing that Sadie was so close and almost missed it. It feels like she's been a part of us forever.

Surgery

2010-12-31T16:36:00.005-06:00

See previous post for Christmas fun and pictures.

So, two days after Christmas Hannah had surgery on her nose. This is hopefully her last cleft-related repair at least until she's a teenager. Although she still has two ear surgeries coming at some point. But anyway, she was such a trooper and did great.

We had to be at the hospital at 7:00 a.m. and she wasn't taken back for surgery until about 11:00. ugh. But she never complained of being hungry, thankfully. Bored, yes. Because unlike our visit to the after-hours clinic the day before, this time we spent the vast majority of those 4 hours in a room by ourselves. So no fun playdate. But she did play video games, read, and watch t.v. In some of her previous surgeries, Hannah had the "happy juice" medicine they can give you prior to surgery. It's the stuff that makes you loopy and happy so you don't even care when they wheel you the OR. But last January when she had her tubes out of her ears they wouldn't give it to her because it was such a short procedure. (And the medicine wouldn't have time to leave her system before we went home). She did fine without it. And she woke up so much more pleasant. Well, pleasant might not be the right word. But she woke up without screaming and confusion. I'm convinced the screaming and confusion in prior recoveries was at least partly that medicine. We tried again without it this past summer when she had her bone graft. Again, much easier recovery. So once again, we turned down the "happy juice". And she had no problems heading to the OR. The guy that took her down had her laughing and cutting up as they left. And she woke up groggy, but with no tears or confusion at all. This time, even removing the I.V. didn't stress her out. Bittersweet I guess..good that the stuff that used to scare her doesn't anymore. But I hate she's had enough surgeries for her to "get used to it". Still, I'm so grateful we live in a place and I have insurance that enables her to get such great medical care.

Hannah's surgeon came to chat with us before the surgery. I can't tell you how much we appreciate and like him. He's an amazing surgeon, but he also is just a great person and has a great bedside manner. He always seems to put kids at ease. Well, he came to us wearing a surgical hat that had pictures of sponge bob on it. Hannah took one look at it and say "uh, Dr. Grant, I don't like sponge bob. He's not really appropriate. Can you change your hat before you do my surgery?" Then she told him "You can change to plain blue." As I cringed, he just said "yeah, I can change it. I don't really like sponge bob either". And true to his word, he changed before surgery. Well, at least I don't have to worry about Hannah not speaking up for herself!!

Surgery went well and recovery in the hospital was pretty uneventful. We were surprised but happy that our surgeon decided we could go on home and didn't need to spend the night. While waiting for Hannah to wake up a little more and make sure she was okay to leave, I got to talk to another mom whose daughter was having surgery for cleft lip too. I'd met her before at events done by our adoption agency..but kind of cool how we keep running into other families at the hospital. I also had a sweet friend stop by for a few minutes. The nurse responsible for Hannah during recovery was super nice and very helpful with getting prescriptions filled, checking on everything. She sat with Hannah while I ran down to the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions. And while I'm sure she had plenty to do, she acted like taking care of Hannah was the only thing she was there for.

Hannah's done well recovering at home. Very little pain and soreness. She had some swelling the first couple days, and then the bruising set in. She's still pretty bruised. And this may be TMI, but her nose looks a mess. I mean, the surgery job looks really good. But the slight runny nose combined with dried blood and such combined with limited ability to clean it due to not messing up the stitches means that generally, she looks a mess. But it's getting better day by day and according to her surgeon, she should be good to go to return to school on Tuesday. No PE or active play for 6 weeks though. That's been a little hard as she's been feeling better the last couple days. She's been a little stir-crazy and grumpy at times. We've done lots of crafts and games around here. And yesterday we went to the movies. But all in all, things are going well and I'm so proud of her. She has such courage and resiliency!!

Update that ends with H's playdate at the hospital

2010-12-29T21:56:00.016-06:00

November - well, how I am supposed to remember what happened in November? It's almost January. I know there was Thanksgiving, and good food, and visit to my parents house, and much to be thankful for. And there were flu vaccines all around. Of which I am SO thankful for because seriously everyone I know has a kid with the flu about now. Let's see, what else? Oh yeah, Hannah volunteered to sing a song for the residents of a local retirement home. My church does a worship service there every month for the residents. Hannah practiced (and perfected!) "Thy Word is a Lamp Unto My Feet" and sang it beautifully one Sunday morning. She was a bit nervous, but had a blast and did a great job. She sure put a smile on everyone's face. She has a beautiful voice and loves to sing. Sadie loves to sing too. But her ability to carry is a tune, is, well..still developing. So is mine. :-) Actually Sadie has a great ability to change songs in the middle. What might start out as Jingle bells could easily become Silent Night or Old Macdonald or the ABC's or something else she made up. She doesn't sing *songs*, she sings *medleys*. But Sadie put a smile on everyone's face too because she walked around saying hi with her beautiful smile and giving out hugs. We also spent an afternoon at a nearby farm having pictures done. It was fun and they turned out so great. I'll try to get a few up on here soon.

So November consisted of Thanksgiving, flu shots, Hannah singing, and pictures. And 26 other days that were busy but I don't remember with what.

And then December. Christmas parades, visits with Santa, and parties galore! School parties, Brownie parties, dance parties, going to see the Nutcracker, elf mischief, church events.

Like most people, it was busy. And yet, there was a calmness this year too. Most of the busyness ended a week before Christmas. When school got out, we spent a couple days at my parents house celebrating Christmas with them.

Then we came home and spent the rest of the week relaxing, playing outside, making home-made playdoh, reading stories of Christmas, driving around to see lights, and just enjoying the time we had not to hurry. On Christmas eve, we spent a good part of the day outside while the girls rode their bikes.

We saw Santa as he came through the neighborhood on the fire truck as he does every year. We enjoyed the Christmas eve service at church. We came home, ate supper, enjoyed Charlie Brown's Christmas with popcorn and hot chocolate, and made sure to put out reindeer food before bed.

And food for Santa. Only Santa didn't get cookies at our house. He got a piece of bread and a spoonful of cranberry sauce (since we didn't have grape juice). And Hannah left a note "We left you kind of communion so you can remember Jesus is more important". See, Santa had made a suprise visit at church that evening and had taken communion. It made for a good conversation on the way home about how even Santa knows he's not the most important. Even Santa takes time to stop and remember Jesus. So Hannah decided to serve him communion at our house too! Very sweet, even if I was kind of hoping for chocolate.

I shopped online almost exclusively this year. So there was no running around searching for gifts. And pretty much most of the gifts our family gave were homemade gifts. Santa's gifts were not, but most of the others were. And it was great. The girls had a great time making gifts, such as scarves for cousins. They enjoyed painting old soft drink bottles that we turned into bowling sets for a couple of younger cousins.

I found printouts online for a "Journal in Jar" gift that I loved. So that's what most adult family members got. Except a couple of the men - since I didn't think they'd be as into journaling. But they're basically old mason jars with writing prompts inside. Presented with a notebook and pen. I loved the questions too - questions about family, childhood, favorites, opinions, and memories. They also had a child-version. So one of the girls' 9 year old cousins got that. And the girls both got one too. Sadie likes it because it's like Hannah's. Hannah LOVES it. She's been using the prompts every day. She had seen me making them for others and she was so very excited to have her very own.
As far as Santa goes, the girls were pretty thrilled on Christmas morning with their pillow pets. That's the one thing they asked for. And Sadie..thrilled beyond belief with her new camera and dancing Mickey Mouse. We have had a lot of pictures being taken lately. And Hannah got a karaoke machine. Which she LOVED until the microphone just died that evening. She was a bit dissapointed, but was okay when I told her we'd get a new microphone. She amused herself with her new Magic Science kit.

And it snowed! We didn't have a white Christmas like so many of our neighbor cities. But we did see snow falling on Christmas day. Beautiful. And the day after Christmas, we got enough of a dusting for a few snowballs. And an attempted snow angel!

We spent some time the day after Christmas at our friends' Beth and Wayne's (a.k.a. nana and granddaddy) house. The girls had a ball with more gifts, snowball throwing with cousins, lunch, and play-time. Then Hannah and I headed for her appointment at the Children's Hospital after-hours clinic. For an ear infection. And yes, I did let my 7 year old that I suspected had an ear infection out in the snow to play. It only snows an average of once a year here - I wasn't about to make her miss it. (But don't worry mom, I made her wear a hat!) And yes, she did have an ear infection. We found that out after waiting 4 hours. But we were lucky because as we were leaving, they changed the sign to read "6 hour wait with appointment". Yikes. But at least all she had was an ear infection. One that wasn't even particularly painful. So many of the other kids had the flu. Or suspected flu. You kind of get to know people when you sit in the waiting room so long. And while I was thinking "lots of sick people..let's just sit over here by ourselves and read or play video games quietly", Hannah saw the situation a little differently. Her view was "Awesome..so many kids. I'm going to make new friends!" So she had a 3 hour play-date (the 4th hour we were in a room by ourselves) with kids who probably had the flu. great. Again, so thankful for that flu vaccine. Oh, and by the end, she'd become such great friends with one little girl that the other mom wrote her phone number and address down for me and invited us to come over to play anytime. But finally, armed with a prescription for antibiotics, we went home. And I bathed Hannah in the hand sanitizer in my car before we pulled out of the parking lot. Just kidding - sort of. As much as I hated to spend 4 hours in the after-hours clinic on a Sunday for an ear infection that didn't even seem to really bother Hannah (rather than waiting until the next morning to see her regular pediatrician), I needed her seen that day because the next day was...surgery day. (coming soon!)

October Wrap-Up

2010-11-01T19:13:00.010-05:00

Our first big event in October was Sadie's birthday. I can't believe my sweet little one is 5!! Wow!! She had a great birthday party at the park with her friends. It was a "baby doll" birthday party. Then on her actual birthday, she enjoyed dinner at a local restaurant. Fun times!!

Of course, my weekend with prison was a big October event..but I've already written about that (scroll to next post).

Hannah wrapped up her cheerleading season. Her coach was so sweet to let Sadie join in on the cheers for the last game. It's been fun and Hannah was so sad to see it end.

On Halloween, we had two separate events. First was "Children's Day" at our church where children dressed in costumes, sang, led worship, and had fun activities afterwards such as inflatables, hayride, etc. They'd been learning about "super heroes" and so dressed as such. Here's Sadie in her "super bunny!" costume and Hannah in her "Lady Truth" costume.

That night, we joined some friends in another neighborhood to trick or treat. Both girls decided to be the Easter bunny. :-) The girls had a blast and it was definately more fun going as a group. One of their friends' fathers had this cool contraption that he drove the kids around on which they thought was the best thing ever. We ended the evening with chili at a friends' house and went home and crashed. Definately one of our most fun halloween nights.

Prison Update

2010-10-27T21:21:00.002-05:00

This past weekend was our Kairos retreat in the prison. To those who made cookies for us or prayed for us - THANK YOU! It was an incredible weekend. The Holy Spirit was present with us in a big way.
It was so so good to be back in that little chapel. It may sound crazy, but being in prison, I just feel so "right" and at peace. (of course, that's being there as a volunteer!)

We had 104 ladies with us for the two days. Let me just say, that's a LOT of people packed into a small space. But it was just such a blessing as we sang, worshipped, talked, listened, and loved. I sat at a table with 10 of those ladies for the weekend and my heart was touched by each of them as they shared their struggles to live a life of faith in that place. While numerous obstacles tried to get in the way before we ever entered that prison (let's just say it was completely God that we got to go in at all!), once we were there, we felt God's favor in so many ways. We had wonderful and helpful officers on duty with us in the chapel. The prison's chaplain led worship with us on Sunday morning, and it was a very heartfelt, moving time of worship. We sang, prayed, shouted, and danced. Our team just really connected together and worked together. Lives were renewed and refreshed by our amazing God. I am so thankful to have had the opportunity to be a part of this weekend. And now I'm praying for our "sisters in white" (ladies in the prison - they wear white uniforms) as they face this week back in their regular institutional life..that they would remember who they are, remember how much they are loved, and seek God's power in their daily struggles. And I'm praying for Kairos ministry as a whole as we pray for continued opened doors to further the ministry there. Please join us with your prayers.

Hannah's Cheerleading Pictures

2010-10-14T20:03:00.004-05:00

Prison (A post that is not about my children..although they are still my favorite topic! :-)

2010-10-02T22:55:00.004-05:00

I drive a lot for work. My car and I travel a lot of county roads. Occasionally I pass crews of men or women who are in prison and are out cleaning up the roads. Sometimes they are city or county crews – usually given away by the orange jumpsuits. But sometimes I also see white clothing with the familiar black letters on the back (DOC). Department of Corrections. Many years ago, I just drove by them without a 2nd thought. I didn’t actually think badly of them. No, my attitude was almost worse. I simply didn’t think of them at all. They had nothing to do with me or what I was doing or where I was going. They were “other”, not like me and not a part of me.

That all changed in 2001. One Sunday morning I was walking in the door of my church when I was greeted by a friend who said, “Hey! I’m going to lead a Kairos weekend in September and I’d love for you to help. Are you interested?” I said, “Sure, I’d love to!” I then entered the church and thought “Oh crap! What did I just do??? I didn’t mean that!”

See, my friend was very involved in prison ministry at our state women’s prison a couple hours away. Kairos was the name of the ministry she was involved in. I’d just told her that I’d love to minister in prison! Um, yeah. That wasn’t really my “thing” back then. I’d never even considered the idea. Up until that point, I’d volunteered with different groups of people. Kids mainly. Kids were my “thing”. I’m a teacher and I love kids. I love all kids – but my heart has always been with those who struggle (tough homes, low income, but especially those with disabilities). But adults in general weren’t my “thing” and especially adults in prison. I got nervous. What would I say to someone in prison? How could I relate to them? I thought prison ministry was a good thing for someone else to do, but not me! I had actually sent cards to some men in prison as part of a project before. But to talk to them, sit with them, spend a weekend with them? What was I thinking?! Actually I wasn’t thinking. My mouth said yes before my brain could engage in a debate. And while I generally can say “no” pretty well, I’m very thankful that in that instance, I said “yes”. I don’t exactly know why I didn’t ever go back to my friend and say “hey, I made a mistake and I meant no”, except that I started listening to God. And somehow, this started seeming “right”.

It’s 9 years later and I’ve been in that prison numerous times. Maybe 5 times for full Kairos weekend retreats (3.5 days each), twice for shorter 2-day follow-up retreats, and more times than I can count for monthly reunions lasting a couple hours. Somewhere between a Thursday night in September and the following Sunday afternoon back in 2001, prison ministry became my “thing”. My fears? Irrelevant in the face of what God was doing. You know what I learned about relating to people in prison? They are people. And just like me and you, those ladies are people of great worth. The woman wearing that white DOC uniform and I are the same in God’s eyes. We have the same fears, hopes, and dreams. We have both made mistakes. We have both sinned. We are both in need of God’s grace and forgiveness. God loves me intensely with an amazing love. God loves her just as intensely with just as much amazing love. True, I have not committed a crime that could end me up in prison. But have I committed crimes in my heart? Have I gone against what God wanted me to do at times? Yes, it’s part of being human. But God’s grace is there for me, and it’s there for the women (and men) in prison as well. And because of that, I can relate to the ladies there as sisters..sisters in Christ. It’s a really, really beautiful thing.

It’s a beautiful thing, but it’s not always easy. Kairos’ mission is to “bring Christ’s love to the incarcerated, their families, and those who work with them”. It’s tough sometimes. Because even though God sees us as his children, equally loved, the world doesn’t always see that way. And the world passes that message on to us, and to them. Sometimes I have to fight through a temptation to think that in some way I’m “better than” my sister wearing white who is sitting across from me. More often, I fight the opposite temptation to think that I’m “not good enough” to make a difference. And sometimes our new friends, they struggle with those things too. They struggle to impress us, make us think they’re “better than”, “tougher than”, etc. Or, they struggle with thinking they’re not good enough, don’t’ deserve God’s love, etc. It’s not just the relationships inside the prison that are tough. Our relationships with other team members aren’t always easy either. We’re a pretty diverse bunch: we are young, older, black, white, from big churches, from small churches, and from many different denominations. . We disagree with each other at times. Sometimes we hurt one another’s feelings, even if unintentionally. Sometimes, we just plain irritate and frustrate each other. But God’s grace covers us all and because of that we learn to pray together, listen to each other, forgive, and love. It helps that we also sing together, eat together, and laugh together. God shows up, and lives are transformed right before my eyes, every time. Sometimes, it’s even my life that gets transformed as I learn a little more each time about what God’s heart looks like in the world.

After a couple years hiatus, I will be entering the prison again in a few weeks for a 2-day retreat with Kairos prison ministry. I am very excited about what God has in store for the weekend. Please join me in praying for our team, the chaplain, warden, and officers of the prison, and for the approximately 75 women who will be with us for those 2 days. I know God has great things in store. This is the first time I will have been in the prison since Sadie came home from China 2.5 years ago, and only the 2nd since Hannah came 4.5 years ago. But I’ve been sensing God’s whisper to Go, love, and serve. I go because I love the women there. I also go because I want my children to grow up seeing me use the gifts and passion God puts inside me to serve Him, but I go mainly because God nudges me there and He is there.

My favorite “snapshot” of ministry in that place is that we close every reunion, every retreat, the same way. We all gather in a large circle in that small, simple chapel. Nothing fancy. A cross and Bible on the altar along with a battery-powered “candle” (you know, we can’t have fire in a prison – it’s against the rules!) A circle made up of very diverse women whose only common denominator is Christ. Women who have shared our lives over the past hours or days. Our team of women in jeans and colorful t-shirts interspersed with women in white uniforms. We all join hands together and sing a song proclaiming that there is only one God, only one King, and only one Body (of Christ) and asking God to bind our hearts together with his love. I’m not a big crier. But that moment gets me every time. I feel a lump in my throat and my eyes tear up as I look around that circle while we all praise the God who unites us. I imagine that feeling of unity and peace and love is just a taste of what heaven feels like. Who knew that when I said yes to prison ministry, I was saying yes to getting a glimpse of heaven?

Now, when I pass work crews with those white uniforms and “DOC” on the back, I notice. They are no longer “other” and their lives matter very much to me. And actually, so do the lives of those in the orange county / city jail uniforms. They matter too. I think about them and about the others those uniforms represent. I slow down just a little and as I pass by, I whisper a prayer of God’s peace, protection, and guidance on their lives. Just maybe, next time you pass one of those crews, you’ll sense a little nudge too…to notice them, to slow down just a little, and to whisper a prayer.

** And if anyone would like to help with our Kairos retreat (Oct. 23-24), there are a couple things we need. The three primary things: prayers, cookies and money. We love to take homemade cookies so if you can make a dozen or two, call me or e-mail me at DeEtte530@juno.com (you kind of have to live locally to me for this – so I can meet you to pick them up). Or if you want to make a donation to help cover the cost of the retreat, let me know that too. We will be feeding 75 ladies, 15 team members, a couple officers, and the chaplain of the prison a small breakfast, snacks, and lunch both days we are there. A $5 donation can sponsor lunch for one lady. More is always welcome. Most importantly, we would appreciate your prayers.

September Recap

2010-09-28T22:34:00.004-05:00

1. I found out Sadie can't see. Not really, but she did go to the opthalmologist where I found out she has a pretty significant astigmatism and needs glasses. It wasn't a huge suprise - I suspected vision problems which is why I took her in the first place. But seeing her actually undergo vision testing and hearing the results made everything click together and answered some questions. For one, I now understand why she always had such a hard time when we played "I spy" in the car - she can't see what we're pointing out. What I basically had explained to me was that she was very slightly near-sighted, but she had a moderate-severe astigmatism that cancelled that out and made things blurry up close and far away. But things farther away were affected more. Anyway, doesn't she look adorable in her glasses? She's taken very good care of them and is great about wearing them all day. But I'm not suprised - she's pretty easy going on things like that.

2.Sadie got a great report from her hand doctor in Atlanta. We don't go back to see him for a full year. We love the staff there and are so grateful for all they have done for Sadie.

3. Hannah started cheering with Upward. I thought this might be a "sure, try it this season" thing where she tried it, decided it wasn't "all that" and then moved on. Nope. She L.O.V.E.S. it!! She's pretty good too - definately has the "spirit". And leadership - I must say I've been impressed with how she's handled herself on game days.

4. Both girls started dance. Hannah is taking ballet and jazz and having a lot of fun with the jazz part. After a year off, I moved her from the dance studio she was previously at to one closer to our home. Her other studio was good and their director was very nice to us. But the move has been a very good experience. I like her teacher and how she handles class time for the kids. They're learning a lot, but it has a different feel to it - it's just a good match for Hannah's personality. I like that I don't drive as far. (I like that it's cheaper!). And Hannah likes the addition of jazz and she likes having friends from school in her class. This is Sadie's first year and she is taking a preschool ballet and tap class. All I can say about Sadie is that what she lacks in coordination, she makes up for in personality. She is having so much fun, although she is a little, um, "social". (yeah, she talks too much!!)

5. Hannah started brownies. She is "bridging up" from Daisies (the kindergarten-first grade part of Girl Scouts) and is excited about all the possibilities and events that encompasses. It's a pretty active troop and most of the girls in her troop go to school with her which Hannah is enjoying. I guess she's at an age now where her friendships are starting to become more important. It's fun to watch. Especially since her friends are some really sweet and fun girls.

If September was busy, October promises to be more so. But it's good. We are having fun, enjoying the fall weather (finally!), and enjoying one another.

August is Gone Already???

2010-09-03T21:23:00.008-05:00

Wow! I just can't believe August is over. Fall is here. I'm so ready weather-wise for fall!! :-)

Sadie is happy to be back at "Ms. Sherry's house" for her last preschool year. She is learning so much and soaking up everything right now - it's neat to see her at this stage. That last year before kindergarten has always been one of my favorite ages of kids and it's fun to see Sadie at this stage. Very curious, very interested in everything, full of questions and full of life.

First Day of School: 2010

Hannah is in 2nd grade this year. She's loving her teacher, her class, and her friends. She's off to a great start. I'm finding that I am really enjoying her at this age right now. She's young enough that she likes to play and likes to cuddle and likes to do some "little kid" stuff still. Yet, she's also entering that world of "big kid" and she's become very independent. And she's fun to talk to and sometimes gets my jokes now!! ha ha!! Of course, she doesn't quite have the hang of telling her own yet - they still make no sense. :-)

Speaking of Hannah, she turned 7 years old earlier this week. Wow! She had a great birthday. Sunday night she had a party with her friends at the park. In the rain. And mud. It really was fun though and at least it wasn't so hot. Hannah rates it as her best birthday party so that means success. (And the fact that I think it was the cheapest and the easiest to plan is a bonus!) The girls mostly ran around jumping in water puddles and stepping in mud for most of the party. I organized one game, and they organized themselves into a couple others. They ate pizza. I let the girls decorate cupcakes and Hannah opened her presents. And that was pretty much it. Then, on her actual birthday, Hannah came downstairs wearing her dress with cupcakes smocked on it (she's had it since she was 4, I didn't know it would still fit - but it did) and a headband with birthday stars. She wanted to make sure everyone knew it was her birthday. :-) She had a great day at school and then we went out for dinner, her choice. We went to a local Chinese restaurant and then came home for Hannah to find her "big" present: a new bike. She had outgrown her old one and it was time.

The other big news for Sadie is that she got a new bed this month. She'd been sleeping in a toddler bed ever since she came home from China at 2.5 years old. She'll be 5 in October and well, she's kind of outgrown that bed. I've been planning to get her one at some point. Well, one day last week her babysitter told me she had seen one at the thrift store that looked like new. I went to look at it that afternoon, and sure enough..still had the directions in the drawers and everything. It was in great condition. And now, Sadie finally has her "big girl" bed. She has been SO excited about it!

To Come: September and fall craziness! Cheerleading (Hannah), Dance (both girls: Sadie's first time), and Brownies (Hannah). I love fall though. It's my favorite time of year. So bring it on!!

Different Personalities

2010-07-14T12:44:00.004-05:00

Today we went to our local library's End-of-Summer Reading Celebration. First of all, what's up with an "End of Summer" program mid-July?? It certainly did not *feel* like summer was ending..it was HOT. Stations were set up outside and lunch was served. And there was a show and prizes were given away. We had about an hour and a half. There was no way for the kids to do everything..choices had to be made. Luckily, being a local event at a place we were very familiar with made it easier to let the kids make different choices. It was in a small area outside the library and I could see everything. Bigger events mean they have to choose to do the same thing because it's the only way I can watch them both unless we are with others. But this was just different..so for a rare treat, they got to make different choices. I stayed with Sadie and allowed Hannah a little bit of freedom.

Sadie chose anything that did not have a long line. (She's like me in that!! hee hee) She waited about 5 minutes to get a balloon sword, colored a paper hat, helped me pick up all 3 of our lunches, ate lunch on a blanket, and wandered around with me "making new friends". She thinks she looks tough in this sword-fighting pose..with a cookie in her mouth. :-)

Hannah chose to have her face painted. She waited in line the WHOLE time. An hour and a half. I took her a lunch which she ate in line. A sweet older girl of about 10 behind her was nice to "save her place" a couple of times for Hannah to run to the blanket where we were to get a drink. But she stood there, without one complaint, for the rest of the time. Did I mention that it was HOT?? Was it worth it?

She certainly thought so. She didn't whine once that she didn't get to do anything else. She smiled all the way home and said "I'm SO happy, thanks for taking me". I don't stand in line for an hour and a half for anything. Not even at Disney World. So I guess it's a good thing it was a place I felt comfortable letting her have a little freedom. Sadie was slightly dissapointed when she noticed Hannah was FINALLY next in line. She thought she was going to run up there and get in line with Hannah. Um, no. I had to explain that while she had run around having fun and doing lots of fun things, Hannah had done nothing but stand in line for a REALLY long time, and the kids behind Hannah had stood in line a REALLY long time, and it just wasn't fair for her to run up at the last minute and jump in the front of the line. She looked dissapointed for all of 5 seconds, and then ran off to balloon sword fight with a nearby little boy. I love watching their different personalities emerge and grow!!

Life in our house when it's REALLY hot!

2010-07-08T19:54:00.008-05:00

Today was 100 degrees. TOO hot for me. I thought about driving to a friend's house with a pool. We've done that this summer too. Instead, we stayed inside. All day. Well, except for one little outing to CVS. So, here's a rundown of our afternoon. (If you're curious about the morning, well, that would be that we slept late, watched t.v., and basically did nothing productive).

1. First, I cleaned and the girls did some "chores". That means that Hannah sprayed a little windex mixed with water all over the mirrors and eventually did get them clean, after making designs first. She also straightened the playroom, which was a MAJOR undertaking. It didn't have to be - all she had to do was pick up the handful of toys on the floor and put them on the shelves. Instead, she took EVERYTHING off the shelves and put it all in the floor, because she "wanted to make it neater". Admirable effort. But in the middle she got way overhwhelmed. So I sat in the floor with her and gave directions while she put things away as we listened to an old James Taylor CD. And then we needed to reward ourselves so we all went to CVS, where I had extracare bucks to spend. The girls got candy for their reward. Me? I got some more windex, and a diet coke. That made me happy. If you want to know what "chores" Sadie did to earn a reward, well, she waved a duster all over the living room while singing. It occassionally actually touched some furniture and maybe some dust. I think she rearranged the dust actually. She also "organized" the movies. She said they were all in the wrong covers, so she put them where they belong. Except she can't read and she didn't pay attention to the pictures. So actually she organized them into the *wrong* covers. But she thought she helped, so she got candy too. We don't usually get treats for chores, but that playroom was a big one. And I really wanted the diet coke. And I had extracare bucks to spend. :-)

2. We spent some time reading. We all read to ourselves, Hannah read to Sadie, and I read to both girls.

3. Hannah created a "purse" for Sadie and a "mailbox" for her out of construction paper. Too bad I didn't get pictures of these..and they didn't last. But it kept them busy for a good 45 minutes.

4. I had this brilliant idea that we'd take a couple balloons they had in the floor and do paper mache with them. So, we all sat in the floor and tore up a magazine I had into little strips. The next step will be to put them on the balloons and cover them with a glue/water mixture. Let dry. Repeat. Paint. I think we're going to make people out of them. But we didn't actually get farther than tearing the paper today. Because when we finished tearing, we, um, I mean the girls, couldn't resist doing this:

(that's a twizzler in Sadie's mouth.)

5. As I was cooking supper, Hannah left me this message on the dry erase easel:

(It says "to mommy can you come to our dance show after supper and if you need to work or clean stuff and clean dishes and do lundry thats ok with us from Hannah")

6. So of course, we had a dance show, complete with numerous costume changes.

7. Then, we settled down for the evening..showers, snack, teeth brushed, and ended with some more reading time.

A 100 degree day isn't so bad sometimes. But I hope it's cool enough to actually get outside tomorrow. I think the high is supposed to be only 94. I hope we don't get cold. :-)

Post-Op Visit

2010-06-24T19:24:00.000-05:00

Hannah is recovering nicely. The problem the last few days has been how to keep her from being as active as she wants to be! We've been visiting the library and reading a lot, doing puzzles, painting, and other more calming activities. She's still limping slightly and tires easily, but is ready to take off and GO. Go turn cartwheels, Go jump on the trampoline, just GO! She can't do those things quite yet though. Her surgeon was happy with how she's doing, both hip-wise and mouth-wise. As far as activity level, he said I could let her start doing a little more. He said she could swim anytime, which made her very happy. Hannah asked him if she could run and play at the park. He said yes, but to be very careful and cautious. Um, right. I think we'll skip the park for a few more days. At this point, she can do whatever she can tolerate as far as her hip is concerned. What we have to be careful with is not bumping her mouth and messing up the graft. As far as food, he said she still needed to be careful what she ate. No hard foods such as chips, pretzels, etc. But he did tell her that a small cheeseburger and fries from McDonald's would be just fine. Guess where we had to stop for supper on the way home? We go back in a month and they will take x-rays then to see if the bone is there in her gumline and growing. But basically, he said to have a nice summer. Sounds good to me!

Feeling Better

2010-06-19T18:52:00.003-05:00

What a difference today has made! Of course, the fact that grandma came to visit might have something to do with it. The bruising on Hannah's face is worse, but the swelling is better. (You can't tell in this photo, but she really does look like someone beat her up.) She's able to eat some non-liquid food now too which has made her happy. Still very soft food only, but she managed some eggs, some spaghettios, and some mandarin oranges cut up really small.

Hannah's hip is still bothering her quite a bit, but she's off the heavy-duty pain medicine (mostly - may still give it tonight at bedtime for one last night) and on just regular ibuprofen. She's walking around more too and spending more time off the couch than on it. Though she's still walking very carefully, very slowly, and hunched over like she's 90. But she's making progress. She even managed a shower tonight, despite her protests that she didn't need one (you know, since her last one was *only* 4 nights ago..) Well, she sort of managed a shower - let's just say parts of her body got clean. We'll try the whole thing tomorrow. :-)

She also managed a trip to Wal-mart with grandma. There was absolutely no way she was going to be able to walk through the store though, so we got her the wheelchair. She was a bit self-conscious until I put Sadie in there with her..then they thought it was a grand adventure.

But the *real* sign she was feeling better? When she announced that she had to get out of "these clothes" (just t-shirt / comfy shorts) and "put on something fancy". :-) Yep, the princess is back. :-)

Bone Graft Experience

2010-06-18T14:37:00.004-05:00

This post is primarily for a couple folks I know who have younger children with clefts - who will have this surgery eventually. So, if that doesn't apply to you, feel free to read on if you want, but it may be a much of medical mumbo jumbo. :-)

We arrived at UAB hospital EARLY Wednesday morning (I think it was about 6). Surgery was supposed to be at 8:30, but I think it was more like 9:30. We had to go to the office for admitting first to pay the co-pay, fill out forms, etc. It was a very different experience than at Children's. Not better or worse - just different. Then we were directed to a surgery pre-op area. When it was time to prep someone for surgery, they called them to go to the back to get ready. They were only letting the one individual who was having surgery back (and later when they were ready, they'd get a family member to come sit with them). But being a minor, they allowed me to go back with Hannah and stay with her the whole time. She was the only child I saw..though I know from the nurses they actually had several children that morning. When we were in the pre-op room, it was pretty standard...vitals taken, meet with nurse, anesthesiology, dr., etc. They all asked the same questions. Interestingly, the all asked me how much she weighed and how tall she was, but not once was she actually weighed and measured. Just different because it seems like at Children's they are ALWAYS weighing and measuring! I knew how much Hannah weighed but didn't really know exactly how tall she was. They kind of laughed when I answered "tall enough for most rides at Disney World, but not tall enough to touch the bottom of a 4 ft pool" Everyone we met in this area was super nice. Any fears I had if it not being as "child-friendly" were erased. In fact, she may have gotten more attention being one of only a few children they saw. They actually couldn't find a child-size gown though, so Hannah was a given a gown that would fit me! Seriosly. I wasn't sure they'd be able to find her in there!! Hannah was pretty funny through the whole thing. She played video games and watched tv mostly. But she was not shy about answering questions honestly. "How are you doing today?" got the immediate answer of "bad. Want to know why? Because I have to have surgery". But when it was time to go, she seemed pretty comfortable. The nurse who took her was great and had her laughing as she wheeled her to the OR. They didn't put her IV in until she was asleep from the mask first. I actually heard of a slightly older child (9 I think) that day who was given the choice of an IV before or after and she chose before.

Anyway, surgery was about an hour and a half. I was directed to a waiting room area to "check in" and leave my cell phone number. Then I was able to go downstairs and get something to eat before heading back to the waiting room area. When it was over, her surgeon called the waiting room phone to tell me everything went well and she was headed to recover. It was probably a good 45 minutes later when I was taken back to recovery and she was just starting to wake up. Hannah was a little irritated, but within a few minutes was listening while I read Junie B. Jones to her. We went to the room after just a bit and settled in.

The night was pretty uneventful. Of course her medicines were spaced out far enough that someone was in her room every couple hours - so sleep was not really possible. But other than that, things were fine.
Hannah was able to get out of bed to go to the bathroom, but that was the only times she got out of bed that night. The next morning, a physical therapist came by to get her up and walking more. She protested and didn't want to do it, but once she got started, did pretty well. She walked around the whole floor and then settled back in her bed. Food wise - she was on clear liquids the whole time we were in the hospital. Apple juice, a little sprite, chicken broth, jello. That was pretty much all she ate.

Pain wise, she really wasn't in much pain the first night. She had a morphine pump that she could push when she was hurting. (and it "locked out" for so long after she pushed it so she couldn't accidentally give herself too much). She didn't use most of what she had available. And when she did push it, it was more often because she said her hand was hurting (where the IV was). I did get a mini-lecture when the nurse brought it about how Hannah was the only one who knew how much pain she was in so she was the ONLY one who was allowed to push the button. She kept reapeating it. I promised I wouldn't go push the button! But actually, Hannah would forget about it. She'd cry and say something was hurting and I'd have to remind her she could push the button. She also had a pain pump that attached directly to her incision site in her hip with a small catheter. It just automatically kept pain medicine slowly going to her hip.

The next morning the pain pump was taken away and the pump in her hip was removed as well. She was put on strictly oral pain medicine at that point to get her ready to go home (which she's still on about every 6 hours).

The first night Hannah didn't have much swelling, but by the time we left the next day, she had a good bit of swelling. Now (day 3), she's still pretty swollen, but it may have gone down some. She's also got the beginning of some bruising - also normal.

Food wise, since we've been home yesterday afternoon - she's had mostly liquid, but not just clear liquids. She's had a milkshake and some tomato soup and instant mashed potatoes that are so thin they were liquid, along with some yogurt. Tonight, she can start trying soft, but not liquid things. (eggs, thicker mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, soft pancakes, etc.). She'll stay on that diet for 2 weeks. A dietician did come by to give food ideas and talk to us while we were there.

Since we've been home, Hannah's hip is still really sore. Moving from lying to sitting to standing and back is the hardest. Once she's up - she walks around okay. I let her sleep downstairs (started on the couch, ended up on a blow-up mattress) so she wouldn't have to climb the stairs. But she's climbed the stairs twice now anyway on her own. She'll slowly start walking more and more on it and she's supposed to be back to normal in two weeks.

While in the hospital, we were on what seemed like a pediatric heart floor. I think because most of the pediatric patients at UAB are heart patients. But there were 3 girls including Hannah there for the same bone graft surgery. Interestingly, we knew one of them! We didn't know they were going to be there. I was walking down the hall that first night and saw a man I recognized. I couldn't remember his name in that moment but knew I knew him. Sure enough. He and his wife have children also adopted from China through the same agency I used. Their oldest daughter was there for the same surgery as Hannah. The girls didn't actually get to see each other until the next day, but Hannah was interested to know that someone else was there who was going through the same thing she was. The girls' mother stopped by our room for a chat and Hannah bombarded her with questions about her daughter "she's from China like me?, does she have a cleft lip and palate too? is she still bleeding too? (from her nose), is her face swollen too? does her hip hurt too? did they scoop out bone and put it in her mouth?,etc?" We ended up being discharged at the same time and walked out together. Both girls from China in wheelchairs with their faces swollen in similar manners. We were stopped and asked about them being twins and the people who asked found it hard to believe they weren't related at all and weren't from the same family.

Hannah's surgeon was very happy with how her surgery went. Both immediately afterwards and when he came by to see her later that day. The residents who saw her that night and again the next morning all said the same thing. They all said her surgery had gone very well, no suprises, and they expected success. We will go back to see them later next week for a post-op visit.

So for now, Hannah's on the "you have permission to be lazy" summer plan. Watching TV, playing video games, eating ice-cream, and asking for things to be brought to her on on her agenda. And I'm guessing she gets a pass on chores for up to two weeks!

Home

2010-06-17T20:52:00.003-05:00

more later - but we are home. Surgery went well. Hannah was a trooper. She's very glad to be home, even though she is still quite swollen and sore. Her hip is bothering her more than her mouth. She's walking, but she looks like a 90 year old woman! :-) I'll post more sometime this weekend.

Hannah's Smile

2010-06-13T20:34:00.003-05:00

I really love this 6 year old, teeth-missing, fading scar, not quite symmetrical smile! But she may not be smiling quite so brightly for a few days. Hannah will be having her next cleft surgery on Wed (the 16th). This is her bone graft. The surgeon will be taking bone from her hip to place in the cleft of her gumline (which is the only part that still has a hole - the rest of her palate was repaired almost 4 years ago). This will provide bone for her permanent teeth to anchor to when they come in. It's important that this surgery be done *before* her permanent top teeth come in..and well, she's at the age that it's time to do it. (We probably could have waited several months, but being a teacher - I really wanted it done in the summer. Waiting until next summer would have been pushing it). While we're not strangers to surgeries around here, this will be a new experience for us in some ways. It is a different surgeon and a different hospital. Hannah's regular cleft surgeon Dr. Grant (who is wonderful!!) doesn't do this one particular surgery. We still see him yearly, but he refers this one out to an oral surgeon. The particular surgeon we are using (the one who does a lot of these surgeries) doesn't use Children's Hospital, where we've been before. So this will be our first experience at UAB. I was a little concerned that it might be a little less "child-friendly" than Children's and it is definately less familiar to Hannah. But, I have some friends whose children have had experiences at UAB and they said they were very well taken care of and have had very good experiences there.

So, Tuesday we go for our pre-op with the surgeon and to meet the anesthesiologist. Then Wed. is our surgery. I have no idea yet what time. We'll get all our questions answered Tuesday I guess. What I do know is that we will spend 1 night in the hospital. The mouth part of the surgery is really not supposed to be that bad. She'll be swollen and bruised, but it's not supposed to be all that painful. Less than her original palate surgery I've been told, but I don't really know. She will be on a soft diet for a while, but I don't know the specifics of that (how long, how soft, etc.). I do know that her hip will be the more painful site, at least at first. She'll have a pain pump to give med. directly to the site on her hip while we're in the hospital. I expect her to be sore for a while afterwards and activity will be limited for a while, maybe a couple weeks.

So, say a prayer for my sweet Hannah this week. She's handling the anticipation remarkably well. She admits to being a little scared, but overall I think she's doing well. She did ask me in the car this morning if we could "send out invitations" for people to pray for her! love it! Consider this your invitation. :-) I also wrote out a prayer request at church and I was going to put it in the offering basket (which is one way at our church to make prayer requests known - then they e-mail them to people later). But Hannah would have none of that. She wanted to carry the prayer request slip directly to our pastor. Which she did after church. And then she told our pastor she wanted to send "invitations" to everybody so they would pray for her. Our pastor told her if she'd put that request in the basket, they'd e-mail it to the whole church and then it would be like the whole church got an invitation to pray. Hannah smiled really big and told her okay, and dropped it in the basket. I love that she's not shy about asking! Of course, neither of my girls are shy about very much. :-)

Meanwhile, Sadie is being so very sweet to Hannah about the whole thing..telling her not to be scared, she's going to pray for her, she's going to make Hannah a "beautiful card", etc. But, she's also let it be known that she's glad it's Hannah this time and not her! ha ha!! Sadie is really super excited to be spending the night at "nana and granddaddy's house!" rather than the hospital!

No New T-Shirts Club!

2010-06-11T23:11:00.005-05:00

The girls and I have formed a club. Because clubs are kind of a cool thing when you're 6 / almost 7. (And when you're 4, whatever is cool to your big sister is cool!) We're calling it the "No New T-Shirts Club!" It's a very very small step to simply life. I've been reading a book called Simple Life. It's about simplifying life in regards to time, relationships, money, and God. Good book. But it's had me thinking. My girls are very very blessed with clothes. They have been given hand-me-downs galore. And of course, grandma likes to treat the girls to new dresses from time to time. Our closets runneth over! Literally. And they have such variety..summer, winter, spring, fall, dressy, casual, school, play, "fancy" (Hannah's favorite!) I almost never need to buy them new clothes other than underwear and socks, and sometimes shoes for Hannah. Oh, and she needed a couple pairs of jeans this past year for the first time. When they outgrow a set of clothes, we have a set in the next larger size waiting to unpack. And they like it. They are thrilled with their "new" old clothes each time it happens. Sometimes, we come home from church or school or something with a bag of clothes from a friend. The first question asked (with eager anticipation) is "is it mine?". They both are hoping it's clothes for them. And *just* when I think..uh oh..I'm going to have to go buy Hannah some new clothes, this is her last size of hand-me-downs, well, someone blesses us with a set of clothes in the next larger size. It's amazing really. God is truly clothing my children every year. (Makes me think of the passage in the Bible about seeing how God dresses the lillies of the field..how much more he meets our needs). So, the point is, my children do not need new clothes. They are not in any danger of not having something to wear. But I'm wondering how many parents have noticed how many oranizations / actitivites / schools / even churches sell t-shirts for everything!! There's the school t-shirt, the field trip t-shirt (sometimes same as school but not always), the dance recital t-shirt (not that they wear it in the recital - just that they purchase it to wear after the recital), the field day t-shirt, the baton t-shirt, the vacation bible school t-shirt, and more. And I? usually buy the t-shirt. Because I don't spend money on new clothes so I can't say "it's too expensive". Because I don't want my kid to be the one without the t-shirt. Because everyone gets it. And you know, those arguments don't hold water with me for most things. But I usually give in and buy the t-shirt. And my girls really don't care about t-shirts. They don't. And a confession? Sometimes I have to actually MAKE my girls wear the t-shirt we bought for said occassion. Like tonight, Hannah did not want to wear her VBS t-shirt for the VBS celebration! She wanted a "fancier shirt". But I made her wear the VBS shirt - because I bought it.

So, we are done with new t-shirts. Mostly. Of course, some come free with participation in a certain event. If my child is handed a t-shirt, fine. But we will not blindly buy t-shirts for activities any more. By the way, this is not just about my kids. Even as an adult, it seems that some group is trying to sell me a t-shirt at least 2-3 times a year. And there's nothing wrong with that. If you buy a t-shirt to support a group you are connected with - great. And there are a few times I could forsee we *might* consider buying a shirt. But we're going to think long and hard first. And if there's not a compelling reason to do it, we're not going to do it. When Sadie starts kindergarten (not this year, but next)- I will buy her the kindergarten field trip t-shirt. Because it's a safety issue. I want the teachers to be able to glance around and know "yep, she's with us" when they're all at the pumpkin patch. So sometimes, there is a good reason. I've realized that I don't really support a group when I buy a shirt from them. Not really. Most sell the shirts cheap enough that they are not making a profit. The t-shirt company gets the profit. So it's not a fundraiser opportunity for an organization (generally with us..I realize that's not always true). Sure, we show our support by wearing the shirt..or team spirit..or whatever. And there's nothing wrong with that. But like I said, we're going to think long and hard first. We don't need t-shirts for everything we're involved in.

So - we started the "No New T-Shirt Club". But maybe we'll change the name to something else if we think of a good title. Basically, any time we choose NOT to purchase a t-shirt that an organization is selling, we're going to put a construction paper cut-out of a t-shirt on the wall in the kitchen. Then, next summer, we're going to count how many t-shirts we *didn't* buy. (I'm predicting 10 total: 5 for Hannah, 3 for me, 2 for Sadie..but we'll see. And we're not actually involved in that many activities!). Then, we're going to go buy new shirts for children who *do* need them in our community. Because there are children right in our own community that would find having 10 new t-shirts very very special. Kids that need them. So, that's our plan in the "No New T-Shirt Club". A very very small way to simplify our own lives by not buying what we don't need and a very very small way to help my kids learn to give to others.

In case you're curious about my kids' reaction to this idea: one of them thought it was great. The other had some hesitation..and I told her she didn't have to do it, but that I was going to do it and would love to have her join me. I told her I could not / would not buy a t-shirt for everything she was involved in, but if there was one or two special ones during the year..we could think about it and decide then. She informed me this morning "I don't even wear most of those t-shirts. I want to be in the club and help kids who need clothes, because we have enough clothes".

So, if anyone would like to join us - let me know! My children would love to have some more members in their "club". (And we don't even charge dues or have meetings!)

Open for All

2010-06-11T23:03:00.002-05:00

I just changed the setting on my blog that allows anyone to read without logging in. I'm not sure how long I'll leave it this way. But I'm not sure who really reads this much anymore anyway. For reasons that make sense in my head but that I don't know if I can articulate yet, I decided to experiment with making the blog public again. If you were a reader while it was private, your information is saved on the readers list. If I move back to private in the future (which I'll post and inform everyone first), those who were already listed as readers will still be able to login and read. Anyone else will need to be added by me.

Catching up? Or Maybe Not!!

2010-06-01T20:32:00.000-05:00

6 Months!! I can't believe I haven't written anything for 6 months. But now it's summer and I'd like to get back to writing. Only, so much has happened in the last 6 months there is no way I can "catch up". So, I'm not going to even try. But here's just rundown of the girls. And then, I'm going to try to move on and post things that are current more often. Try. :-)

Sadie:
Sadie is doing great! She's done with surgeries (at least for now..there's the possibility of 1 more when she's a good bit older, but maybe not). She's wearing a splint only at night and has been for quite some time. We haven't even been to the OT in probably 3 months or more. We will visit the OT at least once this summer. And probably an opthamologist to have her vision rechecked. But that's all for her. The last time we saw her hand doctor in Atlanta was March. We don't go back until September. 7 months without driving to Atlanta! It's been wonderful!! (though we do love Dr. P and his amazing staff!)

Sadie is doing wonderful developmentally. She's been receiving speech services through our school system for the past year and while she does have some language "quirks"..her speech has really come so far. She talks NONSTOP! I mean that literally - she never ever stops until she goes to sleep. (To her future teachers: I'm sorry. But it's true.) And she doesn't meet a stranger. ever. She's engaging and friendly and precious and people are just attracted to her personality. Just do me a favor. If you see us in the grocery store and you don't actually know her (or she doesn't know you!), please don't try to hug her. We've been working hard on her hugging people she knows only. Sadie played soccer this spring and loved it. Well, she loved the fun little games they played at practice. At the games, she loved socializing with "ALL MY FRIENDS!". She did score one goal in a game - it was for the wrong team..but hey, in 3 & 4 year old soccer, it just doesn't matter. She did a victory dance and everyone cheered for her regardless. Sadie celebrated her 2nd "Family Forever Day" in early May. Hard to believe it's been 2 years. She is the perfect fit to our family. Her wish list for the summer (we wrote them down tonight) includes playing in the sprinkler, putting a cup of water under her shirt and dumping it on herself, making a hat for her stuffed Mickey Mouse, tickling mommy, and blowing bubbles.

Hannah:
Also good. She's had a break of all things medical until recently. We've gone back and forth with hearing tests, ENT visits, and audiology visits this spring. Hannah had her tubes removed at the end of January. And has had a couple ear infections since then. She's failed hearing screenings and tested with a mild hearing loss. But she still has holes in her eardrums from the tube removal (they'd been in 3 years so it was a risk). We just went back to the ENT today and the holes are still there. Her ENT wants to surgically close them but thinks we might want to wait a bit first. The holes act like a natural tube and prevent fluid build up. And Hannah has another surgery coming up this summer so we're putting the ear surgery on hold until probably next spring. The only downside of that is it means she will continue to have a mild hearing loss for most of her 2nd grade year, just as she did for her 1st grade year. It's mild, and didn't seem to effect her academically, but it's something we'll be watching closely. She has a harder time in noisy environments particularly.
Hannah had 3 teeth pulled by her oral surgeon about 2 months ago. She racked up with the tooth fairy for 3 teeth since she was so brave! The teeth were pulled so they'd have time to heal before her did surgery in that area of her mouth this summer. Actually, in about 2 weeks. Hannah will have her bone graft surgery to repair the hole in her gumliine left from her cleft. They will be taking bone from her hip and packing it in her gumline where there currently is no bone. This will give her permanent teeth a place to anchor to when they come in. She'll be on a soft diet again for a while (not sure exactly how long, but after her regular palate repair it was a month!). She'll also have some activity restrictions for a couple weeks.

Hannah just finished 1st grade and she had a wonderful year. She's reading like crazy and one of her favorite things to do is have me give her math problems to solve in the car. She was also just dismissed from speech. We had a "graduation from speech" celebration and she was quite proud of herself. She should be. She's worked hard and done beautifully. To go from absolutely no speech and language at 3 years old to where she is now at not-quite 7 is amazing. Of course, she's had some great help with her wonderful therapists! She has a few little "quirks" left, but they are so minor that we just address them as they come up and move on. And I've realized - many 6 year olds have a few little language "quirks" anyway. Hannah's extracurricular activity of the year was Girl Scouts. She was a Daisy Scout and she had a blast. Her favorite thing was Daisy Camp this spring (just for the day - they won't spend the night until next year as Brownies). She tried her hand at canoeing and archery. She was pretty good at the archery and she loved every minute of it! She's also made some great friends through her troop this year. I limited Hannah to one activity outside of school (other than church) this year because 1st grade was enough of a jump for her with no nap and homework, etc. It was definately the right decision for us. We're going to have to do some discussion and compromising on 2nd grade I think. Hannah has informed me that next year she wants to do Brownies, dance again (she used to be in dance and took the year off), play basketball, and be a football cheerleader. Oh, and she wants to do baton too. I'm glad she has many interests, but it's too much for me and it will be too much for her. She needs "down time" to just play. And we all need down time to just be together and do things as a family. That time is sometimes hard to come by during the school year. So, we'll be hashing all that out this summer to come up with one or two activities. Hannah celebrated her 4th "Family Forever Day" just a few days ago. 4 years ago I became a mom for the first time..I can't imagine living a life different from the one I live now. Hannah's wish list for the summer included: dumping buckets of water on each other, bubbles, the park, making a hat and a crown, riding her bike, painting all over her whole body (we did that a couple summers ago), going to grandma's house, and fishing.

Ah, summer! I love summer!!

(okay - was going to go back and add some photos..blogger is being crazy. Maybe they'll get added later. But I'm going to post anyway)

Just some pictures..

2009-12-29T19:42:00.018-06:00

Running to the playground (Thanksgiving)

The blessings of life are better when shared (Nov. 2009)

Decorating the tree

It's a stocking, not a sock...having fun being silly

Hannah painted this snowman picture at a friend's birthday party

Let me think, what do I want for Christmas?

"Santa, your glasses are falling down"

I took Hannah and a friend to see the Nutcracker

Playing a game with Bobble, the Elf

Making muffins

Christmas Pictures

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Update

2009-12-28T20:17:00.003-06:00

I know it's been a really long time since I've posted. Don't know that anyone still reads anyway. But that's okay..it's for me mostly. To document and remember. I'm not a scrapbooker! So this is what I'll have to recall these wonderful days.

Since last post..Sadie is doing well. We hit some minor snags with her latest surgery. Basically, after we got the new cast off, her wrist was still bent in some. She had a splint for 3 weeks that was supposed to be a wrist splint/ thumb splint combo. It was okay..but not ideal. But it was the best they could do for both at the same time. After that, we moved to just a wrist splint. It holds her wrist straight beautifully. But, when taken off, it still turns in some. Not bad..but the concern is that since her wrist almost immediately moved back inwards after taking the pin out, that it will slowly continue to move inwards over time. The splint is suppossed to help prevent that until her muscles "tighten up" and her wrist decides where it's permanent location will be. Then we'll move to just wearing the splint at night. She *might* have to have a "revision surgery" on the wrist according to her surgeon, but it's just kind of wait and see for now. Her thumb is doing okay. It looks good. She doesn't use it near as well as her other thumb. But she never used that hand as well as her other hand anyway. Her fingers on that left hand are more stiff and always have been. But she uses it some and she's happy. She picks things up with it and smiles from ear to ear. And she'll sing "Where is Thumbkin" and is thrilled that she can do it with TWO thumbs now. We've been doing OT once a week since she got her cast off and will probably move to every two weeks soon. We go back in a week to Atlanta to have her thumb / wrist checked out again there.

Sadie also had a nephrology appointment to check up on her kidneys early December. It went very well and there are no problems with her kidneys. We don't have to go back for two years this time..so that was good news. Her dr. there reinforced what he told me the first time. He doesn't expect kidney problems in Sadie. But because one kidney was a bit small and because they are located in unusal positions, he wants to keep a check on them "from time to time". But he told us to just enjoy life and "check in every once in a while" as she grows.

Hannah, meanwhile, had an appointment with an oral surgeon back in Nov. She's had a break from all things medical for a while. But that's changing (and she doens't like it one bit). The appointment itself was not a big deal. He looked at dental x-rays, looked briefly in her mouth, and that was pretty much it. But he thinks it's time to do her bone graft to repair the small hole left in her gumline soon. He said she's a great size / weight and age to do it now. And she will need significant orthodontic work at some point afterwards (which we knew). However, she does not need any orthodontic work before the surgery, which is good news. Some kids do before this surgery. I decided to wait until early summer for the surgery, because Hannah will need to be home resting for several days post-surgery. The surgeon felt fine about waiting that long. He does want to pull 3 upper teeth before the surgery if she doesn't lose them before then. She's at the age where she *could* lose them on her own, but seeing as she doesn't have any loose teeth yet, it's not looking very likely. (But I'd love it if she did..much less traumatic!). So, we go back April 1st to have the teeth pulled, and then will have the surgery late May or early June most likely.

Hannah also had an ENT appointment the week before Christmas. I had become slightly concerned about her hearing and her ears back in October. I asked her speech therapist at school to check her hearing, which she did. (because she's wonderful!). I was concerned about Hannah's ear tubes being blocked or falling out. ANd Hannah's LOUDNESS made me wonder if she was having a problem with fluid in her ears and having fluctuating hearing loss. (By the way, turns out Hannah is just LOUD). Anyway, her speech therapist checked her hearing 3 times for me between Oct. and Dec. She failed the first screening, and passed the second two. I could "hear" fluid in Hannah's ears when she pushed her hand up on her ear (gross, I know), so I called and made her an appointment. Hannah HATES anything to do with her ears. I mean, the girl hates shots, but I think she'd rather have a shot than have anyone mess with her ears. So, she was very NOT excited about this appointment.

However, I pulled out the heavy encouragement..complete with Bobble, our magic Elf, appearing in her backpack with a note "be brave! you can hold me!". First, she had a hearing screening. Her hearing was *mostly* normal. She was showing a mild loss at the low frequencies (which is what she showed on her very first audiogram right after adoption..since then she's shown normal though). The audiologist did a bone conduction test afterwards, which bypasses her outer ear and shows what her hearing is like without factoring in fluid, etc. That test was normal. (good news..it just means she has fluid or wax or something). They were also able to tell that her tubes were still in and open. So, then we see the ENT. Hannah lets him look in her ears, and then he (an intern..actually a pretty wimpy intern!) tells her he has to clean the wax out because he can't see. Hannah didn't like that idea at all and started crying, just a little though. But the intern didn't know what to do once she started crying. (we're talking very mild..and still very cooperative!). In the end, he decides he can't do it and to let her see the regular ENT. who is great. But he decided not to clean her ears out anyway because he wants to just remove her tubes. They've been in over 3 years, so it really is time. They don't like to leave them in any longer than that. So, now we have an appointment towards the end of Jan. to have her tubes removed. Very simple outpatient surgery. No IV. Should be easy...except that nothing medical is easy with Hannah so we'll see. The good news is that once the tubes are out and the hole heals, she can get her ears wet without it bothering her so much. And I can put drops in her ears to control the wax (which I can't do with tubes). So, hopefully it will be a good thing. And she hasn't had an ear infection in close to a year. However, he did tell me that sometimes in kids with clefts, they have to put a 2nd set of tubes in. So, they'll re-evaluate in 6 months.

Well, life here has been about much more than medical appointments. I wanted to write about Christmas and some other things..hmm..guess that'll be the next post.

Pick your title: "God is Good" OR "How Sadie Learned Her Colors"

2009-10-30T21:36:00.019-05:00

God is good. God is SO good. I know that, but God has been reminding me of that over and over these last couple days. My heart is overflowing with gratitude for the life God has given me, and the life He is giving me now. I don't know what the future holds, but I want God to be in it whatever it is, because God is good.

Just one (of many!) blessings in my life: little Sadie. Sadie turned 4 a couple weeks ago and now tells everyone "I'm not free (three) anymore!" Today, we had a little trip. By "little", I mean with no notice, I picked her up from her babysitter's house mid-morning and whisked her off to Atlanta. On the Friday before Halloween. On the Magic City Classic AND the Talledega Race weekend...yeah, traffic was chaotic. That was on the way there. On the way home, how about 5 o'clock traffic in Atlanta on Friday afternoon, construction, and rain? It was a LOOOONG day. But God is good..and the trip was good..and God was in it.

Let's start this story back at the beginning. Well, the middle anyway. :-). Sometime late summer 2008, I met with a hand surgeon here locally. Let's just say she didn't thrill me. She may be a wonderful surgeon, but she was not a good listener. She didn't listen to my questions, concerns, and opinions at all. So therefore, I won't ever find out if she's a good surgeon or not. I just wasn't comfortable. My pediatrician referred me to someone else. Much better listener, but he clearly didn't have the experience and knowledge. (remember my story of him googling treatment options?). But then I heard of a surgeon in Atlanta that had a great reputations and had done multiple surgeries on children whose hands were like Sadie's. I went and met with him. At the time, I didn't know if I wanted to do surgery or not. He was wonderful!! He spent a long time with me listening, talking, answering questions, drawing diagrams, etc. He spent a lot of time with Sadie..not just examing her hands but looking at her as a whole..and he was clearly very knowledgeable. He left me with information on pros and cons of what he would reccomend, along with directions to call him if I wanted to ask any more questions. Long story, short..we'd found a surgeon. And for multiple reasons, I decided the surgeries would be a good thing for Sadie in the long run. In December 2008, Sadie had her first surgery on her hands. She had her "floppy" thumb on her right hand removed and this lovely contraption called a fixator placed on her left hand. Here's her hands pre-surgery:

Several weeks after surgery (1st pic is the fixator, 2nd is the fixator with cover over it. Sadie picked red)

After that surgery, I had to turn a screw on the fixator twice a day. That slowly straightened her hand. During this process, Sadie and I travelled to Atlanta periodically to get things checked. It was weekly for the first month. We had a couple minor infections during this..totally normal, cuught quickly, and nothing that a round of antibiotics didn't cure. We were very fortunate. And Sadie tolerated this contraption SO well. And there were really no limitations on what she could do with it. She could shower, but wasn't supposed to immerse it in the water. Just as a precaution, we put a plastic bag over it for particularly messy activities or wet activities. Here's Sadie playing in the snow with the bag over her fixator.

Then in March, Sadie had surgery #2. Here she is at the hospital before surgery #2.

Surgery #2 was to remove the fixator and do a "radialization" of her left hand. In other words, her hand was "straightened" on the end of her ulna bone (she has no radius in the left arm). A pin was placed inside to hold everything in place. Once the bandages were removed a week post-surgery, Sadie got her first cast..orange.

When the cast came off, Sadie got this lovely pink splint with purple straps. And she wore it all day, every day from the time she got it at the end of March until mid-October. Everywhere she went..including swimming, the lake, and the beach. I learned to soak it in vinegar occassionally to get the smell out. Although I don't know if the lake smell ever totally dissapeared. We did take it off for baths.

At the end of May, Sadie had surgery #3. Here she is pre-surgery.

Surgery #3 created a thumb on her right hand (it came from her index finger). Amazing. She came out of surgery all bandaged up. But when the bandages came out, here's the little thumb that was there. A pin was left in the thumb for the time being. It was quickly put in a cast and this time Sadie chose black. She now had a black cast on one hand and a purple and pink splint on the other. We got some stares and questions in public. Sadie took it all in stride.

Once that cast came off (3 weeks later), the pin was removed, and Sadie got this cool blue splint with green straps for her new thumb. She wore it all the time for 3 weeks, except for occupational therapy and showers. Then she wore it just at night for another 3 weeks. She went to OT regularly during those 6 weeks and learned to use her new thumb. So, during this time, we had a blue splint on one hand and a pink splint on the other. (At our agency reunion this summer with Lifeline's facilitator in China)

Sadie has been so proud of her new thumb! And she's quite amazing at what she can do with it now. She can cut with special scissors, color, zip, turn little locks on the door, etc. What she loves most though is singing "Where is Thumbkin?" She has spent the last few months walking up to people in the grocery store and saying "I have a new thumb!".

Finally, in mid-October, Sadie had surgery #4. The PA at her surgeon's office had pity on me and actually faxed me the pre-op paperwork this time to save us a trip to Atlanta the week before surgery. We love them! For so many reasons. Here's some pics of Sadie in the couple weeks leading up to surgery. Just because they were cute and I wanted to stick them in here. First, the beach. Next, Sadie sliding with some friends at her 4th birthday party. Finally, pre-op.

This time, the pin was being removed in her left wrist (the one that'd been there since surgery #2 in March) and she was getting a new thumb on her left hand. When the bandages came off, Sadie chose pink for her cast this time. And then at a fall festival at Hannah's school a few days later, she got pink hair to match her cast. (Hannah had purple hair..didn't show up too great in the photo).

We were supposed to have that pink cast on for 3 weeks. But we ran into a little snag. Sadie's left hand was very swollen post-surgery. And when the swelling went down, the cast "slipped". Her dr. had done everything he could to prevent that and minimize the swelling in the first place (including these little "drains" in her thumb at first) but it just happened. Which brings us to today. I took Hannah to school and Sadie to her babysitter's. Then I called the dr. office. I was seriously thinking "I'm a little concerned about this, but I'm sure it's fine and I'm probably over-reacting, but I want them to tell me I'm over-reacing and it's fine". I spoke with the surgeon's assistant who said it was "probably fine" but she wanted to talk to the surgeon to be sure. He was in surgery at the moment however, so she'd call me back. So I went on to work. Mid-morning, she called me to tell me he wanted the cast off, wanted the hand x-rayed, and wanted a new cast put on and he wanted it done today. We talked about me doing it locally instead of going all the way to Atlanta. But in the end, the surgeon wasn't comfortable with that and really wanted me to come to their office. I chose him because of his reputation. He's proved himself to me multiple times already. So I trusted him. So, I made some phone calls to cancel appointments, set up care for Hannah this afternoon, and I picked Sadie up. We headed to Atlanta...We arrived in Atlanta at the surgeon's office just before 4:00 (they're an hour ahead of us). And Sadie is fine. But I'm glad we went. They all know Sadie there and she's charmed them completely! And they take very good care of her. They joke with her and laugh with her..but they're serious about doing a good job. I sat in amazement. It was the end of the day on a Friday, and they treated her like their first patient Monday morning. or better. I know they stayed late just to make sure everything was okay with her. The surgeon wasn't there (it was his day to be in surgery at the hospital all day). But he might as well have been. They took pictures and e-mailed them to him in surgery. And they took pictures of the x-rays and sent him those too. They texted and talked back and forth. And seriously, he might as well have been standing there. He directed everything..do this..do that..another x-ray, an x-ray in a different postion..hold the hand in this position while you put the new cast on..wanted an x-ray in the cast to be sure..etc. And the bottom line is Sadie did need a new cast..but she's fine. No damage was done. But it could have been if the problem hadn't been corrected. Her new thumb wasn't the problem..it was fine. The problem was when the cast slipped, it made her wrist bend inwards. We've spent much time and surgery and effort getting that wrist to turn out..not in. Sadie will be able to turn it in when she needs to. But it did not need to sit in that position immobile or it could have started to permanently move back inwards. But they were able to get it in the correct position in the new cast, and everything is good. God is good. Oh yeah, and Sadie chose orange this time for her cast. Because it matched her butterfly wings of her Halloween costume. I actually told her that was why we were going back for a new cast: so she could pick out another color to go with her costume!

As I was driving home, I was amazingly not stressed at all about the traffic or the time or anything. I felt God's hand on my life and my children's lives and I felt like we were being very well taken-care of. Today was just one example. I listened to my insticts say something wasn't right. I had dr.'s I trusted who also trusted me that if I was concerned, they wanted to check it out. I had dr.'s who didn't take the "easy way out", but insisted I see them, today, right now. And they stayed late to make it happen. And a surgeon who directed everything from an OR across town! I'm so grateful to have found them. Sure, driving to Atlanta 21 times over the past 10 months (today was the 21st time!) has been a bit of a pain at times. But only because I get caught up in convenience and busyness at times. But when I truly stop and think of the care Sadie gets there...it's a no-brainer. I'd drive 21 more times over the next 10 months in a hearbeat. But luckily, I don't have to. If all goes well, we'll go back in a week and a half, and then in probably another 3 weeks, and then probably 1 more time after that. And that's it. These two pics show how Sadie feels about our treks to Atlanta.

(actually, she seems to mostly enjoy the trips..and when she gets bored, she sleeps.) I am incredibly blessed..God is good. Just one example of how Good He is. Now, if I had not chosen to do any surgery on Sadie, I would be just as blessed and God would be just as good...and Sadie would be just as delightful, charming, and amazing. But because I *did* choose to do surgery, I sure am glad God put the right team in place for Sadie and that everything has worked out so well. And yes, Sadie has had a multitude of colors on her arms / hands during this past year. And yes, when we started, she knew no colors. Now she knows them all. :-)

Summer: Going, Going, Gone

2009-08-07T22:45:00.002-05:00

Just found this today..I wrote it in August!! Yeah, I'm behind. But it made me smile to read it..so I'm posting it.

It's over. Officially. I start back to work on Monday and school for the kids start Thursday. It's been a good summer and we've done a lot. We've had some accomplishments too. Here's a little run-down at what we've learned this summer.

1. Hannah learned to swim. And to trust God. At the same time. It was fun to watch her progress. She can now swim about half the length of the YMCA pool and back. She can also jump in unassisted and swim to her instructor and can float on her back. And she totally gives God the credit for all that. She was nervous in her first session about taking off the "floatie" they have the beginners wear the first few days. Nervous doesn't actually describe it - terrified! I'm talking she was clinging and crawling up her teacher's back and wouldn't let go. Her teacher finally shoved her off (in as nice a way as she could..but her options were a bit limited) and Hannah made it to the wall. Lots of cheers and claps and then it was time to try it again. Did Hannah have confidence? nope. More clinging and fear. Repeat again the next day. It was definately a fear thing and not an issue of inability. Hannah could swim anywhere well with the floatie. Finally, one day on the way to swimming lessons I suggested we pray about it. Hannah agreed so we prayed that God would give her courage and help her swim without her floatie. What do you know..she took it right off and swam to the wall with no coaxing. Several times. From then on, it was never an issue. She went from "I can't do it at all" to swimming half the length of the pool very confidently. In her second session of swim lessons, Hannah's new task was to jump in the water and swim out to her instructor. The first few days, she reached for his hand. She would try to pump herself up 'I'm going to do it myself' and at the last minute, she would get scared and refuse to jump without his hand. So, we prayed again that she would have courage to jump in and swim. That day, she hesistated slightly, but she did it. She jumped in on her own and swam to her instructor. And then she started YELLING at the TOP OF HER LUNGS "It's a miracle! It's a miracle!". She turned to the kid next to her and said "God just made me have courage in my heart to jump and then he made me just POP back up out of the water so I could swim! It's a miracle!".

2. Hannah learned to ride her bike without training wheels. All it took was to come upon some friends who were a year older riding their bikes in the same parking lot we went to practice in. Competition set it and Hannah decided she would master it too. And she did..in less than half an hour. Although remembering to brake took an extra day. :-)

3. Hannah overcame her slight disgust of creepy crawly things enough to actually enjoy playing with worms at the lake. I'm sure the fact that her friend Joy loved playing with worms had something to do with this.

4. Hannah memorized the fruits of the spirit..in song form.

5. Hannah learned that all babies don't actually come from China. :-)

6. While Sadie didn't learn to swim, she did learn to enjoy the pool. You know, as long as she had her life vest on and mommy was just an arm's reach away.

7. Sadie learned the difference bewteen a fork and a spoon. Sounds simple, I know. But life is so much easier now that I can count on my helpful 3 year old to put the right utensils on the table. It's the little things. :-)

8. Sadie learned most of her colors. Still working on a couple, but she's getting there.

9. Sadie learned to sing her ABC's, although she doesn't give us any credit for that. When asked "where did you learn that?", she delights in answering "in china!". Actually, that's become her answer to everything lately. "I learn that in CHINA!"

10. Sadie has learned to use her new thumb! Quite well, in fact. In fact, she's doing it well enough that her OT said to me last week "I'm comfortable with you not coming for a while and just continuing to play and encourage her on your own.".

11. I learned that as much as I think my children have beautiful voices and love to listen to them sing, a 20 minute car ride is my limit for listening to them sing their "special songs" (i.e. totally made up on the spot songs, even though Sadie insists she learned all hers in China!). sorry, but true.

12. I learned that when a preschool remote control toy car thingy has a warning label that says "adult supervision required. If child's hair comes in contact with moving wheels, entanglement can occur", I should pay attention. It actually can happen. Thankfully, no one was hurt and it just took a quick little "snip" to free the child from the toy.

13. I learned that no matter how long summer vacation is, there's never enough time to complete half the "projects" I said I'd do at the beginning of the summer.

14. I learned that some things are more important than those projects anyway. You know, things like teaching a child to ride a bike, watching the girls swim, making forts out of all the blankets, watching the impromptu puppet shows in living room, etc.

15. I learned that in between all the fun play times with the kids and the "projects" that are being procrastinated, there's still time for naps!

I love summer!

Fun Times

2009-07-24T16:38:00.013-05:00

Last week, we headed to Hannah's annual cleft clinic visit (and it's finally "annual" for us and not every 6 months! yeah!). It was a good visit and not too long. Everything is looking good. We got a good report from the speech therapists there - they thought Hannah was sounding very good. There are a few speech errors that remain, which I knew, but overall they felt like she was doing great. Her surgeon was also happy with how she was doing. Her hearing was not tested this time since she had good reports the last few times. They will test again next year. We were out well before lunch time. We will be going to see an oral surgeon in the next 6 months for a consultation on when to repair that last hole remaining in her gum line. Hannah's cleft dr. thinks it's still too early, but he likes to send his patients to the oral surgeon on the early side just so we know what to expect. But the fact that Hannah hasn't lost any of her baby teeth yet points to it being early for her still. When we go, they will do x-rays to see where all her permanent teeth are and to estimate when they will come in. The surgery will be planned to occur before her permanet teeth (on the top) are ready to come in.

Last weekend, we headed to Tuscaloosa to visit a place that holds great memories for me. It was our Wesley Foundation (campus ministry) reunion. It was fun to visit with some old friends, and the girls had a blast hanging out on the campus with the other kids.

Then, we headed to the lake for a few days, also with a couple friends from college and their families. We had a great time swimming, fishing, roasting hot dogs and marshmallows, making s'mores, and more. The girls played in the sand, caught frogs, played with worms, and did a whole lot of giggling with their friends. And then at night, we adults put the kids to bed and then enjoyed hanging out, chatting, reminiscing about older days, and catching up on current days. You know those friends that you can seriously not see for a very long time, and then when you get together it's just easy and comfortable? I'm lucky to have some of those friends and enjoyed spending time with them this week. I guess I'm also lucky that one of those friends has access to an amazing lakehouse in her family! Fun times!

We have a little more fun planned in the next couple weeks - and then...(drum roll)..back to school! Hard to believe it's almost here.

Summer Fun

2009-07-12T08:19:00.019-05:00

Some of what we've been up to in between dr. appointments and speech and OT (which actually we've had a whole lot less appointments than last summer)

Fun play spaces: Who knew if I just pushed the couch out from the wall and hung a blanket up...I'd have 2 whole hours to sit and read while these two happily amused themselves in their new play space!

Hannah enjoyed a week of "baton camp" (and no, not really a camp, but classes for a week) at a nearby church.

Vacation Bible School: Sadie wasn't actually old enough to participate this year and was in the nursery most of the time. But that didn't stop her from their end-of-the-week performance. She just marched herself up to the stage, squeezed in by Hannah, and acted like of course she knew all the songs and she belonged there.

Painting and simple crafts: We love to do this kind of stuff on those really really HOT afternoons.

Playing in the water:

Puppet Shows in the Living Room:

And this weekend, we attended Lifeline's annual China reunion. I had a great time visiting with old friends and making some new ones too. The girls had a great time running, playing, jumping, and swinging.

I love this sweet picture of Sadie with Lily, Lifeline's facilitator in China.

Hannah had a great time playing with our friend Quan.
Sweet Candace poses for a pic with Sadie.

More fun days coming soon...July seems to be our month for reconnecting with old friends..so stay tuned. :-)

Happy New Thumb

2009-06-30T20:58:00.004-05:00

Last week was a big week in our house - Sadie got her cast off. She did great and is loving her new thumb. She's not using it a lot yet, for a couple reasons. It's in a splint almost all the time (we take it off for baths, occupational therapy, and some "supervised play time of a few minutes"). It's also just going to take some time and therapy for her to learn to use it. But she can wiggle it a little, and she can now hold things between her thumb and first finger. Her finger does most of the work at this point, but it's a start. In another 2 weeks, we'll move to just using the splint at night, and I expect her to start using it a lot more at that point. But so far, so good. :-) She told her doctor "thank you for my new thumb"..isn't she the sweetest?? (she also told her doctor that his tech needed a raise, but she had some prompting on that one! She's totally charmed the whole office!!)

Stars All Around

2009-06-16T21:37:00.004-05:00

I had an amazing weekend. Many of you know how I spent it, but for those who don't, I spent it with 23 beautiful "stars" - teenage girls who are incarcerated. As part of a team, I entered a juvenile facility nearby and for 3 days got to love these girls who we call "stars" as we encourage them to let the lights God has placed in them shine as stars. I can't describe it fully to you. I'd actually done it before, years ago. And I had a great time and loved it and loved the girls then. But it was different this time..in a good way. Maybe because my role before was more in the background and this time I was right in the middle of the girls..maybe because I'm a bit older (*almost* old enough to be some of these girls' mother..but not quite! ha!)..maybe because I am a mother and while these were teenagers, I could see them as little girls, someone's daughters. I don't know exactly why..but they completely grabbed my heart. I sat at a table with 4 of these girls, along with some other team members, and we became a family, discussing everything from their stories and our stories to shoes (they are teenage girls after all!), to prayer, love and forgiveness, to their hopes and dreams for the future, to jokes and funny stories. Sometimes, it felt like I was talking to a group of youth in my church. Other times, one of them would say something that would bring the stark reality of where we were right back into focus..they have had tough lives, tougher than most of us can even imagine. They weren't all particularly "easy" to love - they giggled and goofed off during the serious moments, shut down at times, had moments of "attitudes", and couldn't decide whether they wanted to trust us or not. They accused each other of taking things that they had simply misplaced. But I did love them - a lot. And slowly, little by little, they did start to try to trust us just a little..they started to let us into their lives, and share with us. They apologized to each other. They began to forgive others, maybe even themselves. I hope they began to believe in themselves..to know their worth in the eyes of God. I think I might have said some things right. I know I said some things wrong. God did everything right. We laughed a lot. We sang, and played games, and prayed, and talked, and listened. We cried some. We had a birthday party. I can't describe it to you..the look on their faces when the room was decorated, they had cakes, they had presents, and we told them we were celebrating their lives. It was incredible. Simply incredible. Can you imagine..being 16 and never having had a birthday party? Never being told your life was worth celebrating? It was a fun celebration, but also a holy moment. In addition to the girls I sat with all weekend, I got to know a few others a little too. One in particular, I had the opportunity to serve as a guide for the weekend. I met with her several times, shared favorite Bible verses with her, talked about different things, listened to her story. She captured my heart as well. She was actually easy to love..she smiled at me from the beginning, she talked easily to me and was eager to share with me, and yet she too has suffered pain and hurts that ended her up in that place. And all of them have been on my heart and mind this week. Many changes were begun in their hearts. Some of them left the weekend obviously different people than when we began. Some of them, you had to look really close to see a hint of a change, and a couple of them - I'm not sure what they got out of the weekend, if anything. But we loved them and we shared God's love with them. And what God does with that is in His hands and in His timing now. I'm praying for all of them. I can't share their names and stories with you..but would you please say a prayer for them too? Just tell God you're praying for His stars - he knows them well! :-) And for those of you who have been praying for them already and who participated in our prayer chain - thank you. God heard your prayers and lives were and are being changed.

Where oh where did May go?

2009-06-02T20:10:00.012-05:00

Catching up..May has been jam-packed. At least it's felt that way.

Last post: Sadie's "Family Forever" Day.

Since then, we've had:

1. Hannah's first dance recital. Can I just say, it was so much fun. She had a blast and smiled from ear to ear the entire time she was on stage. (The whole 2 minutes! ha). Those who know her "in real life" already know that she's a true performer. Whether it's dancing or singing on stage, or simply being our home "drama queen". Anyway, her recital was precious and she can't wait to do it again. I mean, she got to wear a fancy, frilly costume, got to wear make-up, had her hair in a bun, and danced on stage with "everybody watching ME!", got flowers, and got to go to a late dinner at cracker barrell (her choice, because "they have rocking chairs") and have ice-cream for desert. It was her dream come true day. And icing on the cake was that nana, granddaddy, and grandma came to watch. Grandma even spent the night so the girls could have a "tea party" the next morning.

2. I found an occupational therapist for Sadie. One who is getting her OT covered under insurance and who is flexible with hours. She saw me on a school day at 6:00 p.m. for our first visit! LOVE that! Of course, now that it's summer, we're seeing her earlier. But nice to know she's that flexible when school starts back. Sadie's only been twice, but so far, so good.

3. Hannah had field day at school. She had a blast and got hot, sweaty, dirty, and wet! What fun!

4. Sadie brought home worms from her babysitter's house. Yes, wiggly, crawl-in-the-mud worms. Then, she pronounced them "gross" and wanted nothing more to do with them. Hannah meanwhile, wanted to keep them as pets. um.right. We kept them 24 hours, then let them free in the wild (otherwise known as my backyard). Good-bye worms..wiggle away and be free!!

5. School Ended!! (for my fellow teachers, no explanations needed on how busy those last few weeks were...ah, but now it's summer!)

6. I took my National Boards Assessment. Whew! I'm officially done. I felt pretty good about it, but won't know scores until probably November.

7. Hannah and Sadie played in the sprinkler in the rain. (not huge, but they thought it was a big deal!)

8. Hannah's Family Forever Day! It deserves it's own post, but, well..it's not getting one at least tonight. But I celebrated 3 years with this sweet, spunky girl. She amazes me with her courage, her joy, and her intenseness for life. She's reading and writing. Her speech is coming along very well. She's confident and kind and helpful (mostly!) She has a true faith and regularly prays for friends who are sick or hurting. She has lots of faith questions. When it's her turn to say the blessing at meals, she thanks God for food, but she also often says "and thank you for giving me my family". Of course, when she was upset at me recently, she also told me she wished "The Wiggles" (kids song group) were her family because they were more fun! Hannah loves to argue and freely admits it. "But I like to argue..it's fun!" Maybe she'll be a lawyer one day. Or an actor..see drama queen info above. Hannah is drawing some amazing pictures these days as well. Her idol is Hannah Montana, even though she has never seen the tv show. She says Hannah Montana is fancy and that's why she likes her. And Hannah loves to dress fancy. Her favorite days are the days she wears a "fancy dress". But she doesn't mind getting in the dirt and playing either. Hannah "gets" her story this year in a way that's different from the last two. She understands not all, but a little more. She's been very interested in the concept of her birthmother lately. She asked me if the lady that handed her to me (on her video) was her birthmother. It wasn't - it was a worker from her orphanage. She also informed my good friend who is pregnant "you are a birthmother!" Hannah has grown so many ways this year, including learning to be a big sister. She aggravates and fusses with Sadie some..but overall, she's great with her! She watches out for her, takes care of her, and is so excited to have a little sister. She recently told me "you know what my favorite part of China (when we went last year) was?..getting my sister!!" Hannah chose a chinese restaurant for dinner and we enjoyed watching her video from China. She also tried on her gotcha day clothes, as is our tradition. She got them on, but I think this might be the last year they actually go on. She got a big kick out of how much she has grown. I can't imagine not having this amazing child as my daughter and I'm so thankful God knew exactly which child should be my first!

May 29, 2006

May 29, 2009

9. Sadie had surgery again. We spent a couple nights in Atlanta last week as Sadie had surgery to literally create a thumb on her right hand. Pretty amazing stuff. She did GREAT! She now has a thumb, that I haven't seen yet due to all the bandages. But, we head back to Atlanta tomorrow to have it checked out so I'll get to see it then I guess. She's adapted very well to having her dominant hand out-of-commission and it's actually helping her learn to use her left hand more..something we've been working on in OT anyway. She's started finger feeding herself with her left hand. Some things are hard..such as spoon-feeding, etc. But she's happy to open her mouth like a little bird to let me feed her. :-) She seems to enjoy the "royal treatment" and has started to issue "commands" for a pillow, a toy, etc. ha ha!! She deserves a little royal treatment! While she and I were in Atlanta, Hannah went to the beach with my friends Beth and Wayne (Nana and Granddaddy) and their daughters and grandkids. Hannah had a blast, and especially seemed to enjoy playing with her 8 year old cousin Elisabeth. (PICTURES of Sadie pre and post surgery coming soon)

10. I had my year post-placement with my agency for Sadie today. It really isn't that newsworthy and it was in June, not May..but I enjoyed meeting and talking to Amy, their new post-placement SW. Had a great conversation, enjoyed her visit, the girls fussed and argued over toys while she was here..but hey..she has kids too so she knows. :-) The main thing about this visit was that it was the last "official" step for me with Lifeline. Kind of weird. I've been either in a home study, preparing a dossier, waiting to travel, traveling, or in the post-placement phase for one of the girls ever since October 2005 when I first met with them. Now three and a half years later, I have two beautiful amazing girls and am finished with it all. If anyone from lifeline is reading this - WE LOVE Y'ALL and appreciate all of you more than words can say!! And if you're one of my friends who have been "thinking about adoption" (come on, I know you're there!), call me. I have a GREAT agency to reccomend!

And that, friends, is what we've been up to and why there haven't been any posts lately...just didn't have any time left!! But now, let SUMMER BEGIN!

Happy Family Forever Day Sadie!

2009-05-05T20:07:00.007-05:00

(I originally wrote this post last Tues. but am just getting around to posting it)

So hard to believe it's been 1 year! This year has flown by so fast...I guess because it's had so much packed into it. Today we celebrated my sweet, but getting spunkier by the day (in a good way!) little one. As is tradition in our house, Sadie tried her "gotcha day" clothes on. They still fit! Actually, they're still too big - especially the outer layer. too funny. I got her exactly one year ago on May 5 and she had three layers of clothing on. She was so hot! Layers 1 and 2 were split pants..which completely amused both of my girls. Here's a pic of her in her 3rd layer:

She was so well-taken care of and loved by the staff at her orphanage. Even their choice of clothing for her represents that..it was clearly chosen with love and care and they wanted her to look special. For an orphanage that had almost nothing materially, I am convinced the staff loved and cared deeply for the children. I saw some of it when I visited. I have seen a lot of the fruits of their efforts in Sadie during this past year. She came pretty much with the idea that "everyone will love me" and of course, everyone did. She has so much confidence, and nothing slows her down. She has been to more doctor's appointments than I can keep up with and had two surgeries. And she still charms every medical professional she sees with her cooperation and personality. She now receives speech and her speech therapist described working with Sadie like "a breath of fresh air" because she's so cooperative and energetic and easy-going.

Hannah and Sadie are so different in so many ways, and yet they absolutely belong together. They sing together, play together, destroy my living room together, fuss and argue and whine some, and absolutely love each other more than words can express. Whenever I take Sadie on a "road trip" (dr. visit in Atlanta), she spends the whole drive saying over and over "go get Hannah, okay..don't forget, go get Hannah". They look out for each other in groups and I couldn't ask for a better matched set of sisters. Hannah drew an absolutely precious picture for Sadie today of her whole family (which includes many of our extended church family as well!) and gave it to Sadie as a present today before we headed off to celebrate with dinner at a chinese restaurant.

Sadie's courage and determination inspire me, her smiles and hugs melt my heart, and her silly antics make me laugh. She is a joy and a treasure and my heart is still blown away at all God has done to create our family over the past few years. completely, totally blown away.

The Princess Who Talked Mean!

2009-04-20T21:25:00.006-05:00

A story about Hannah - this doesn't represent her "best" side, but I have to admit it's funny. Her teacher came to me this afternoon to show me something Hannah had drawn and written at school. She had finished her work early and turned it over on the back to do her own thing, something her teacher encourages. She drew a girl with a beautiful flowing dress (big dress - think prom dress!). She drew speech bubbles coming out of the girl's mouth with these words:

"I hat yoou" (I hate you)
"Yoou meG" (You mean - she actually says it with a slight g sound)
"You Bose" (You Bossy)
"Cit" (Quit)

Good writer, huh? I'm proud of her emerging writing skills. Her choice of words, however...She's not allowed to use the word "hate", and we've been talking a lot about "nice words" lately. Oh, the things they learn as they get older!! ughh. Anyway, in a different color marker, she had another speech bubble with the words "I soRe" (I sorry).

So, I was embarrassed. Her teacher wasn't showing it to me for that reason, she thought it was funny. And it was... I guess at least she's getting her frustrations out on paper by saying the things there I won't let her say out loud. Maybe I should buy her a journal!!

So tonight, as I was going over her work in her folder, I pulled out this same paper. I complimented Hannah on the work part on the front. Then turned it over and looked at the back again. This was our conversation.

Me: Tell me about this
Hannah: That girl said "You mean! you bossy! I hate you! QUIT!"
Me: Why did she say those ugly things?
Hannah: Because she's mean!
Me: Who is this girl?
Hannah: A princess.
Me: Who is she saying those mean things to?
Hannah: Her sister..uh..her older sister.
Me: What does this say? (pointing to the one in different color)
Hannah: She said "I sorry"
Me: Why did she say that?
Hannah: Because she was mean!
Me: That's a beautiful dress she has on. Is she going somewhere special?
Hannah: She's going to a ball..you know..a ball where people dance. She's going to a dance.
Me: That seems special. What do you think her mommy is going to say when she finds out she's been saying all these things that are not nice? Do you think her mommy will still let her go to the ball? Will she be in time-out?
Hannah: Her mommy will still take her to the ball. Because her mommy will FORGIVE (said loudly) her. She will just FORGIVE her and still take her to the ball.

(insert quick prayer by me for HELP!)

Me: Well, It's a good thing I'm not this princess' mommy. Because I would forgive her and still love her, but I sure wouldn't let her go to a ball. Because balls are special and only for princesses who know how to use kind words. She'd have to stay home since she doesn't know how to do that. Good thing I'm *your* mommy instead of hers. Because I'm sure *YOU* know how to talk nice and kind like a real princess!

Hannah: yeah!

SO..what do I do with THAT? :-)
The girl definately keeps me on my toes!!

Happy Easter!

2009-04-12T20:38:00.008-05:00

*Please continue to keep Mary in your prayers! She's still in the hospital, had another surgery a couple days ago, still feeling rotten!* www.caringbridge.org/visit/princessbob

Happy Easter! We've had a great weekend here. We've had lots of fun hunting eggs, playing outside, making a cake (and licking the icing) and enjoying the weekend. Through it all, we've been telling and retelling and retelling that wonderful story that makes it all mean something, the Easter Story. We've read it, watched it on video, talked about it, and used Hannah's "Ressurection Eggs" she made at church last week to tell the story over and over. And honestly, it's been wonderful and tough at the same time. Wonderful to see the girls so interested and excited about the story. Mostly Hannah..Sadie's still a bit young. But Hannah at 3 would get excited and say "yeah, Jesus is alive". That's kind of where Sadie's at. Now though, Hannah can tell you the whole story..from the entry into Jerusalem through the last supper, Judas' betrayal of Jesus, praying in the garden, the crucifixtion, the tomb, the women coming to find the tomb empty the next morning...I mean..she can basically do it all. And it's great. But tough too..to see the story fresh through her eyes. She's had so many questions: why did they kill Jesus? Why did Jesus have to die? Didn't it hurt? Did he cry? Did he scream? Was Jesus scared? Was the cross heavy? Why didn't God help him? Why did Judas "trade" (betray) Jesus for money? That was not nice!! Why didn't the people who killed Jesus have to go to jail? What is sin? (umm..have you ever tried to explain that to a 5 year old? not so easy..) But Jesus didn't do anything wrong!! Her sense of the injustice of it all was obvious in her tone of voice and in her facial expressions. She would randomly ask these questions throughout the week (usually a bunch at once, then would go off to play and come back with some more later). Sometimes I didn't know if we'd ever get to Sunday and the ressurection! She was stuck in the stories of the week..in the darkness and the questions and the not understanding. I guess that's how the disciples felt too. I found myself wanting to hurry her along to Easter..to the ressurection..brush off some of the questions and let's get to the good part! But she would have none of that! So, we talked and talked and I answered the best I could those tough questions over and over. I don't know exactly how much she comprehended..I don't know how satisfying my answers were..and that's okay. I'm proud of her for asking the questions, and staying with it. For seeking an understanding even when it wasn't easy. And she helped me to view the story again with a fresh sense of awe, and mystery, and compassion, and sadness, and wonder, and finally..joy. Because in the end, He is RISEN!

And that makes all the difference in the world. So today, we remembered and celebrated that Jesus is Alive! Happy Easter!

(Hannah found these branches from a bush I trimmed on the driveway today. She decided to pretend they were palm branches and was waving them around shouting "HOSANNAH!")

What We've Been Up to Lately

2009-03-31T20:30:00.006-05:00

First, Mary is still in the hospital. She was feeling better, but is now sick. Another surgery coming sometime soon..but not sure when. Keep her in your prayers and visit www.caringbridge.org/visit/princessbob

The week after Sadie's surgery was my spring break. We took it easy around here the first part of the week. The end of the week, we headed to my parents in north GA. The girls had a blast on that Thurs. riding around in a wagon they had.

I then got up very (VERY) early Friday morning and left the girls' at my parents for the weekend. I headed to a place I love: Camp Sumatanga. I had the wonderful priveledge of being part of the team for a spiritual retreat weekend for young adults (YAC - young adult chrysalis). It was an amazing weekend that I really believe made a difference in the kingdom of God both in the lives of the young adults that participated, as well as in us "older" young adults. It made a difference in me in ways I'm not sure I can quite articulate. It was wonderful to be there and be "away" for the weekend. I dont' want to say I didn't miss the girls, because I did. But, I didn't worry about them (they were, after all, being spoiled rotten by grandparents!) and I was very content to be where I was doing what I was doing..singing songs of praise and being quiet and still, making new friends and reconnecting with some old friends too, laughing, worshipping, sharing, and listening..it was just a great weekend.

I then met my mom to pick up the girls (who yes, had a blast and were loaded up with new clothes and toys..). And while I was completely content and happy to be at camp for the weekend, I was also completely content and happy for the weekend to end and to spend some time with the sweetest two little girls ever!

The next day, we headed back to Atlanta for Sadie's bandages to come off. Her wrist looked good, though still swollen and bruised a bit. The x-rays looked great and her surgeon is very pleased with everything. They set her up with a bright orange cast (her choice) and we headed home. She gets the cast off in 3 more weeks. And I don't know what she plans to be the first thing she does, but I plan for her to soak in the bathtub!! For a while!!

Finally, I had to face reality that spring break was over. I headed back to school for the last quarter of the year. I also finished my portfolio I've been working on all year for my national board certification. I mailed it off yesterday. I thought I'd be so relieved to have it out of my hands, but truthfully, when I got back in the car from the post office, I was simply tired. :-) I still have the assessment test to take at the end of May, and I won't know the results until November. But, it does feel good to have that big portfolio off my list of "things to do". :-)

Please Keep Praying for Sweet Mary

2009-03-26T19:58:00.003-05:00

It's been a while since I last posted. I updated you that my sweet little friend Mary was home from the hospital and doing well. Well, I'm sad to say that it didn't last long. She has been back in the hospital for the last week. She's had it really rough. The doctors can't figure out what's going on. They keep saying her shunt appears to be working right, but yet Mary's symptoms say that it's not. She's had another surgery, and is looking at still possibly ANOTHER one in the next few days. My heart just breaks for her and for her sweet sweet family. Mary's mama Jana is TIRED. Tired of being in the hospital, tired of watching her baby girl in pain, tired of doctors not knowing how to fix it, tired of surgeries, tired of not having her family together, you get the picture. Please keep Jana, Mary, and her family in your prayers. They are a very special family and Mary is a very special little girl who lights up every room she walks in. Her life has been truly miraculous. Before she was born, doctors thought she was going to be much more severely affected and have many serious issues. Instead - Mary has proved them wrong and has done amazingly well. She's 9 years old and sweet and spunky. Please just continue to lift her up to Jesus. If you want to keep up with her as you pray, visit www.caringbridge.org/visit/princessbob
(You can see cute pictures of this beautiful child there too - I've been trying all evening to get one on here and my computer is not cooperating!!)

Quick Update - Sadie and Mary

2009-03-14T11:43:00.004-05:00

***UPDATE***
Mary is home and doing well! :-)

Hi friends,
Sadie is doing well. Her surgery went very well and her surgeon was very pleased with the way her wrist looked. I haven't seen it yet because it is covered with a splint and bandaged up. I won't see it until her post-op appointment next week. But it's good to know he was happy with the results. She was a trooper. I LOVE that the surgery center in Atlanta allows parents to accompany the kids to the OR. I wish Children's in Birmingham did. I know it could make it worse in some situations...and Atlanta does reserve the right to say no. (I guess if you're freaking out they might tell you no..). But for Sadie, it helps so much. I think it would ease things for Hannah too - but her surgeries are all here and it's not an option here. Anyway, I took her to the OR, held her until they were ready, put her on the bed and held her hand and rubbed her head while they put the mask over her face. Quick, painless, and easy for her. She wasn't a bit upset. After she was asleep, I was escorted out and back to a waiting area. She woke up pretty easily too. She cried some, but settled pretty quickly. She drank some juice, I got her dressed, and we were out of there. She slept most of the day and a good bit yesterday too. But she's been eating, and when she's awake she has been playing some. Today, she's been awake all day and pretty spunky and playful. I can tell her arm bothers her some when the pain meds start wearing off..but I can also tell that's better today than yesterday. Overall, she's done great!!
Hannah also did well staying with my friends. She told me "I was brave". She's glad to be home though and she and Sadie have played very well together today. My challenge (again..we faced this in Dec.) is going to be keeping Hannah calm enough to get Sadie all wound up...for a few days at least. But we are all doing well..thanks for the thoughts and prayers.

Mary, my sweet little friend from church I posted about, is doing okay I think. She's had it rough though. Since I last posted, she's had two more surgeries. The last I heard, she seemed to be doing better after her last one a couple days ago. Keep praying for her that this is it and she gets to go home soon.

Oh - just a little tidbit I learned..useless information I guess but I found it interesting. For my kids' surgeries (4 total for both of them), they've always been asked what flavor gas they wanted..strawberry, grape, bubble gum, etc. I (naively I guess) really thought they had different flavor gasses to put them to sleep. Why not? The dentist has different flavors of flouride. This was at two hospitals in two different states. Anyway, we get in the OR and as I'm holding Sadie in my lap (they're not quite ready for her yet), I catch one of the anesthesiologist team members holding the mask down where Sadie can't see it and he takes out a LIP SMACKER (you know..scented chapstick) and rubs it all over the inside of her mask. I laughed and asked "is that really how you flavor the gas?" and he winked and said "shh". He said he bet that I thought it was something more technical than that. I had to agree..
Anyway, useless info..but I found it interesting. I guess the moral is if your kid is going to have surgery and has an absolute favorite flavor..buy the lip smacker and slip it to the anesthesiologist! (I did ask him to put some on her lips when they were done because they were chapped! I was half-kidding!)

Another Prayer Request - for Sadie

2009-03-10T19:29:00.002-05:00

Hi friends,
Sadie is having her 2nd surgery on her arm this Thursday (3/12/09). We will be heading to Atlanta tomorrow (Wed) evening and will be back Friday. She will have the fixator off her arm (YEAH! She keeps saying "Bye bye bar!") and a procedure called "radialization" that will finish straightening her hand (it involves some technical stuff including some tendon transfers to balance out her hand and that will hopefully prevent it from turning back inwards again). She will come out of surgery with a splint that she will keep for about 10 days until our post-op visit and at that time she will have a cast. I'm not sure yet how long she will have the cast..it kind of depends what all her surgeon has to do once he gets in there. Most likely she will only have it 2-4 weeks.
Please pray for my little Sadie's surgery Thursday morning and her recovery in the days that follow. You can also say a prayer for Hannah, who will be staying with some good friends for a couple of nights...she's come SO far, but it still makes her a bit nervous to spend the night somewhere other than home, especially when she's separated from not just me, but Sadie too.

Please Pray

2009-03-07T20:21:00.003-06:00

Hi Friends,

I have a sweet little 9 year old friend from church at Children's Hospital right now that could use your prayers. Mary has hydrocephalus and has had problems with her shunt several times in the past. I think she's had like somewhere around 13 (not sure exactly) brain surgeries in her life. But right now, she is especially having a hard time. I don't know all the details, but she's had about 4 of those surgeries in the last couple weeks. Right now she's in the middle of 7 days of antibiotics and then she will have another surgery. I heard from Mary's mom this afternoon and she's in a lot of pain with horrible headaches and throwing up a lot. Mary is a precious child who has always had a special place in my heart along with the rest of her family. Please, please say a prayer that she will feel better and the doctors can fix whatever needs fixing so her shunt works and doesn't cause her pain! And you can pray for her mom Jana who is I'm sure quite exhausted! Jana also has two boys at home who I'm sure are missing their mom and little sister! Thanks y'all!

SNOW!

2009-03-01T22:01:00.008-06:00

Snowball fight!

The girls with our next door neighbor and our snowman

I call this guy the "chicken pox" snowman due to the fruit loops stuck all over him!

When the snow started melting, we had huge mud puddles all over the yard. I think Sadie especially enjoyed splashing in the mud as much as anything!!

Enjoying shaved ice "snow cones"

Enjoying hot chocolate and a movie after changing into dry clothes:

33 Months

2009-02-27T21:52:00.000-06:00

33 months. That's pretty random and won't mean much to most people. But Hannah was 33 months old when I adopted her at the very end of May 2006. And today is 33 months later. Which means from this point out, Hannah has been with me longer than she has not. Not an earth-shattering thought or even hugely sentimental. She has been mine since day 1. But, the thought does make me smile.

Want to know how we celebrated today? Well, truth be told, although I've known for a while that today was the 33 month mark, I actually completely forgot once it got here. Didn't think about it at all until just a few minutes ago...long after I put the girls to bed. But, we did do fun things this afternoon..just because. As we headed home from school in the middle of pretty good rain, I was thinking.."well, no outside play today. we're stuck inside for the day and likely most of the day tomorrow according to the weather folks". So, I did what anyone else would have done on a cold, rainy day. I stopped at the store for ice-cream! We came home, changed into pajamas, spread a blanket on the floor, put in a movie, and cuddled under our blankets while eating ice-cream! Fun times!

I hope everyone has a good weekend..and for those of you who live in the general area I do, can't wait to see what this weekend brings. Rain and storms tonight..snow tomorrow night?? Not getting my hopes up..but it would be fun!

My Family Has a Marathon Finisher

2009-02-14T20:03:00.012-06:00

Hannah ran in the Mercedes Kids Marathon this morning and did great! I was so proud of her. She's been "training" all year at school in her P.E. class by running the first 25.2 miles over the course of the year. Then, she and about 25 others from our school ran the last mile on the official course today downtown along with who knows how many other kids (thousands I think!) There were about 7 kindergarteners from our school and two were in Hannah's class. After a group photo, we split up to wander around waiting for our turn. Kindergarten ran last. By the time we lined up for the race, it was so crowded and we couldn't find any of the kids she knew. But, she marched on out there to the starting line anyway..looking a bit nervous but determined. And my determined little girl finished her mile strong. Much to her delight, she received a medal and a powerade. And she convinced me to stop for McDonald's on the way home too.

I was very proud of Hannah for the simple reason that she's mine. And I know that as excited as she was, she was also scared...a mile is a long way for a 5 year old to run with a bunch of kids you don't know when you can't see familiar faces until you near the end (where I was). So - her efforts and bravery were well noted. But there were a handful of others I was proud of too: the third grader who rolled over the finish line in his wheelchair, the 2nd grader who finished behind the last 1st grader (grades started 12 minutes apart with the older grades going first) and had a huge smile on her face as she ran by me, the very small 1st grader with obvious disabilities who ran with her mother and did a limp/walk/run/shuffle all the way, and the parents standing near me who cheered every bit as loud for these kids and for every child that passed by as they did for their own. It was a good day.

Hanging out by the fountain at Linn Park waiting for her age-group to line up.

Here's all the runners from my school before their races.

Hannah with a sweet friend from her class

This is the only picture I got of Hannah running. By the time she got close enough for me to see her and I got my camera focused on her, she was past me!

Checking out her medal after the race

All I wanted was to finish grocery shopping!

2009-02-08T14:41:00.005-06:00

So, after church I took the girls to the grocery store. We usually go Fridays after school or Saturdays after Hannah's dance class. But we had other things going on this weekend and didn't get to it. So - after church it was. I knew it wasn't a great time to go - it was nap time for Sadie. But we didn't need too much and I thought "let's just get it done while we're out". So, I'm pushing the cart (Winn Dixie has new carts by the way...and their "car" carts aren't as big as they used to be so it's great!) and trying to get through the list quickly..when uh-oh, sweet looking older woman is staring at us. Not unfriendly stares...she smiles and says hello. I smile and answer hello and keep looking at the apples I'm deciding on. I don't really want a friendly chat at the moment, I want to get done quickly and get home before the "window of opportunity" for nap time fades away or before someone melts down from being tired. But, sweet looking lady moves in closer and strikes up a conversation with the girls. They tend to draw attention sometimes. When they both glance at her, here's how the conversation goes.

lady: oh, I thought they were twins for a minute. (Hannah is WAY bigger than Sadie by the way). I can see now that they're not.
me: (smile) no, not twins. (move on to the bananas)
lady: (follows us)..No, they're not twins are they?
me: no. This one (pointing to Hannah) is older.
Hannah: She's younger. I'm five and she's three.
lady: How old are you? (to Hannah who just shared that)
Hannah: 5
lady: and how old is the other one?
me: 3 (seeing where this might be headed, I try to move on)
Hannah: (friendly, but no clue where this is going...) We're sisters!
lady: oh, they're sisters?
me: yes.
lady: REALLY? They're really sisters?
me: yes.
lady: I bet you adopted them!
me: yes, I did.
lady: (very smug look on her face) I could tell..I just thought you had.
me: (thinking to myself "gee, is it that obvious I'm not chinese?") keeps silent and smiles and starts off again.
lady: Do they know they're adopted?
me: um..they do now thanks to you. (JUST KIDDING - I didn't say that one, just thought it) yes, they do. Girls, tell the nice lady to have a good day.
Hannah and Sadie: Have a good day
lady: wait..did you get them at the same time?
me: (Hannah's listening..she knows the truth so I decide to be honest) no
lady: But you said they were sisters.
me: They are. Bye (fake smile and walk away quickly!)

I mean really! So, for those who need to know (mostly strangers who will never read this blog..not the people who do read it..but oh well.)

Yes, Hannah and Sadie are adopted.
Yes, they know they are adopted. (Hannah knows, Sadie doesn't understand the word "adopted" yet but she does know she's from China)
Yes, they are my daughters.
Yes, they are my REAL daughters.
Yes, Hannah and Sadie are sisters.
Yes, they are REALLY sisters.

And for the record, I am their only parent. I have only one set of parents. Yet, they have more than one set of grandparents. My only sibling (a brother) doesn't have any children. Yet Sadie and Hannah have three cousins.

Hope that answers all the questions out there! Except of course, most of those questions come from complete strangers like I said..not the wonderful friends or follow adoptive moms who read here. oh well..

And I really don't mind answering quetions..it's just that sensitive questions should be asked outside of my kids' hearing..and by people who either have a reason for asking (like if you want to adopt - you can ask me anything!) or at least by people who know me well enough to ask personal questions. (At the minimum I should at least know your name!)

Rant over. Have a good afternoon!

Chinese New Year 2009

2009-01-31T19:43:00.007-06:00

Chinese New Year was a fun celebration as usual. Last weekend, we headed to a local Chinese restaurant with other adoptive families from our area. The kids looked beautiful in their special clothing of course. They enjoyed crafts, food, balloons, and running around crazy with their friends. They really are a great looking group of kids, but I don't think we ever got them to all look at the camera at the same time. I mean, they had balloons!! The balloons were much more fun to look at than the cameras!

(My sweet little Sadie has developed a spunky attitude from time to time! Notice her sticking her tongue out in this photo!)

We skipped out on the larger CNY celebration in downtown Birmingham this year. I took Hannah the last two years, and I'm going to try to take them both again next year. It's usually fun, but we just needed a "down time" Saturday today so that's what we did. I did teach a Chinese New Year unit this week to my students at school for the second year. Since Hannah is in kindergarten, I also took one of my lessons on China and the new year and presented it to her class. I shared some of the objects we have from China, Hannah shared some Chinese words she knows (of course, she's learned them all from the T.V. show "Nihao Kai-Lan!), I read a story, and then the kids made dragon puppets. They had a great time and seemed very interested. Hannah smiled and was so excited the whole time. She's in a wonderful class this year with a great teacher and she has such sweet friends in her class.

Hannah's teacher shared with me her journal entry for that day. Hannah drew her family. Over Sadie, she wrote a "3", over herself she wrote a "5", and over me she wrote my age. Then under all that she wrote her sentence. "my fameelee is brown and pinkish." She told her teacher "me and Sadie are brown. Mommy is pinkish". It was too cute!

Random Ramblings..Just Because I Can!

2009-01-18T22:19:00.002-06:00

It’s Sunday night, which usually means getting ready for a new week. Except we’re out of school tomorrow! Yeah!! The girls have been in bed since 7:15. Their normal bedtime is 7:30, except on non-school nights we usually go to 8:00. But, they were supposed to be in their “settling down” time eating a little snack and watching a movie. (They don’t get movies or tv on school nights, so it’s a treat). Well, I was upstairs putting away clothes and they got all giggly. Then louder giggly. Aw, so sweet that the sisters are enjoying each other’s company so much. Then LOUDER giggly, and I went to see what they were up to. They were BOTH standing on the very back of the couch ready to jump off (and apparently already had before then). Umm..no. I’m all for fun and all. And Hannah’s got the gymnastics skills to do it and be okay. But Sadie does not. AND she has a fixator on her arm. AND I really didn’t want a trip to the emergency room. AND I’ve had this conversation about safety with them regarding the couch before. More than once. SO, they both ended up in bed immediately. They were not happy with me at all. But my evening is much better this way than it would have been at the emergency room. Theirs is too of course, only they don’t know it. I do wish I'd gotten a photo of them..but I couldn't exactly say "hey, you're in trouble, but smile for the picture first!".

So, that basically means I’ve had much more “free time” than most evenings. And since I’m a procrastinator and don’t intend to get things ready for school until tomorrow night, it means I really have more free time. Thus..this completely random post.

I love my life. I took the girls to the park today. Hannah was riding her bike way out ahead and I was walking with Sadie in the stroller. (because she can’t ride her bike with her arm right now, but it’s okay – she loves the ride. And she has plenty of outside play in our back yard). After a while, Hannah circled back and rode to where we were and said “I want to ride by y’all”. okay. Me and my two precious girls riding / walking at the park on a Sunday afternoon. Everybody happy. Everybody wanting to be there together. It doesn’t get better than that. I love my life.

For some strange reason, I was reflecting on life tonight. Oh, yeah – it was because I had extra time since I put the girls to bed early. I used to be a pretty reflective person. Don’t seem to get around to that much anymore. These days, I reflect on such mundane things as “how long will it take to cook the chicken vs. the spaghetti?” or “should I trust that my newly potty trained 3 year old can make it the whole 25 minute drive to church in panties?” (I did and she did) or “Is it okay to tell my five year old the real difference between boys and girls since she’s asking?” (I did..with instructions not to discuss it at school!) or maybe “how late should I keep them up on Friday night to increase the odds of them sleeping in until at least 7:00 a.m.? (forget it – it backfires every time!). But in the quiet moments of night on a rare free evening, my reflections are very much like they were before I adopted the girls. Some different..yet some the same. Deeper questions come to my heart. Why me? Why has God blessed me SO much? Why has He given me such treasures? Who I am to parent these girls? Why am I so incredibly blessed? And I don’t just mean as far as the girls. But with a job and co-workers I love. With friends I love. Ah..friends. There’s a whole group of relatively new friends I wouldn’t know at all if it weren’t for my girls. Or wouldn’t know as well. Or have in my life as much. And I don’t get to spend time with them much these days..but yet our lives are twisted together in a way that makes me smile to know they know. They know what it’s like to have a child home for those first few months to a year. They know the endless dr. appointments, therapy appointments, adjustments, attachment process, etc. They know the hard things, and they know the great wonderful joyful things (of which there have been many!) We’re going to celebrate Chinese New Year next weekend with just a few of those families. This will be our third time with these same families. Well..some new ones too. And I’m lucky that quite a few of the kids are the same age as my girls. That doesn’t really mean anything to Sadie yet..and it’s just beginning to mean something to Hannah. Although she thinks every child with light brown skin is from China. (even if it’s really India or Mexico – both real life examples!). She’s just beginning to have questions about her story and her history. And I know there will be phases over the years of questions. I hope she finds some comfort..or some understanding..or whatever she needs in knowing other girls her age with similar life stories. Sadie too.

And then there’s my other friends. I don’t want to say old friends, because they’re NOT. Not old in age or old in the sense of prior. They are very much still my very real, very important friends. I guess I just mean not new. The friends who knew me before. And depending on exactly who, it could be before many things. They know. They knew me before ______. And I can’t tell you just how important they are to me. I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without them. And I mean that on so many levels. And as far as my girls, they wouldn’t be here without them. God worked in a mighty to bring them home. And he did a lot of it through these amazing friends who encouraged, listened, prayed, gave, and loved me through the whole experience. I wish so much I could repay all they have done for me. And yet, I can’t. The irony is that a partial result of all they gave on my behalf is that I am now simply …*busy*. But you know what? I think mostly they understand. And I do know, I mean I really really know, that if I needed them, I could pick up the phone and they’d be there for me. Even if we hadn’t talked in a long time. Now how blessed is that?? I hope they know they can do the same. I hope you know, if you’re reading this as one of my real-life friends who I haven’t been good about keeping in touch with, you are still important to me!

Well..this reflection didn’t go at all the way I originally thought it would. .There were other thoughts I intended to share, and got off on a tangent. But perhaps it was exactly the tangent I needed to get off on. And as far as those orginial thoughts, you’ll just have to wonder. Maybe I’ll have another rare free night when I sit and reflect and then have the urge to blog about it. But don’t expect it too soon! In summary, I love my life. God is good. Good night!

(And if you want to see updates on Sadie’s arm..scroll down. Two posts in one night!)

Sadie's hand update and developmental milestones!

2009-01-18T18:20:00.010-06:00

Sadie is doing great with her fixator, though I can tell it's starting to get a little harder. Amazing really. She's outlasted what her dr. said she would. I've been turning the thing 3 degrees a day. I was told in the beginning about the 2nd week I'd have to start breaking it up and doing half in the morning and half at night and might even have to move to 1 degree three times a day if that got to be too much. Well, we are into week 4 now and I just this weekend started doing half in the morning and half at night. She has just tolerated everything so well and not seemed to be in any discomfort or pain at all. But, the last couple of days she has started to fuss a bit so I've started breaking it up and that's gone really well. At her last appointment (this past Thursday), her surgeon said we probably only have about 2 more weeks of this and then we'll be done. Yeah! :-) Then the fixator will stay on a while to hold everything in place before her next surgery. Not sure when that'll be yet. Here's some before and "in progress" pictures if you're curious. I can tell a big difference when I look at these that I don't necessarily see day to day since it moves just a small amount each day.

Pre-surgery:

Beginning of week 2 of adjusting fixator:

Beginning of week 4 of adjusting fixator
By the way - the last two pics do have Sadie in the same shirt. Trust me - she didn't wear it for two weeks straight. (now, two days straight..well..maybe). It's a favorite now because it has big sleeves and is easy to get on over the fixator. Speaking of clothes, I need to get a pic of her coat. Sherry, her babysitter, picked up a coat just a little too big at the thrift store and cut up the left side all the way up including the arm and sewed bra hooks on it. That was, I can get it on and off her arm. It was perfect and much needed in these last few cold days.

In other news, Sadie is now wearing her "big girl panties"! Yeah! She was not potty trained when I got her in May. I decided not to push it and just let her be. She had enough adjustments and medical stuff and all. Well, over Christmas break I gave it a try. The first two weeks were well, interesting. She could care less about staying dry. But then something clicked and the third week she got it! She's had a handful of accidents, but that was it. Today marks day 7 accident free! (Well, except at nap and at night..but I don't count that!). I have to give a big thanks to her wonderful babysitter who really followed through and helped get her to this point! Sadie not only stays dry, but asks to go and if we're home will just take herself when needed. I consider her officially potty trained! Ah..the little things, but in our world, they're BIG! yeah Sadie!

Sadie has also entered the typical stage for her age of saying "no". A lot. Not temper tantrum no. She's very calm about it. Just a simple "no". It's kind of funny, but was starting to frustrate Hannah. Hannah would say something that was clearly true and Sadie would look at her and simply say "no". Hannah couldn't stand it. I finally had a chat with Hannah and told her that she was old enough to know a special secret. The secret was "3 year olds just like the word no" and the best thing for us to do was to just shrug and say "oh well". Well, Hannah took to that advice and it has made things much more pleasant around here. The other day though, Hannah informed me that she thought a 5 year old's favorite word was yes. (I'm thinking..um..I don't think so..but I could use a few more YES's from you, so sure, I'll encourage this!). Then she said, want to know what a grown-up's favorite word is? (This could be good, I'm thinking). She said "A grown up's favorite word is "We'll see"! Ha! too funny. The girl's got me down pat! I'm a little suprised she didn't say a grown up's favorite words are "we'll see and if you ask me again, the answer is no". :-)

Christmas Fun!

2008-12-30T19:29:00.012-06:00

We had a great Christmas. I know I'm behind all my other blogging buddies in putting up Christmas pictures. But, here they are! We had a great time. Christmas Eve was quiet and low key. We did make it to our Christmas Eve service at church. Bedtime was NOT so low key and quiet. Hannah was very over excited and didn't fall asleep until after 11:00! That didn't stop her from waking me and Sadie up at 6:15 on Christmas Day though! Sadie was not ready to get up and did not want to go downstairs. Not really understanding why Hannah was jumping up and down excited and yelling "don't you want to go downstairs and see what Santa brought?? don't you..don't you??!", Sadie just kept saying "no" and rolling over. Finally, I got her up and we all headed downstairs. Once she saw what was waiting for her, Sadie perked up and had a great time. They both were thrilled with their presents. Their big gift was a set of puppets and a doorway puppet theatre to share. Later, my parents and grandfather came over for lunch and we exchanged more gifts. The girls had a blast playing with with everyone. The following morning, we headed over to Beth and Wayne's (nana and granddaddy) house where all their cousins were that day and exchanged gifts again! Hannah stayed to play with Elizabeth since we don't get to see them very often. And those girls have always had a bond that's neat to see. They are two years apart, but very much alike and they get along very well. I took Sadie home however for a nap and some quiet time with mommy. With all the excitement of the holidays, following doctor's orders to limit her activity level was about impossible anytime she was around other kids. But Christmas was good at our house. It was good to see them so excited and loving every minute. And you want to know a secret? It was so special watching Sadie in her first Christmas home. And great watching Hannah be so excited. But, it's also fun that Hannah is old enough now that we are slowing moving out of those toddlerish / preschool toys for her. Not completely..she still loves the ones she has and she still plays with her dolls and stuffed animals and princess stuff. She loved the tinkerbell play set she got from her grandfather and was thrilled with the princess leapster game she got. But, she also got some stuff that *I've* had fun with!! ha! craft kits, interesting books that I enjoy reading to her, and a game that's actually fun to play! (Honest confesssion - I'll play the preschool games, but I just don't actually enjoy Candyland). Anyway, Happy New Year!!

(Does this face not just scream "excited!" She was jumping up and down too!)

Sadie checking out her stocking stash (with piece of chocolate already in her mouth! That girl loves some candy!)

Puppet show time! We've all three had fun with this one!

Wearing gradma's glasses

The girls hanging out with papa (my grandfather)

Tinkerbell flies off on her new hippity hop!

Enjoying a ride on grandpa's shoulders

Sadie's Surgery Update

2008-12-20T20:44:00.009-06:00

We are home and Sadie is doing well. We started our trip to Atlanta a little earlier than planned. Our dr. office called on Thursday morning to tell me that our time had changed and we needed to be at the hospital at 6:30 the next morning. You know, that's 5:30 in our time zone. That would mean leaving my house at 2:30 in the morning! yikes! So, I made some quick changes, left school early, and was able to get things together to leave that evening instead. It turned out great because I actually left my house right about Sadie's normal bedtime. She slept most of the way there. Friday morning, Sadie was in a good mood and all smiles for everyone. I love this picture of her in her hospital gown and the hat! That was actually my hat I had to wear to accompany her into the OR. But while we were waiting Sadie had some fun with it.

When it was time, I was allowed to accompany her to the OR and stay with her until she was asleep. I just sat beside her and was rubbing her arm talking to her while she breathed in the mask and fell asleep. It was so gentle, easy, and non-traumatic. Then, I was escorted out of the OR and to a post-op room to wait. Her surgery only took a little over an hour, and during that time I was able to go downstairs to fill her prescriptions. Her surgeon came to talk to me when they were finished and said she did great! He gave me some instructions and then I just had to wait until she came out of recovery. When they brought her to me a few minutes later, she was just barely awake, but not really. She would open her eyes and look at me, I'd ask her if she was ready to sit up, she'd say "no" and close her eyes again. She slept on and off like this for close to an hour. Finally, she sat up, drank some juice, and asked for her shoes. Amazing!

When we got back to the hotel room, she was very sleepy and a bit nauseous for the first couple hours. But after a good nap, we were even able to go out for a little while and get something to eat, though she didn't eat but a few bites of anything. We stopped at Family Dollar and Sadie, who NEVER begs for toys, latched on to a toy cash register and wasn't letting go. What was I suppossed to do when she chose to insist on a toy for the first time on the same day she had surgery and had both arms bandaged up? I intended to buy her one there anyway, but I was thinking of the $1-$2 toys. Nope - she picks the $10 one (that wasn't worth $10). I guess she figured I wouldn't say no to her on that day. She was right - she came back to the hotel with the cash register. :-)

Sadie slept well through the night, only waking once for pain medicine. When she woke up this morning she was hungry and anxious to go home. We ate some breakfast (yummy banana bread thanks to one of my students!!), packed up, and were home before lunchtime. We have taken it easy and relaxed today. That's the plan for a while. We return to Atlanta on the 29th for a post-op visit and to have Sadie's bandages removed. At that time, I will learn how to clean the fixator and adjust it each day. Until then, it's to be left alone. Except, her surgeon told me I needed to find something to cover the pins sticking out. He said I'd just have to get creative because they had not come up with a good solution yet. I tried a couple things at home - and this is what I came up with - sponges covered with disney princess medical tape. So far, so good. The blue bandage on her right hand (where her thumb was removed) can be taken off tomorrow night. She doesn't seem to be affected by that hand at all - she just does everything with it like she was before.

Sadie is still on some pain medicine, but there's only been a couple times she seemed to be hurting. On the way home today, she got a bit restless in the car and started whining and fussing. I asked her "does it hurt?". She said "yes". So I asked "your arm hurts?", to which she replied "NO. leg. leg hurt". Then, it was "tummy hurt". Then "ear hurt", "foot hurt", "nose hurt", and on and on. It was too funny. All of a sudden everything hurt EXCEPT the part of her body that had surgery. I think she was just ready to be home because as soon as we got home, she seemed to feel good. The biggest challenge I think is going to be following her dr. orders to limit activity level for two weeks. She's clearly feeling so much better now that we're home and has been enjoying playing with Hannah. Thanks so much for all the prayers!!

Prayer Request and Christmas Pictures

2008-12-14T22:11:00.009-06:00

What a busy time we had this past weekend! Friday, Sadie and I trekked to Atlanta for her pre-op appointment. She's having surgery there on Friday. Sadie will be having her right "floppy thumb" removed and a fixator placed on her left hand / wrist that will stretch some of her muscles out before her next surgery in a couple months. Altogether we are looking at probably 3 surgeries in the next 6-12 months, but then we should be done. I'd appreciate your prayers for my sweet baby girl Friday and for her recovery after surgery. The actual surgery is outpatient, and we will be staying in Atlanta for one night before coming home Saturday morning. You can also pray for traffic conditions going into Atlanta Friday morning - yikes!

Saturday morning, we headed to my school for their annual Pancake Breakfast / visit with Santa / auction / fundraiser. Kindergarten was singing that morning which meant Hannah was singing. She was beyond excited. Hannah was great - very dramatic with her motions to the song and she sang every word. She is such a performer. Look for her on a stage near you one day!! (Hannah in white shirt / red pants)

We saw Santa there at the school. Yeah! Picture with Santa - check off the list! Now I don't have to go to the mall (although he IS my favorite, but we're going to make do with this friendly Santa this year). Sadie looked like she might cry for about 5 seconds and then glanced at Hannah. When she saw Hannah liked Santa, she decided she'd like him too! Ah - sibling peer pressure at it's best! (sorry, no pic. of the girls with Santa either right now)

This picture was suppossed to be of the two little girls. The little one in blue is Ella, Sadie's friend from her babysitter. They LOVE each other. Can't you tell from this picture? ha! They really do love each other, and at least mine loves to have her picture taken. But we had just walked through a huge crowd (100's of kindergarteners who just finished performing and their parents) and Sadie was a little freaked by it. Then we saw Ella. You know how it's kind of weird when you see someone you know from one setting in a completely different setting and it kind of makes you step back and go "wait!" (or is that just me?). I think that's what Ella and Sadie were feeling. They wouldn't even smile when we got the two big sisters to come join them. oh well.

Saturday night, I took Hannah and her friend Joy on a special "big girls" outing to see the Nutcracker. It was long, but lots of fun. They both sat on the edge of their seats for the entire two and a half hours. Well, except for intermission when they were both dancing in the hallway trying to imitate the dancers from the ballet. I hope next year Sadie can join us. This is the second year I've taken Hannah and she loves it. But Sadie was still a little young and it would have crushed Hannah to have to leave early because Sadie got restless. So - she enjoyed a fun "little kids" evening with Nana and her favorite 2 year old cousin Bill.

Here's some Christmas pictures I took last weekend with the girls before church.

*I love how Sadie is looking at Hannah for her cue on what kind of face to make! Silly Face picture!

*"okay - let's look sweet and do a good job in this one. Mom won't let us leave here you know until she gets a photo worthy of a Christmas card. Trust me, I've done this for the last two years." (just for the record, I'm not doing Christmas cards this year, at least not before Christmas. I'm aiming for a New Year's card though...it's a goal, not a promise!)

*I let Hannah take this picture, just for fun. I thought she did a good job!

There were many more pictures I intended for this post...maybe they'll get added later. Maybe. :-)

In the meantime, I hope you are all enjoying this Christmas season!

Updates

2008-12-02T19:32:00.010-06:00

I hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving. We spent a couple days at my parents and enjoyed that. Here's the girls with their great-grandfather the day after Thanksgiving.

While we were there, we visited the mall and saw this bungee-jump thing set up. Hannah wanted to try it so I let her. And then Sadie wanted to try it, so she went too. They had a blast!

Seems like there's been so much to update on lately and now that I've actually sat down at the computer to do it, I'm having a hard time thinking what exactly to update on! But once I start writing I usually go with it, so here goes....

Sadie -
She is doing great! Talking more and more each day. She's happy and easy going for the most part. She's sleeping great. Having two children is more work than one in many ways. But I know I've had more energy these last six months than I had the first six months Hannah was home. So, in that sense it's easier. Um, possibly because Hannah didn't sleep through the night for a year. But both my girls are regularly sleeping through the night and except for a day here and there (usually when one doesn't feel well), they have been the last 6 months. Ah..they sleep through the night = I sleep through the night = we all are happier and more pleasant (at least some times!). But back to Sadie, she's simply amazing at how she's just gone with the flow with everything. Medically, she's been tougher though. I think we've seen most of the specialists at Children's Hospital. Not really, but it seems that way. Everything is good..no major problems. It's just taken a lot of time and visits to get it all sorted out that everything is good. I heard from the genetics clinic right before Thanksgiving. All Sadie's genetic testing came back normal. She does not have any syndromes or chromosone abmormalities. So, that was a relief and a praise.

I keep thinking we're going to wind up all these dr. appointments soon, but we're really not. We're just starting "phase 2"! I can't complain though because we have gotten good reports at every single one. Sadie goes back to the international adoption clinic in a couple weeks for a follow up appointment. We also have a pre-op appointment next week in Atlanta. Then, Sadie is having her first surgery in Atlanta on December 19th. It's outpatient, but we will spend one night in Atlanta just to be close to the hospital / surgeon should any issues come up. In some ways, I don't like that it's right before Christmas, her first Christmas home. But, the good thing is that it gives me two full weeks off with her afterwards before I go back to school. Oh, and the other thing about Sadie is that I spoke with the nurse who works with her nephrologist (kidney dr.) this week. I explained my slight concern about the kidney issues associated with melamine (see earlier post) in China. She assured me that if there was anything going on, they would have caught it since they did such a thourough work-up on her kidneys already. But, she also pulled up Sadie's ultrasound and lab results on the computer just to double-check for me. Everything was great. Yeah! So many things to thank God for these days!!

Hannah -

Also doing well. Still loving kindergarten. Still spunky. And sweet. And my, the conversations we've had in the car lately. After I drop Sadie off at her babysitter in the mornings, the rest of the ride to work / school is full of Hannah's questions. Lately, about God. I think I need to go to seminary and get some training just to answer her questions!! Well, actually, I think she'd stump them too. Lately we've had:

1. Why did God make sharks so that they would bite people?

2. If Jesus is in your heart, how come you can't feel his feet in your heart?

(my answer that Jesus' spirit was in your heart not his body didn't satisfy. Hannah insists that He needs feet to walk and she can't feel his feet!)

3. If Jesus is our King, why doesn't he have a throne? I thought this one was easy and said He did have a throne, in heaven. Then she came back with "don't you think He needs to leave his throne and come down here and help people?"

4. Statement instead of a question: "I will see Jesus in heaven one day. Not today, but ONE day. I'm not old enough yet. But you are old enough" (Thanks a lot!)

5. Speaking of Christmas being Jesus' birthday "How old is he? Are we going to have a birthday cake? (yes), How is Jesus going to blow the candles off his cake (all 2008 of them!!)? I told Hannah we would do just a couple candles since we couldn't put enough candles on the cake for how old Jesus was. And that I was sure Jesus wouldn't mind if we blew the candles out for him. Her answer? "No. I will just pray to Jesus. I will talk to him and tell him will you please come off your throne and come to your birthday party and blow your candles off your cake!"

I'm telling y'all - I'm mentally exhausted by 7:30 in the mornings! But I also LOVE that she's that interested and pray that she always asks the questions of faith!

If you asked Hannah what the most important thing that's happened lately for her, it would be that she got new shoes. And it was a big deal because it was her first pair of "tie shoes". See, I'm lazy when it comes to tying my kids shoes. I tie little boys' and girls' shoes all day long at work. And it's okay. I really don't mind. But by the time I come home, I am done tying shoes. That, and I'm sympathetic to my girls' teachers and how many shoes they tie each day too. So I do my part and make it one less for them. The rule in our house is you can have tie shoes when you learn to tie them. Until then, it's VELCRO all the way! Hannah's been practicing, and so when it was decided she really needed new tennis shoes, I handed her mine first and told her to tie them. When she did it successfully, I announced she could pick out "tie shoes". She is SO proud of herself, and rightly so. She worked hard! Since getting them, she can even double-tie now. Do you think when she's grown I'll look back and wish I had the memory of tying her shoes over and over when she was little?? Naa..me either. Instead I'll remember her practicing to tie shoes by herself over and over and the huge smile on her face when she got it.

Me -

I have some job things going on. Good things, not bad. But things that are keeping me busy. As if I wasn't busy already! I got my score back on the first part of my National Boards that I completed last spring. I had a good score and I can "bank" it and not have to repeat that part of the boards! Big relief!! I also received a grant from the state to complete the rest of my National Boards. So, my portfolio for that is due March 31st. I'm giving myself December off worrying too much about it. There's so much going on already with Hannah's class, my class, Sadie's surgery, church, etc. and I want to enjoy this Christmas season with my kids. But, come January, I will be spending some serious time studying and working on my portfolio entries.

Christmas -

In the midst of all the business, I'm trying to stay centered and calm and remember what this season is all about. I'm really all about simple this year. Simple and meaningful Christmas celebrations. I have some fun things planned for us, and I'm letting go of some of the normal obligation-type things that don't hold real meaning for us. I'm trying to not overschedule our holidays, but provide plenty of down time to enjoy time as a family. Putting up the tree was fun this year, and for the first time, Hannah was actually a big help. Sadie - not so much, but hey, she's 3!

I also started doing advent devotionals with the girls right before bed. My good friend Becky led a workshop on advent traditions at our church a couple weeks ago, and last year she had actually introduced me to the way her family does a Jesse tree. So, we are trying it this year. The girls each have a small paper ornament with a symbol on it to color while I do the reading / devotional. Then we talk about it briefly. Then, they hang them on our Jesse tree (which is a small 3 foot artificial tree). The whole thing takes less than 10 minutes. Usually about 5. So far it's been great. Hannah has suprised me with how well she's been able to answer some of the questions and some of her ideas about the devotional. Sadie's just happy to be coloring a picture and hanging it on the tree. But that's why I like it - because it is 3-year old appropriate and 5-year old appropriate. (And appropriate for me as well!)

Today, we went to our local Christmas parade. It was fun and I hoped to get pictures, but the camera battery died. The girls racked up on the candy with huge bags full. Hannah, because she would run grab it when they threw it. Sadie..well, she had the act down. She would smile really cute and a little shyly at everyone going by. They thought she was too little and so they would actually leave the floats and run directly to her with huge handfuls of candy for her bag. It was too funny! Later that afternoon, we hit our friend Morgan's birthday party. It was a Webkinz party, so Hannah has now been introduced to the little critters. It was cute and the girls had a blast.

Well..is that enough rambling for one night? I think so. Good night and thanks for checking in on us!

Cleft Clinic Time Again

2008-11-20T21:53:00.003-06:00

While Sadie has had numerous doctor appointments in the last 6 months, Hannah has mostly had a break from all that. But today, it was her turn. Hannah and I spent some time this morning at the cleft clinic. This was our 8th visit there (counting pre-op and post-op visits), so pretty routine by now. Today's visit was great - good news and very quick. We were in and out in about an hour and 15 minutes. Typically it's about 3 hours. ENT / Audiology was good. She didn't have a formal hearing test this time because her last 3 were normal. But they did check her tubes and check for fluid in her ears. All was good there. Her speech evaluation was good too. The evaluator said pretty much what we already knew - her resonance (voice quality - often a problem for kids with clefts) was great, she had just a couple of articulation errors but they didn't seem cleft-related, and she seemed to still have a few language delays. Yep - that's what her therapists at school and the university clinic she goes to also say. And it's also what I still notice at home. Our visit with Dr. Grant was quick too. He's happy with her and said she looked and sounded great. He said to just keep putting sunscreen on her lip for outside activities and to "enjoy the lull". He said were in a time period now for her to just enjoy being a kid. (She does that anyway!) He still wants to see her once a year to check up on her, but doesn't intend to do anything else with her for a long time. He does want us to come back this summer, just before she turns six to see the oral surgeon who will do her bone graft. You may remember that she still has a hole in her gumline that will be repaired with a bone graft to give her permanent teeth somewhere to anchor to when they come in. He thinks she has a while before that, but likes to send kids to have x-rays done by about age 6. He said often it's still too early to do anything at 6, but at least you know and some kids need some minor orthodontic work prior to that surgery so it gives you time for that if necessary.

While not as busy as it been in the past, there were a few other kids we saw in passing and in the waiting area at the clinic. Hannah commented a couple times "his (or her) lip looks like mine!" or "She's from China, like me!" (We saw two other children adopted from China at the clinic this morning). It's neat to see her identify and form connections. We got to meet sweet little Madi (also adopted from China) who was at her 3 week post-op visit. I had hoped we might get a little more time to visit, but our appointment was moved up an hour earlier than originally, so we only slightly overlapped times. But Hannah's description of Madi was right on: "Aww, she's SO cute!".

We were out of there so much quicker than I anticipated and since I had already taken the whole day off of school, Hannah and I decided to do some fun things. We shopped a little, ate lunch in Subway, and played at the park together. Hannah kept grinning and saying "this is a FUN day". It was so sweet and I enjoyed getting to spend a little time with my big girl. Then, we went to suprise Sadie and pick her up early and headed outside to play some more. Now, as Hannah says, "it's back to normal!".

Babies In Need

2008-11-15T19:35:00.004-06:00

Sadie is from one of two city orphanages in the city of Taizhou, China. I am very fortunate that she is here and thriving as a healthy and happy three year old! But, her early life in an orphanage was risky for her health. As a member of a group of parents who have adopted from those orphanages, I have learned that the Taizhou orphanages were affected by the milk crisis that came up a couple months ago. If you haven't heard the story, companies in China were putting a chemical substance called Melamine in milk and formula. Melamine is used to make hard plastic. It is not meant for babies to drink! It has nitrogen atoms in it. Protein also has 1 nitrogen atom in it. (I may not have all the details exactly right). But, I do know the purpose of the melamine was to make the milk appear to have more protein than it really did. It was a cost-cutting scheme. So - watered down milk without the good stuff and instead a chemical that makes plastic. (Melamine first made the news several years ago when it ended up in pet food in the U.S. and Canada and caused death and kidney stones in pets!) Several infants in China died from this. Many others were hospitalized. When the story broke, several brands of infant formula were recalled. Orphanages across China began having their children tested for kidney issues. The most common effect seems to be kidney stones. However some children had more serious kidney issues. Adoptive parents also began having their children tested for kidney stones. Some children living here in the U.S. adopted from China have tested positive, a few even without symptoms (though most had some sort of symtom). Some of these kids were adopted as far back as 2005. Neither of my girls have been tested for kidney stones. Hannah has been here 2.5 years (and was off formula for a while before that I'm sure) and has shown no symptoms. Sadie also has shown no symptoms, but I do plan to ask some more questions when we have our appointment at the international adoption clinic in December. I feel like she's fine mainly because she had a complete kidney work-up that should have caught stones or kidney damage if there was any. She got a glowing report from the dr. on her kidneys. However, they weren't *looking* for stones - we were there for other reasons. So, I do want to ask some questions just to be safe. Especially since now we know that her orphanage was using Sanlu milk powder, one that was recalled. But my purpose in posting this tonight is really for the other children left in the orphanages in Taizhou. One of the members of our group found an article on Taizhou orphanages and the milk crisis online. Due to this and some other connections that have been made, we have reason to believe that the orphanages there are having a hard time getting safe formula for the infants in their care. Most of the domestic brands were pulled from the shelves after the melamine news. Especially the cheap ones that the orphanage could afford. That's a good thing..very good. But, the imported ones are more expensive and the orphanages there already manage on very little. I got to visit Sadie's orphanage. My impression was that they did the best they could with what they had. She clearly had been cared for and loved. But there was no "stuff". No toys, no place for the kids to play, no books, very old cribs, nothing for the kids to do. Very minimal surroundings. There is so much they could use. But formula for the infants? That should be a basic right. We have found a way to give back to these orphanages. Children's Hope International is partnering with us by allowing us to direct funds raised through their organization. They will purchase safe formula in China for the Taizhou orphanages. This fundraiser is only going to last through November 21st, so that the formula can get to the orphanages quickly. If you would like to help provide safe formula for these sweet babies (some of whom I got to meet and see personally!), please click on the link at the end of this. It will take you to a Children's Hope website that describes what we're doing and gives you a chance to donate. I just put mine in. I know that it's almost Thanksgiving, and then coming right after is Christmas. I also know that it's a tough time for many economically. In some ways, it's not such a good time to ask people to give something. But, perhaps it's actually the *perfect* time to ask. What a way to begin the season of advent that starts soon. To begin preparing for the Christ child baby by offering a gift that will help other babies in need. I know you only have a few days before the 21st. If you can't donate at this time (and even if you can!), please take a minute to pray for these sweet children all over the world that need us to remember them! Thanks!

Link to donate:

http://chi.convio.net/goto/taizhou

Halloween , 6 months, and freedom thoughts!

2008-11-04T19:55:00.008-06:00

Yes, this is a post that covers a little of everything!!

We had a fun halloween at our house. Hannah was Snow White. Sadie was some kind of princess, but I'm not sure exactly what. Since she didn't exactly have a concept of Halloweeen, it was hard to ask what she wanted to be. So, I pulled our dress up box out Friday afternoon so she could pick what to wear. I think they're both cute! Let's just say - Sadie now DOES have the concept of halloween down. It took her no time to master the "hold your bucket up and smile really cute and people will give you CANDY!" skill.

Yes, Sadie has learned many useful things the last six months! You know, it's hard to believe that six months ago I saw her for the first time. I've experienced God's AMAZING work so many times over the past three years. Well, and really over my life in general. And yet, when I stop the busyness enough and get still for just a few minutes to really think about it, what He did to bring both of my sweet girls home still absolutely takes my breath away. Sadie fits our family so perfectly. I remember when I saw her sweet picture on an e-mail from my agency last December...not even a year ago. I remember just *knowing* that she belonged with me. I wasn't even actively looking. I already had my paperwork in China to adopt a second child, but I thought I had a long wait ahead and thought I had plenty of time. I had a new job, Hannah was still in preschool, and I thought my plate was full enough for the time being. Not to mention I absolutely didn't have the financial resources to think about doing this again so soon. I was content to wait. But, when I saw her picture that day in December, I just knew all that went out the window. I'm sure my wonderful co-workers remember that day well too. You know, since I was absolutely useless that day and they had to pick up the slack for me! (Thanks y'all!) I remember trying to call Karla, my social worker, and she was in a staff meeting. So, I e-mailed her and just expressed an interest, but I was really thinking "she's probably already found a family by now". And then I remember checking my e-mail repeatedly to see if Karla got out of her staff meeting and e-mailed me back...and the butterflies and yet relief to hear that no, she did not have a family yet. I put her file "on hold" that day so I could talk to a doctor about her health report. But the whole time she was "on hold" (only a few days), I knew I'd already decided. Then I remember when I finally talked to the doctor who had reviewed her file. It was the last day of school before Christmas holidays and I'd left her a message and was waiting for her to call me back. I must have checked my cell phone 20 times that day to see if she'd called. Again, useless day at work...lucky to have great co-workers! And for the record, I'm not usually useless at work, only when I'm adding a new child to my family! And I'm done now. :-) Anyway, early that afternoon I did hear back from the doctor. And after I got off the phone with her, I called Karla to say "yes" officially! It was not a good time in my human terms to do another adoption!! And I'm so thankful it happened exactly when it did. God's hand was and is all over it!! And now today, I celebrate having this sweet, funny (oh - she becomes funnier and funnier every day!) three year old as my daughter for six months! I don't know how to word how that makes me feel except to go back to what I said earlier and say that it absolutely takes my breath away to think about that. I thank God for interrupting my comfortable, somewhat settled life twice now to bring about blessings beyond what I could have imagined!

I had an interesting conversation with Hannah this morning on the way to school. Today is of course election day. Well, Hannah was going to have an opportunity to vote for our president in a mock election at school. So, I thought I should kind of prep her a little by explaining what it's all about. She's in kindergarten, remember. The conversation didn't go so well as far as helping her understand what it was all about. It was just way over her head. And she wasn't alone - that was true of most kindergarteners. The democratic process to a kindergartener is more about voting whether to have pizza or ice cream for their class party. After all, that's relevant to their lives! So, I was sitting in the car trying to explain elections, presidents, and the democratic process to my five year old this morning. And I was failing big time, so I finally gave up and told her to just have a good day at school. But when she came to my classroom this afternoon with a smile and a sticker on her shirt that said "I voted for president", something stirred inside me. And it hit me - she gets to vote. Both my girls will have a vote. Not just in the mock school elections they will have over the years. Not just in the real elections they will have the opportunity to make their voices heard in. But in life. They will get to make decisions that effect their lives and that effect others lives as well. They have freedom. Freedom to live their lives the way they choose and freedom to be who they want to be. And for two little girls who began life as orphans in the world and then were adopted, that just seemed like a big deal to me. But, my prayer is that they carry that concept farther to what it's meant to be. That they realize where their true freedom comes from - that they have the freedom to worship the God who created them, that they have the freedom to become not just what they want to be, but who they are meant and called to be. And that seems like a big deal for all of us who are no longer orphans, but adopted by God!

Just Bragging a Little!

2008-10-27T20:20:00.008-05:00

Well, you know I like to brag on my girls. This time though, I'm bragging on myself. Yeah - not a humble thing to do, I know. Look at these pictures. They are of Hannah painting Sadie's fingernails and of the girls getting ready for bed. But look at their hair.

They both got haircuts. And guess who cut them? ME! They've both needed cuts desperately, and we haven't really had time to go do it. Hannah especially needed a haircut. And Saturday night I was thinking I really need to take them on Sunday for haircuts. And I thought, well, it would be cheaper and quicker if I just did it myself. So, Sunday morning I put some fun "haircut music" on and plopped Hannah in Sadie's booster seat in the middle of the kitchen. Hannah got a lot cut..which I was nervous about. See, I think I failed cutting in kindergarten! ha! I teach preschoolers every day how to cut, but I can't cut straight across a piece of paper without a line drawn. But I decided that I might as well go for it now while they were young enough that they wouldn't be too embarrassed and they would forgive me if I butchered it too badly. And it's far enough away from Christmas that we could have "repair work" done before then if needed. hehe! So, after I had a pile of hair all over the kitchen (which Hannah thought was the funniest thing ever and told her whole kindergarten class about), I sent Hannah to look in a mirror and started on Sadie. She was easier since she didn't need much done..mostly just bangs. But, I think they turned out pretty cute. Never mind that all day Sunday and Monday, I kept noticing little "twigs" I didn't get on Hannah and saying "hey, hold still..let me get that one!". But still..not bad for a first try. And the important part - they liked their haircuts. And no more hair in their eyes. Mission accomplished!

Happy Birthday Sadie!

2008-10-18T20:38:00.009-05:00

I can't believe I've gone two weeks again without posting...well, that may be about all you can expect for a while. It's just busy. Not bad busy - just busy around here. Add to that my computer crashed. I was able to hook an old one up - but it's much slower. So, I'm not as motivated to post when it takes a long time. Hopefully I'll have my regular one fixed, especially since I have SO many pictures stored on it. Thankfully, I have both girls' China pictures backed up on discs. And I have Hannah's whole first year home. I also have everything from the time Sadie came home still on my camera. But, that leaves Hannah's 2nd year here - all those pictures are not backed up...so I'm hopeful I can get the computer fixed. And I've learned my lesson - backing up the pictures will be my first task!

Sadie's birthday was last weekend. She turned 3 years old. We had some friends over for dinner and cake and presents. Sadie loved it and it was clear she had watched carefully at Hannah's birthday a couple months ago. She knew exactly what her role was: blow the candles out, eat cake, open presents! It's hard to believe she has already been a part of our family for 5 months. She has come so far in so many ways. I really felt like Sadie had quite a few delays at first. She still has some, but she is moving right along quickly. She is even acting like a 3 year old now...you know, has her own opinion and not afraid to share it, gets a little bossy, says "uh-uh" and "no", and her favorite sentence is "I DO DAT!" (which is equal to Hannah's favorite phrase at three of "by MYSELF!") and her favorite word is "MINE". I love it! Happy Birthday sweet Sadie! I'm so glad you were here at home to celebrate this year and look forward to many more celebrations with you!

Fun at the Beach

2008-10-06T21:34:00.011-05:00

Before I get to the beach pictures...I have to share a funny story. It may embarrass me, but it was funny. Today, the firefighters visited kindergarten at my school. As a fireman is showing Hannah's class a smoke detector, he asks "does anyone know what it means when this goes off?" Without missing a beat, Hannah says "mama burned the chicken again"! AAGH!

Well, in my defense..it doesn't usually BURN, but when I coat the chicken with something, it does set off our smoke detector sometimes. I think we just have a sensitive smoke detector! Well, the teachers and firemen got a laugh about it. Hannah's teacher came and told me about it. Hannah said her teachers laughed but the kids didn't. I'm sure they didn't laugh because her answer was logical to them and they didn't find it funny. Doesn't everyone's mama set the smoke detector off when cooking? (humor me, people!) ha!

We were very fortunate to be able to spend this past weekend at the beach with my parents and my brother. It was a short vacation...but nice anyway. Both girls had a great time, and I did too!

Enjoy the pics. These are just a few - I'll post more this weekend.

We're Still Here...

2008-10-01T22:08:00.001-05:00

I know, it's been a long time. I have some things to update soon. And hopefully beach pictures soon too!! Sadie had her genetics appointment this week. I'll probably fill you in on the long version later. The short version is the appointment was long, we waited forever, the actual visit with the dr. was fine, we had blood work done, and we won't know the results for probably months.

I had Hannah's kindergarten conference recently. Her teacher said she was doing great, she had no concerns, and Hannah was "a dream". She showed me some of Hannah's journal, and she's starting to write very simple sentences. I know from her homework and books we read here, that she's recognizing some sight words. She knows all her letter sounds. She scored very well on the state's early literacy assessment. I was actually amazed at how well she's done. What really made me feel good though was that her teacher said she was having no problems socially and that she was in fact very social (and I'm thinking, yeah..that means she likes to talk too much! I know teacher lingo and what you mean when you say "social" ha! But her teacher said, no - definately in a good way). She said she's helpful and kind to other kids. She also said she wasn't bossy. I can't say that's always true at home! Hannah relishes the big sister role and while she's kind about it (usually), she definately thinks Sadie should do whatever she says. Her teacher also said she was always so excited to participate in everything and it was clear that she just loved learning. I have to admit, I was quite proud of my spunky, determined, sweet-hearted girl. She's come SO FAR in two years!

We've been good..just incredibly busy. But, while you wait, here's a fun story from mine and Hannah's conversation today. It started this morning when Hannah was asking about Jesus being in heaven. Then tonight, the conversation went like this.

Hannah: Does Jesus wear a dress?
Me: huh? oh, you mean a ROBE. Well, that's what men wore during the time Jesus was living on the earth.
Hannah: Does Jesus wear a dress in heaven?
Me: um..well, I really don't know what people wear in heaven. What do you think Jesus wears?
Hannah: UNDERWEAR! He's a boy. Not panties like a girl.

There you have it! insight into the mind of a five year old!
Have a great weekend. I promise to have pictures in the next update. Hopefully next week.

Catching Up: MORE doctors, Moon Festival, and More

2008-09-12T21:01:00.004-05:00

I can't believe it's been TWO weeks since I updated. Is anyone still reading? Anyone?

I thought August was going to be very busy with school starting, but August actually breezed by pretty well. September...that's a different story. It's been good, but very busy.

Sadie has had two doctor appointments in the last two weeks. First, we went to Atlanta to see a hand surgeon there. You may know my first two experiences with surgeons weren't great. I found this doctor from someone I share a yahoo group with who also had a daughter adopted with radial club hands. I LOVED this doctor! He spent 40 minutes with Sadie and I, explained things very well, answered many questions, and was wonderful. I got some new information on Sadie's hands and specifically her bones. Some of that information is "store away in your brain" kind of info - you might need it one day, but it doesn't affect anything now and doesn't necessarily require treatment for every single thing. But good to know and things neither of our previous doctors found. He's is going to do some surgery on her hands beginning in December. It looks like three surgeries, with the first being very minor and an outpatient surgery. I'll give more details later. I really thought and prayed long and hard whether to do any surgery to her hands other than remove her floating thumb on her right hand. I think she's perfect just the way she is and I know God thinks so too! But, I feel at peace with the decision to go ahead and think this will be best for HER in the long run for several reasons.

This past week, we visited the kidney doctor at Children's. I'm glad to say that everything there checked out great. The doctor we met with was very nice, had good information, and said her kidneys worked beautifully. He wants to follow her as she grows (every year or couple of years) just to make sure her kidney that's located in the pelvic region grows as she grows so that by the time she's an adult, it can do the work of an adult kidney. But, he doesn't forsee any difficulties. He said go about our lives and just check in with him from time to time.

What else has been going on? I've been working like a crazy person at school preparing things for the next step of working on my National Board Certification. I joined a Bible Study on Wednesday nights which will be the first group I've had since I adopted Hannah. I'm very excited about that, and I figure if the girls get in bed a little late one night a week it will be okay. They love playing in the nursery there and I have missed being a part of a group at church. I will also say that while my intentions are good to read God's Word, I have realized that I do a lousy job of studying if I don't have a group holding me accountable and some kind of structure to what I'm doing.

On the "just for fun" side of things, tonight we met with several other local families to celebrate the Autumn Moon Festival (A chinese holiday). We met at a local park, had dinner, let the girls play, read a story about the moon festival, tasted chinese desserts (umm..duck yolk? Sadie liked it - I think she was the only one) and then paraded around the park in the dark with glow-necklaces and flashlights. Oh yeah, we glanced at the moon as we passed. At least the adults. I'm not sure any of the girls even looked up as they RAN around the park. They all had so much fun!

And on a different note, some of you may remember when I went to prison in March. Prison Ministry - really! Well, Kairos (the ministry I've been involved with) is holding another ministry weekend at Tutwiler Prison for Women next weekend (September 18-20). I am not directly involved this time, but I will be praying for the team, the women who will experience God's love and grace (some for the first time) and the logistics of the weekend. So actually, I AM directly involved, because that prayer support is important work. Will you please join me in praying for God's power and love to become real to the women that weekend? You can be involved too! Thanks!

Happy Birthday Hannah!!

2008-08-30T20:45:00.007-05:00

Hannah is now 5! She's been anticipating this day for months and I think it met her expectations. She came running in my room (at 6:30!!!) this morning yelling "It's my birthday, it's my birthday, it's my birthday, I'm 5 today!!" over and over and over.... And she kept saying "today, everyone is going to celebrate ME!" We had a treasure hunt in our house for her to find her present from me. I wish I had it on video - it was priceless! She was a WILD girl..running around the house searching for clues. Then she was a WILD girl playing. I was exhausted by 8:00 a.m.!! And I was thinking that I still needed to finish cleaning a bit, needed to get the rest of the things ready for her party..and she was going CRAZY! Ah..we had a new movie we haven't seen, so it was the perfect day to pull it out. I put in Finding Nemo, and she happily watched the movie and Sadie half watched / half played (but she wasn't WILD so her playing was okay!). Ah, peace. I was able to clean, get things ready, and shower. After a few errands (including picking up her cake which was really late so we had to sit in the car and sing songs and play games while waiting), grandma and granpa arrived and she once again became WILD. She was so excited. We had lunch, then had her party. She had a gymnastics party at Head Over Heels. It was a lot of fun and she completely enjoyed every minute. Sadie loved it too. I was a little concerned that Sadie would have a hard time with Hannah opening presents. She's never been to a birthday party and I was afraid she wouldn't understand...but there was no reason to fear. Sadie was quite content with the cup of candy (party favor) provided and the discarded wrapping paper. You gotta love two year olds! It was so sweet to see all of Hannah's friends with Sadie too. They were so nuturing and caring to her. Of course, Sadie *thinks* she's as big as them and can do whatever they can do. And for the most part, she does. She impressed a couple of the other mamas with her ability to unwrap small tootsie rolls. I wasn't suprised - I knew my sweet-tooth girl would find a way to get into that candy!

Anyway, Hannah had a great day and was exhausted! It took her a total of 4 minutes to fall asleep when she finally got in the bed tonight. I can't believe she's FIVE! That's like - she's a real KID (as oppossed to toddler / preschooler)! As I was saying a thank you prayer tonight for the incredible gift I have in this spunky kid, I had to whisper a prayer for another woman on the other side of the world and wonder if she marks this day too? I know she does. How can she not? And she actually (we think) kept Hannah for four months when she was born. And at that time Hannah was relatively healthy. Even with the cleft lip and palate (which makes feeding in newborns difficult) and most likely extremely limited resources, she found a way to feed and nourish her through those first few months. She gave her life! And for that, I am extremely grateful. I pray she finds a peace in her heart today and that she knows that little baby is now thriving as a five year old. Happy Birthday sweet Hannah!

Here's a few pictures from her party:

Yes, that is a wedding dress. Hannah has been begging for one..and grandma provided one as her birthday present. She was so excited. Now she justs wants a suit for her little friend at school so they can get married! The only thing is, she hasn't let HIM know of the plan yet. details, details..

Just Have to Brag...

2008-08-21T18:55:00.004-05:00

This is my 2 year old with no usuable thumbs cutting with scissors! She watched Hannah for a minute, then asked for the scissors and took off! Simply Amazing!

Pictures and Quick Update

2008-08-08T21:17:00.009-05:00

All ready for kindergarten in her "adorable" outfit and sparkly shoes - that's totally why she's smiling so early in the morning!
It was a big day for Sadie too - her first day to stay without Hannah

Sitting outside her classroom waiting for the 7:45 announcement to enter

Just hanging out at home. The girls both sleep in their own beds, but *my* bed is a favorite early morning hang-out spot.

What a week! It was been a good week, but tiring. The first week is always like that. I have been back at work all week. The kids came Thursday so had two days. As far as I'm concerned, I really like my class this year. I have a sweet group of kids. Some are not too sure of this whole school thing yet, but I'm confident they'll settle in a routine quickly. Hannah has had a great two days in kindergarten. She was so confident walking off. I walked her to her classroom the first day, and let her go by herself today. Honestly, she would have been fine going by herself the first day...but *I* wanted to walk her down anyway. The first day of school she woke up and said "YEAH! I get to go to kindergarten so I can wear my new sparkly shoes and my new outfit...I'm going to be adorable!" ah..priorities..as long as you look cute, it'll be a good day. ha! :-) I haven't caught sight of her during the day yet, but a couple of my co-worker friends have and they've said when they see her, she always looks happy. I'm not suprised. She loves her teacher and has had happy stories and songs to share in the afternoons.

Sadie has done well this week as well...she had Hannah with her the first 3 days and then stayed by herself these last two days. Can I just say, it feels great to know she is with someone I trust and to know she's getting lots of attention and love during the day. Thanks stephanie! Her last two days have been a little tougher though - she's not been feeling well. After visiting our after-hours clinic it turns out she has an ear infection. But, after a couple doses of antibiotics, she seems to be feeling much better. And speaking of antibiotics..here's my public service announcement. Did y'all know Publix is giving away free antibiotics? No insurance co-pay or anything. There's only about 5 antibiotics they give away, but they are pretty common ones. Amoxicillan is one. I don't remember exactly what they all are..but they don't even ask to see your insurance card. free..really! I hope your children don't need them anytime soon..but even with good insurance (like I have), it's nice to get something free if you do.

I started this post Friday night, but I'm sure it'll be Sat. before I actually post it since the pictures are taking a while to upload...and I'm tired!

Headed towards the big K!

2008-07-31T23:49:00.003-05:00

I know this is two posts in a row on Hannah. I have some things to update soon on Sadie too and she's doing GREAT. But, I'm just feeling all sentimental about Hannah right now I guess. In less than one week, she starts kindergarten. Kindergarten..the big K...I really didn't think it's be that big of a deal to me. She's been in the school system since she was 3 (well, really about 3 weeks before her 3rd birthday!) in the preK program. She spent this past year in the same school she'll be in for kindergarten. I really thought I'd look at it as just another grade jump. And I did until recently. But I guess this week it's hit me that she's not a preschooler anymore. Kindergarten starts the big world of "elementary school". And it is different. Class size is bigger, not as many adults per classroom, new skills, higher expectations, not as much hand-holding as we do with our little bitty ones, more independence. And you know what though? I'm really not very nervous. I feel really really good about it. I love our school. It's a wonderful place to work and I think it's a wonderful place for a five year old (almost!) to start her journey through school. I'm thrilled with her teacher this year (but to be honest - there are so many good teachers!). And you know what else? She's READY.

One thing I've been a little concerned about for kindergarten prior to this moment was her age. She will most likely be the absolute youngest child in her class. She turns 5 August 30th. The cut-off date to start K is to be 5 by September 1st. I know of many parents who choose to delay kindergarten for their children who are very young for a year. And in many cases, it's a good choice. It's a choice I might have made for Hannah if circumstances were different. But, because she was already in the PreK program at her school and because that same PreK program doesn't accept children who are old enough for kindergarten (for a good reason I might add!) AND because not working is not an option for me (my kids and I all like to eat!), my only other choice would have been to pull her out of the school and put her somewhere else for a year, then bring her back to the school. To me, that was going backwards and didn't make any sense given her situation. So, I've known basically from the time I got Hannah, that at this moment, she would go to kindergarten ready or not. But like I said, she is READY! She's a quick learner with things that involve memorization. She's known her alphabet and numbers since she was 3. She's known most of the sounds for the letters for at least 1/2 a year now. Not due to any great effort on my part - she simply absorbs and remembers things like that. This summer she learned to create rhyming words (that was tough..but she did it because she wanted to and was determined. I did not work with her - she just kept constantly..CONSTANTLY saying "do these words rhyme?") She can tell you her whole name (and her chinese name), her phone number, her address, and my name. She can write her name. She can draw and cut and glue. She can follow directions and routines (in my opinion - far more important than the academic stuff at this age anyway). She's independant with almost every self-help skill needed: bathroom, hand-washing, clothing fasteners, opening her milk carton and snack, etc.. except she can't tie shoes yet (but I also know she certainly won't be alone in that area and she has velcro tennis shoes now anyway). She loves to look at books and make up stories. She puts on "shows" at home. She knows that a clock tells you what time it is and a calendar tells you what day it is. If you would have asked me in April, what was I concerned about for her transition to kindergaren, I would have told you: social skills and language. Socially, she has seemed to lag just a bit. Understandable..but I wanted her to have more confidence, be less sensitive when things didnt' go exactly her way, and handle conflicts with peers appropriately (i.e. - without falling apart). And I've talked before how she still has concerns with speech and language.

But this summer - she has again made huge jumps forward in both of those areas. See previous post about her and her little t-ball friend...yeah, I think she can handle conflicts. She has walked down the halls of school with me all week as I've been getting my classroom ready. She stops and talks to everyone. She tells them she is in kindergarten and she can tell them exactly where her room is (it's a big school so that's quite an accomplishment! But then again, this is the kid who gives me directions to go places and tells me when to turn right and left - accurately!)
Socially, she's going to be fine. Maybe too fine - I hope she doesn't get in trouble for talking too much! Hannah knows how to answer questions that could be perceived as sensitive with confidence. Questions like: why doesn't your mommy look like you? Where is your daddy? What happened to your mouth? You know, those questions parents of adopted kids know they will have to face one day. Hannah doesn't get them a lot..but she has gotten them and she can answer them. She's compassionate and knows how to make good choices. (I'm NOT saying she always makes the right choice- but she does know how to). Language..well, she still struggles some with that. That's why she's still in speech. But it's so not a big deal. She has some weird word order sometimes and her questions skills still need fine-tuning. Sometimes she asks "how" when she means "why" or she answers "when" like it's a "where" or things like that. But with a little patience and clarification, her teacher will be able to make Hannah understand what she's asking for. (And her teacher this year will be great at that!).

Today, I had Hannah's end-of-session final conference for speech. We do it every semester so this was her summer semester conference. I was shown a report on a language sample that was done earlier this summer that measured Hannah's growth in language. And the speech student's advisor and I talked about Hannah's progress not just this summer but over the last two years. It's amazing. She is now only scoring about 6 months behind her peers in language. That means at almost 5 years old, her language ability is about that of a four and a half year old. That's HUGE! There are still some speech articulation delays..but that also has improved dramatically. In fact, I noticed this summer that I was no longer interpreting for Hannah to people we don't know. In the past, if Hannah got into a conversation with a new friend or someone who wasn't very familiar with her speech patterns, I found that I often had to interpret some of what she was saying. I'm not sure when it hit me that I hardly ever do that anymore. Even though she has errors in her speech, the majority of the time, people understand her and she can stand on her own. She also has the confidence to try again when they don't. She'll say, "no - I said...." and repeat it. Her progress is nothing short of a miracle. I mean, this is the kid who two years ago couldn't make ANY sounds except vowels, m, and w. I'm so grateful to her surgeon and cleft team, to her wonderful speech therapists she's had (she's never had a bad one! they've all been great!), her preschool teachers, and mostly I'm grateful to God for placing this incredibly spunky, persevering, determined little girl in my life and then allowing me to see His work in her. Yeah, she's ready for the big world of kindergarten! And I'm so proud of her!

Bowling and Baseball

2008-07-23T00:27:00.008-05:00

Hannah's t-ball team had an end-of-season bowling party. They still have 2 more games (one tonight got rained out so I guess we will have two next week), but as a group we decided to skip practice this week and party instead. What fun! It was Hannah's first time to bowl and she loved it. And I have to say, watching 4 year olds bowl in general is quite entertaining. Hannah did get 1 strike during the night and was quite proud of herself. She was especially proud though of her trophy and ball her coach presented to her and to each of her teammates.

I have to tell a funny story from last week's game. Maybe you'll think it's funny, or maybe you just had to be there. At the beginning of the season, Hannah did great batting and running. She did great standing on the field too as long as the ball didn't come right by her. But the few times it did come right by her, she'd just watch it and stand still. She didn't actually TRY to get it. Well, some of the little boys on the team would of course run and grab the ball. Then, Hannah would be upset that she didn't get the ball. So, first we worked on the attitude of "It's okay if you don't get it..you're part of a team, you support your teammates, you might get it another time". Then I started telling her "It's okay if you don't get it, but if you really want to get the ball, you have to actually run towards it and not stand still". Her coach has been encouraging her in practice and in practice she's managed to get it a few times. But, that all eluded her during games until last week. Second inning (out of 3 they play) has Hannah in the outfield. Ball flies by her and she RUNS with all she has and beats 3 little boys out in getting to the ball. She grabs it, runs in, holds it up, and screams "TIME" with a HUGE grin on her face. She was quite happy with herself and decided she was going to keep going. So, during the 3rd inning, she and another little boy A. were in the infield right next to each other. I like this little boy and Hannah likes him too. They've become good buddies. But he is all boy and all about playing baseball. While their coach has been encouraging Hannah to run for the ball, he's been encouraging A. to NOT run for it all the time! He tells the kids "A. - you get the ball if it goes on this side. Hannah - you get if it goes on this side." Then to be really clear, he looks at A. again and says "do not run in front of Hannah to get the ball..if it goes over there, let her get it." Like I said, I really like this kid, but he's serious about his ball playing. He can't help it. Every single time he runs in front of Hannah to grab the ball. She's getting frustrated, wiping teary eyes, but holding it together remarkably well. And she keeps trying and he just beats her every time. Until...

The batter hits the ball, it lands in front of Hannah. She reaches for it, but A. has zoomed in too. It's on the ground, it's a struggle..hard to see who has it. Then, as A. stands up, you can see the ball is in his glove. Hannah doesn't hesitate - she reaches in his glove, pulls the ball out, thrusts it in the air, and yells "TIME!". Then she turns to A. and yells "you are not being very nice to me. Be NICE to HANNAH!". He yelled something back and they both glared at each other through rest of the inning, which was thankfully almost over by this time. Ah -nice to know she can stand up for herself when the need arises. I thought it was funny and I still chuckle thinking about it. You absolutely have to love 4 year old friendships though because who is the kid Hannah wanted to spend all her time with at the bowling party? yep..same kid. As soon as they saw each other, they hugged and ran off to play and be silly.

I have to say, when I signed Hannah up for t-ball this summer it was because she'd been asking to play baseball for a year. In her words, she wanted to "hit the ball and you watch me and say YEAH!" I hoped that she would like it and that it wouldn't be too much for her with too much pressure or focus on competition. I have to say, it was exactly what she needed this summer. It gave her something to do with her peers her age which she would have really missed this summer otherwsie. Her coaches were wonderful, her teammates were wonderful. It was a good blend of fun, learning new skills, encouragement, and challenges. It wasn't a huge time committment (which is important for ME!). It was something physical, which she NEEDS or she climbs the walls. It was just an all-around positive experience. (well except for the bugs..but hey, I can't have everything perfect!)

Photos!

2008-07-14T13:27:00.013-05:00

Here's what we've been doing in our "free" time in between all those doctors appointments mentioned in the last post....(some of these are a few weeks old, but I guess it's been a while since I posted some pictures)

Vacation Bible School (Hannah is singing with the group at their end-of-week performance)

Riding Bikes

Practicing climbing stairs at the park

Play date with our friend Ana Claire

More t-ball practices and games (it looks like in addition to Hannah, I have another future t-ball player too!)

An after-game treat by way of the local ice-cream man

Hanging out in Auburn for a weekend (which was a little hard for me as an Alabama fan, but I managed!) Just kidding! We had a great time. We did absolutely nothing productive. Our schedule went something like this: arrive in Auburn, eat lunch, swim, nap, play, swim, play, eat supper, play, watch fireworks, eat ice-cream, go to bed, wake up, eat breakfast, play, swim, play, eat lunch, go buy bubbles at wal-mart, take a nap, blow bubbles, swim, play, eat supper, swim, play, eat ice-cream, go to bed, wake-up, eat breakfast, swim, blow bubbles, and go home! It was a perfect mini-vacation! Thanks for the invite Tricia!

Visiting the zoo for Children's Hospital's Cleft Clinic's annaul "Family Fun Day". We had fun and saw quite a few lifeline families and other adoptive families there too. Sadie enjoyed the carrosel with Carley while Hannah was more into the foam and the water. Sadie also enjoyed playing a bit of peek-a-boo with sweet little Kimmie. (We did see a few animals, but spent most of our time in the Children's zoo playing and letting the kids get wet - it was a hot day!) For lunch, we ate across the table from a family from Florida who were about to bring their little boy to Dr. Grant for surgery. He had already had surgery in Florida that did not go well and so they looked elsewhere and found Dr. Grant. It made me once again appreciate how wonderful he is! He's an amazing surgeon, but also has such a great bedside manner. And he communicates with parents and kids in plain English! As soon as Hannah saw him, she ran to him calling his name to give him a hug. She told me later "Dr. Grant is the best doctor in the world!" I think I agree.

Doctors and More

2008-07-09T20:23:00.002-05:00

Well, if you're reading this, then you got the invite so WELCOME!
I was going to save this post for a few days and instead post some pictures of our Fourth, our play date wtih Ana Claire, and some other fun things. But, I'm having issues with my camera. Every time I connect it I get an error message..it's never happened before so who knows? Hopefully I can get it resolved soon. Until then, no pictures.

So, here's what we've been up to lately other than the fun stuff:

Let’s see: 2 Adoption clinic pediatricians, developmental specialist, family therapist, ultrasound technician, opthamalogist, audiologist, orthapedic intern, orthopedic physician , x-ray technician, occupational therapist intern, occupational therapist (three times), regular pediatrician, plus untold nurses to weigh, measure, draw blood, give shots, and provide stickers afterwards!

9 appointments with doctors or therapists (some combined multiple of the above people)

Snacks, treats, and small books and toys to keep us busy

Trips through the drive through at McDonald’s for lunch after some long mornings in clinics

A few tears, but more giggles

Well, we know our way around both Children’s South and Children’s Hospital! We have been busy the last few weeks with a variety of appointments. And these are all just for Sadie.
Besides that, I have been to the endodontist once and oral surgeon twice (once for work done, once just to check up on it). Hannah has been to the pediatrician (and was the recipient of some of the shots - those “five year old shots”) and has started back in speech therapy for a short 4 week summer session (twice a week.).

I can see the end of the tunnel though…we only have a few more appointments scheduled. Sadie goes back to the orthopedic doctor next week and the occupational therapist in a couple weeks. Hannah goes to the dentist at the end of the month and has 6 more speech sessions this month. August is FREE (well..we start back to school so it’s not exactly free..but you get the point). I have guarded the month of August with all I have, insisting no appointments in August unless someone gets actually sick. No routine or healthy kid appointments allowed - we’ll be busy enough. :-) In September Sadie has two more follow-up appointments - one at the nephrologist (that’s kidney doctor) and the geneticist. Oh yeah - I forgot, Hannah goes back to the cleft clinic sometime late October and Sadie goes back to the regular pediatrician in November and then in December is Sadie’s 6 month follow-up at the adoption clinic…and…Sadie will have a few more OT appointments this fall and Hannah will do another semester of speech probably starting late September or early October (twice a week for about 8 weeks) and….okay, who am I kidding? It’ll be a while before we’re finished. But it is slowing down now that we have most of these initial visits out of the way. Actually, I’ve already cancelled one appointment last week . It was Hannah at the adoption clinic. They usually don’t see kids after the first year, but because Hannah was still having significant delays in speech and language this time last year, they were going to evaluate her early this summer so we could come up with a plan for summer services if needed. But, for a variety of reasons, her appointment got pushed back until July. And she’s made huge progress this past year. And, she’s plugged into services already this summer. And she’s followed by speech therapists at school, at the cleft clinic, and at Univ. of Montevallo. So the poor girl has been evaluated enough. The day before her appointment, I was questioning why we were keeping this appointment when someone from the clinic called and was asking about what I was hoping to get from the visit (aren’t they great? I love that about them!) and honestly, I was like..well, nothing. I know what her needs still are regarding language and feel like we have a good handle on it and she’s getting what she needs. So, I asked what kind of assessments they were planning and when she told me, it was basically the same stuff she’s already had. So, I cancelled the appointment and they were very understanding and supportive. Sometimes, a morning spent playing outside and a visit to story time at the library are just more important than another evaluation, ya know?

Okay, back to Sadie. Her visits have been mostly good. Where do I start? Adoption Clinic - good reports. We love these people! Sadie is healthy- all her lab work came out great. She didn’t have many shots in China though so is now on a bit accelerated “catch up” shot regimen. Not so fun for her, but she’s a trooper. At our first visit the pediatrician noticed an “ear pit” on her left ear. To me, it looks like a freckle. I’d have never thought anything else about it. But, she said it could be indicative of something going on with the kidneys and so she sent Sadie for an ultrasound. Sure enough…her kidneys are sort of misplaced. Her left kidney is a pelvic kidney which just means it’s in the pelvic area and never rose to where it should be. Her right kidney is slightly higher than it should be. According to both the dr. and the technician…it likely means nothing except her kidneys are in a slightly different spot. Many people have a pelvic kidney and some don’t ever know it. All initial indications are that her kidneys are working fine as there are no symptoms of them not. But, just to be safe, they have referred us to a nephrologist to get everything checked out. We go in September. We have also been referred to a geneticist to rule out syndromes that can accompany a radial club hand. I’ve been told there are no obvious red flags that would indicate a syndrome, but that it’s always a good idea to get it checked. I agree especially now that we have the kidney thing going on in addition to the hand. That appointment is in September too. Between our first and second visits to the adoption clinic (about 5 weeks apart), Sadie gained 1.2 lbs. As she’s still less than 5% on the growth chart for her age, that was a good thing. The family therapist at the adoption clinic gave us a good report and thought Sadie was well on her way in terms of adjusting. The developmental therapist and I agreed almost completely on how Sadie was doing in her development. She’s actually a good bit delayed in many skill areas, but is already starting to make some jumps. Interestingly, she was not delayed at all in fine motor. Her use of her hands (which is supposed to be her special need!) is age appropriate at this time. It’s amazing what she can do..use a fork, spoon, take off shoes, zip and unzip, just about anything she wants really. Gross motor and language are actually the concerns right now. I see an improvement just in the time I’ve had her so I’m not too concerned. The plan is to give her lots of opportunities to move and talk! She definitely has a good role model for both of those in Hannah who loves to be moving and talking all the time! Seriously though, she’s managed to learn to climb up stairs just this week at the park…and is saying a lot more words too. Hannah, who you have to remember has had two years of speech therapy, is now taking on the role of therapist. I often catch her “playing speech” and saying “look at me. Say…ORANGE JUICE” or “say light..no, not Night..make your L sound”. It’s pretty funny! The dev. Specialist recommended we look into speech for Sadie this fall…so we will wait and see how she’s doing and then if I think she needs an extra boost, will try to get her into speech the same place Hannah goes (same day and time would be awesome! But that might take some um..sweet talking and fingers crossing!) She is also recommending a few sessions with Physical Therapy to give her a jump start. That remains to be seen if we can get in before school starts. I’m on the fence with that one..it wouldn’t hurt and insurance will probably cover it. But, I’m not sure it’s necessary at this point either with the fast progress she’s starting to make. So, if we can get a couple sessions in before school starts, fine. If not, I will probably decline and give it 6 months to see where we stand. Sadie’s audiology appointment was great - she hears just fine and there are no concerns there. Her vision appointment was okay. She tested as just a little nearsighted. He doesn’t want to do anything yet, but wants to see her back in two years and retest.

The orthopedic visit with the hand specialist was..so-so. The official diagnosis is she doesn’t have a radius in her left arm or a thumb in that hand and she has a “floating thumb” in her right hand. That official diagnosis is exactly the same as the “un-official diagnosis” I had before even going to China. It’s also the same as I could see with my own eyes. So, we all agree on that. What we don’t agree on yet is what to do about it. The dr. wants to splint her (which is where the occupational therapist comes in - we’re currently seeing her every couple weeks to make new splints for Sadie) at night for several months (maybe even up to a year) and then do surgery. She wants to do quite a bit of surgery and to be honest, I’m not convinced . I agree with a couple things she wants to do, but not everything. Basically, I want a second opinion. She didn’t really take time to answer my questions and didn’t want to spend any time with Sadie to see what she could or couldn’t do with her hands already. I don’t know a lot about hand surgery. But, I know enough to know that it’s very complicated and you have to be careful to make sure you increase function and not decrease it and I know enough to know I have a lot of questions. I feel like she’s probably a competent surgeon, but I need someone to take the time to answer the questions…so, I will be seeking a second opinion. The girls’ regular pediatrician has already given us a name and referred us to someone he knows to look at her, so I will be setting up that appointment soon. The good part of that visit came with the occupational therapist she connected me to for the splints. I agree with the splints,..they should help regardless of what surgery. The splint prevents further tightening of her hand and will actually stretch it out some without surgery. If Sadie later has the surgery on her wrist, the results from the splints should make it easier. Sadie doesn’t mind her splint and puts it on willingly at night. Although at our second visit, the OT had to make a different kind of splint because Sadie (aka Houdini) was somehow getting out of the first one in the middle of the night. I’m telling ya’ll - the things this girl can do with no thumbs is amazing!

The regular pediatrician visit was routine. Sadie did have to have a TB skin test (which is fine..it was simply a routine test for internationally adopted kids) and some shots and as I mentioned, Hannah also had shots. Other than that - no big deal. Well, medically no big deal. The visit was definitely a big deal to Hannah. Somebody PLEASE tell me their four or five year old is as dramatic as mine about shots! Sadie didn’t cry for her shots, but she had some sympathy tears for Hannah. Regardless, we survived and Hannah’s Blue Card for school has an expiration date of 2015 - so we don’t have to go through this again until she’s 12!! At that age, can’t I just drop her off and pick her up when they’re done? Just kidding! (sort of) Anyway, both girls are healthy. Hannah doesn’t go back for another year or two. Sadie goes back in four months for some of those catch-up shots. It remains to be seen how Sadie does with winter this year, but experience with Hannah is that we see our regular pediatrician less than any other professional because she almost never gets sick. I’m sure after her performance this week, the nurses are thankful that Hannah is a healthy child! :-)

So, don’t we sound busy? I’m just thankful we’ve had the summer to knock a whole lot of these appointments out. And like I said, I’m guarding my month of August! But really, despite all our visits to the doctors, it hasn’t seemed bad. We just take it one step at a time and do what we have to do that day. And then try to do something fun too. Sadie’s emotional adjustment has been great and that makes a huge difference. It makes things feel easy. I mean, who wouldn’t love a 2 year old that sleeps through the night, eats well, is pleasant and compliant mostly, who runs to you in the morning with arms outstretched saying “hug!“, whose laugh is contagious, who smiles and says “Tank oo” (thank you) every time you hand her anything, and who hasn‘t thrown a temper tantrum yet?? (maybe we’re still in the honeymoon phase…and we still have the age of 3 to get through, but I’ll enjoy her easy-going personality as long as I can)
And Hannah, well, she gets a little jealous from time to time. There’s some normal sibling rivalry stuff. She’s a bit more spirited and not quite as ..umm. ..easy-going (I like to think of it as she’s passionate!) But, when I catch her “reading” to Sadie or playing “speech” with her or I hear them giggling in the other room together (when they’re supposed to be sleeping), or when Hannah stands as tall as she can and proudly announces “SHE’S MY SISTER!” to literally everyone we see….it makes me smile and makes me so grateful that these two have each other. A few weeks ago I had put them to bed and gave Hannah instructions to “be quiet and go to sleep”. A little while later, I heard her get out of bed. I walked into her room ready to tell her to get back in bed. I stopped at her doorway just in time to see Hannah standing over Sadie’s bed, looking over her safety rail, standing on her tiptoes trying to kiss her. It was too sweet!!

So, this is probably more details than most of you wanted. I’ve had several people ask how things went with some of our appointments and I usually say “fine.” Things are fine, but the details seemed a bit much to get into with some quick conversations. So, here it is..our summer at the doctors! I myself have learned a lot through this summer about medical care. I’ve learned how much I appreciate living within close driving distance to a major children’s hospital. I’ve been reminded how much I appreciate having such good insurance. I’ve learned how wonderfully supportive and helpful many in the medical profession are. But, I’ve also learned that while they know more about technical and medical things, I know more about my kids’ personalities and functioning on a day-to-day basis. I’ve learned to listen carefully to what they all have to say, but then consider what I know to be true as well in making decisions.

Well, hopefully next time you check back, I'll have the camera thing figured out and can have some pictures up here!